Guest contributed by Katie McBeth
Every year World Mental Health Day is commemorated. This day of recognition is meant to help raise awareness, help dismantle the stigma, and provide those who suffer with access to support if they need it.
The focus of last year was mental health in the office: how awareness, stigma, and our work-life balance can affect workforces around the world. In America, especially, working women are often struggling to balance their life in and out of the office, and are finding it even more difficult to not let the stresses of the outside world affect their work and productivity. Although there is an increased awareness around mental illness, there is still a strong stigma on discussing it at work.
What does this mean for working women who suffer from mental illness? How can we not only become more successful in our careers, but also be more accepted for our invisible conditions? How can office leaders make a difference for all their employees? These questions can be an especially tough to parse, but they are extremely important for opening up the dialogue around mental illness in the office.
Erasing Stigma Through Dialogue
Over a lifetime, it’s estimated that the average full-time American worker spends about 90,000 hours at work. It’s no wonder, then, why this year’s theme of Mental Health Awareness Day was focused on the office. Our jobs take up a large portion of our lives, and the environment around us, our work habits, and our outside life can all factor into our mental and physical well-being.
However, it’s rare to hear conversations about mental health while actually in the office. Much of this can be due to the vulnerability of opening up about mental health conditions, but it could also be due to the fact that patriarchal standards still reign supreme in business. The idea of exposing mental illness — as well as emotion or empathy — can be seen as a weakness.
Numerous studies have come to prove this to be false, and in fact honing your emotional intelligence can play a large part in improving a business and can really shine in management. Empathy and communication, in particular, have shown to reduce employee turnover, improve team morale, and increase productivity for individuals and teams.
When discussing mental health, one of the biggest hurdles in addressing it can be the stigmas that exist around these conditions: both social stigmas (those created by society) and self stigmas (those created internally by people who suffer from mental illness). However, some of those stigmas are beginning to change, and much of that is thanks to the people who are brave enough to speak up and be open about it, and to those that have the empathy and patience to listen and learn. Scientific research has also shown that people are more willing to seek out help — via therapy, counseling, or medication — when they can overcome these stigmas.
For those of us that suffer from mental illness, being open about our struggles and our conditions can be inherently powerful. However, it can be difficult to be open if we don’t have a support system in place. On the reverse, having a supportive, empathetic, and kind boss can be a major factor in helping those that suffer feel less stigmatized by their invisible condition. Empathy is also extremely powerful, especially in the office and especially among those in management and leadership positions.
Accepting Mental Health as Physical Health
There’s a reason mental illness is referred to as an “invisible condition.” Although common misconceptions often overlook the body-mind connection, there is plenty of evidence to show that mental illnesses can have a profound effect on the physical body.
However, the general population that doesn’t suffer from mental illness could still suffer from occasional bouts of depression or anxiety brought on by work, or even external circumstances or trauma —. Prolonged exposure to stress can have physical effects as well, which is why it is all the more important to consider allowing mental health days at work.
Sick days allow employees the opportunity to stay at home and recover from the flu or from injuries. Mental health days, on the other hand, allow employees the opportunity to stay at home, relax, rest, and recover. Even for employees that don’t suffer from mental illness, mental health days allow them a chance to step away from the stress of the office and hopefully find ways to practice de-stressing techniques. About 25 percent of Americans agree that work is a main stress-point for them, and stepping away can help them find tranquility, as well as make them better workers for when they do return to the office.
Organizational stress — can result in disengagement if it goes on too long or is unaddressed. Allowing employees the chance to step away from the stress of work can help them feel more appreciated. It can also help them refocus on tasks and be more engaged in the office.
Mental health days go beyond helping those who suffer from mental illness and can help everyone feel better about their work. Examples of this increased emphasis on mental wellness can be seen in European countries where work weeks are shorter, vacation times are longer, and employees are generally happier to be working for their company. If only America could pick up these same practices, maybe our workforce would be better for it.
Changing the Workplace for the Better
Especially in the workplace, Mental Health Awareness Day — where it is frowned upon to discuss these ailments —can help create a dialogue that could lead to lasting changes for everyone.
Being a professional working women who suffers from mental illness can be difficult. Facing the constant stigma of our conditions, as well as the threat of losing our jobs if we’re having a bad day, or even being the subject of ridicule or discrimination because we can’t “showcase” our condition, is a daily worry. There will always be someone to try to put you down for something you cannot control about yourself.
However, our office is no place to face this sort of targeted discrimination, and having a supportive and understanding boss can help prevent sufferers from being alienate at their place of employment. Additionally, raising awareness around the effects of mental illness and stress in the workplace can help carve the paths for healthier lifestyle choices and happier employees.
There are ways to make lasting change in the office and in our lives, but it starts with one simple step: having a conversation. If you suffer from mental illness and feel like your manager will be receptive to discussing your concerns, then maybe it’s time to have that talk. If you’re a manager and want to showcase your support for all your employees, be open about allowing mental health days in the office, and perhaps provide resources for those that need it.
Finally, if you suffer from serious mental illness and are afraid that it will interfere with your work, know that you are not suffering alone. Seek out help, find treatment, and know that although you may have this condition forever, it will not limit the great things you plan to do with your life. You do not have to suffer in silence, and you do not deserve to be stigmatized. Let’s work on making the world a little better for everyone.
Disclaimer: The views and opinions of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com
Mental Health and the Office Why It Matters More Than Ever to Be Open About Your Struggles
Career Advice, Guest ContributionGuest contributed by Katie McBeth
Every year World Mental Health Day is commemorated. This day of recognition is meant to help raise awareness, help dismantle the stigma, and provide those who suffer with access to support if they need it.
The focus of last year was mental health in the office: how awareness, stigma, and our work-life balance can affect workforces around the world. In America, especially, working women are often struggling to balance their life in and out of the office, and are finding it even more difficult to not let the stresses of the outside world affect their work and productivity. Although there is an increased awareness around mental illness, there is still a strong stigma on discussing it at work.
What does this mean for working women who suffer from mental illness? How can we not only become more successful in our careers, but also be more accepted for our invisible conditions? How can office leaders make a difference for all their employees? These questions can be an especially tough to parse, but they are extremely important for opening up the dialogue around mental illness in the office.
Erasing Stigma Through Dialogue
Over a lifetime, it’s estimated that the average full-time American worker spends about 90,000 hours at work. It’s no wonder, then, why this year’s theme of Mental Health Awareness Day was focused on the office. Our jobs take up a large portion of our lives, and the environment around us, our work habits, and our outside life can all factor into our mental and physical well-being.
However, it’s rare to hear conversations about mental health while actually in the office. Much of this can be due to the vulnerability of opening up about mental health conditions, but it could also be due to the fact that patriarchal standards still reign supreme in business. The idea of exposing mental illness — as well as emotion or empathy — can be seen as a weakness.
Numerous studies have come to prove this to be false, and in fact honing your emotional intelligence can play a large part in improving a business and can really shine in management. Empathy and communication, in particular, have shown to reduce employee turnover, improve team morale, and increase productivity for individuals and teams.
When discussing mental health, one of the biggest hurdles in addressing it can be the stigmas that exist around these conditions: both social stigmas (those created by society) and self stigmas (those created internally by people who suffer from mental illness). However, some of those stigmas are beginning to change, and much of that is thanks to the people who are brave enough to speak up and be open about it, and to those that have the empathy and patience to listen and learn. Scientific research has also shown that people are more willing to seek out help — via therapy, counseling, or medication — when they can overcome these stigmas.
For those of us that suffer from mental illness, being open about our struggles and our conditions can be inherently powerful. However, it can be difficult to be open if we don’t have a support system in place. On the reverse, having a supportive, empathetic, and kind boss can be a major factor in helping those that suffer feel less stigmatized by their invisible condition. Empathy is also extremely powerful, especially in the office and especially among those in management and leadership positions.
Accepting Mental Health as Physical Health
There’s a reason mental illness is referred to as an “invisible condition.” Although common misconceptions often overlook the body-mind connection, there is plenty of evidence to show that mental illnesses can have a profound effect on the physical body.
However, the general population that doesn’t suffer from mental illness could still suffer from occasional bouts of depression or anxiety brought on by work, or even external circumstances or trauma —. Prolonged exposure to stress can have physical effects as well, which is why it is all the more important to consider allowing mental health days at work.
Sick days allow employees the opportunity to stay at home and recover from the flu or from injuries. Mental health days, on the other hand, allow employees the opportunity to stay at home, relax, rest, and recover. Even for employees that don’t suffer from mental illness, mental health days allow them a chance to step away from the stress of the office and hopefully find ways to practice de-stressing techniques. About 25 percent of Americans agree that work is a main stress-point for them, and stepping away can help them find tranquility, as well as make them better workers for when they do return to the office.
Organizational stress — can result in disengagement if it goes on too long or is unaddressed. Allowing employees the chance to step away from the stress of work can help them feel more appreciated. It can also help them refocus on tasks and be more engaged in the office.
Mental health days go beyond helping those who suffer from mental illness and can help everyone feel better about their work. Examples of this increased emphasis on mental wellness can be seen in European countries where work weeks are shorter, vacation times are longer, and employees are generally happier to be working for their company. If only America could pick up these same practices, maybe our workforce would be better for it.
Changing the Workplace for the Better
Especially in the workplace, Mental Health Awareness Day — where it is frowned upon to discuss these ailments —can help create a dialogue that could lead to lasting changes for everyone.
Being a professional working women who suffers from mental illness can be difficult. Facing the constant stigma of our conditions, as well as the threat of losing our jobs if we’re having a bad day, or even being the subject of ridicule or discrimination because we can’t “showcase” our condition, is a daily worry. There will always be someone to try to put you down for something you cannot control about yourself.
However, our office is no place to face this sort of targeted discrimination, and having a supportive and understanding boss can help prevent sufferers from being alienate at their place of employment. Additionally, raising awareness around the effects of mental illness and stress in the workplace can help carve the paths for healthier lifestyle choices and happier employees.
There are ways to make lasting change in the office and in our lives, but it starts with one simple step: having a conversation. If you suffer from mental illness and feel like your manager will be receptive to discussing your concerns, then maybe it’s time to have that talk. If you’re a manager and want to showcase your support for all your employees, be open about allowing mental health days in the office, and perhaps provide resources for those that need it.
Finally, if you suffer from serious mental illness and are afraid that it will interfere with your work, know that you are not suffering alone. Seek out help, find treatment, and know that although you may have this condition forever, it will not limit the great things you plan to do with your life. You do not have to suffer in silence, and you do not deserve to be stigmatized. Let’s work on making the world a little better for everyone.
Disclaimer: The views and opinions of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com
Becoming a High Performer – Stress Recovery and Renewal Matters!
Career Advice, Career Tip of the Week!By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist
As ambitious, hard working women, we are often not satisfied about what we have achieved at work.
We often feel insecure about giving less than 150% at work for fear of losing ground. And, the truth is, most of us work in very competitive industries that require us to be present for long hours, to travel and to take on massive amounts of responsibility. Would we have it any other way? My guess is if you are reading the glasshammer.com, you are interested in hearing how to have more of everything and have it right now!
However, research shows that sustainable high performance requires the executive to harness stress adequately with the right amount of pace and rest for stress recovery. Doing what you love means being well enough to do it. You are human. No matter how good the set up is at the office and at home, chances are you are a little stressed and a little exhausted. Throw kids in the mix and downtime to recover disappears further.
It is time to talk about that while growth is important in climbing the ladder and breaking the ceiling, renewal is even more important so that you can continue to high perform, learn and grow.
Staying well physically and mentally is now something more and more companies are paying attention to. Executives who understand their own sustainability are more likely to avoid burnout and have better longevity in their careers.
Stress also affects how you show up as a team member, manager or leader. Behaviorally, when under stress, most of us have shortcomings from being snappy, to avoidance of issues that need to be addressed. When you do not realize the stress, as it becomes normalized, then you equally might accept your less than optimal behaviors as normal too.
We have developed a group coaching program for high performing talent, and “insecure overachievers” that creates awareness of how stress is effecting your performance and ultimately hindering your development as an executive. By understanding your own neuroscience and your actual data you can understand how to make real change for your mental and physical health.
We are running a virtual cohort where people are matched in pods to work on sustainable high performance.
If you are “high performing talent” and likely to make Managing Director in the next 12 months then this group could be for you.
There is a cost for the 5 month program and it includes psychometric tests, individual and group coaching.
Write to nicki@evolvedpeople.com if you are interested in being considered for this cohort or to schedule a call to discuss this program for your company.
Voice of Experience: Rebecca Marques, Shearman & Sterling LLP
Voices of ExperienceWhen you’re first launching your career, you often feel like an imposter and can’t envision yourself in the senior position where you will eventually end up, points out Rebecca Marques, newly-elected partner in the Capital Markets practice at Shearman & Sterling.
Even though it’s fun to look back and think, “If I knew then what I know now,” that 20/20 vision wouldn’t really change anything, she says. “So much of what you learn is rooted in the process of growing up,” she says. “You show up at a law firm as your first proper job and you’re just ‘young,’ but there’s no way to skip over that confidence-building part, which only comes with experience.”
For Marques, part of that questioning was rooted in the common archetype you see of a “cookie cutter” mold of a successful executive that many young professionals, especially women, often seek to emulate.
“There’s the chance you might be more successful right off the bat if you conform to that, but it’s not necessarily best for everyone,” she says. In fact, being authentic to herself and her own style is what has contributed to Marques’ success through the specialty she settled on and the career trajectory it set her on.
Finding the Niche That Suited Her Personality
An English and Brazilian national, Marques attended college and law school in the United States and joined Shearman and Sterling’s New York office immediately after law school. She chose capital markets for her summer rotation and decided it was the place for her, entirely based on the personalities of the people working there. “There were some characters in capital markets, and I figured that meant I would be welcome there,” and indeed it ended up being the perfect fit.
Marques appreciates the client-facing and entrepreneurial aspects of her specialty, because it allows her to really get to know a business. She notes that she probably wouldn’t have lasted if she spent her days in front of a screen, churning out papers. “Although the job is legally based, there’s a large element of getting to understand the business, which is unique to capital markets,” she says.
After three years in the New York office, she transferred to London to work in a location where she had ties and wanted to grow roots. When she arrived in London, she was the only female in her group, but she has been able to see that change entirely since she’s been there.
While she’s delighted to have been elected to partnership starting just this January, for her it’s not just about the title, but more the recognition it offers that you’re succeeding in your chosen career. “Even if you know your achievements are being recognized, it’s exciting to have everyone standing behind you officially,” she says.
Transferring Her Skills to Making a Difference
And what brings her even more joy than being named partner is the variety of pro bono work she’s recently undertaken that has been applicable to her particular skills and expertise. This year the social enterprise assignment she headed, which entailed deploying micro grids to deliver power in remote areas of Africa, earned her the title of Lawyer of the Year for her pro bono work at the prestigious 2017 Thomson Reuters TrustLaw Awards.
“I felt like I was at the Oscars,” she says, as it was the last award given of the night, and everyone involved in the nomination process had been pre-interviewed for a video prepared in advance. “I had no idea I had won and then realized they had interviewed the client who had nominated me.”
While Marques sees her job as one of the most rewarding and fulfilling parts of her life, she says it’s important to find other diversions to fill the gaps, as it’s impossible to expect a job to meet all your needs. “In addition to the pro bono work, which I love, I believe that hobbies and other interests are important to help round out your work and life balance.”
Men: It’s Easy to Be a Workplace Ally – Here’s How
Career Advice, Men Who "Get It"Guest contributed by Deborah Pine and Trish Foster
By now it’s no surprise to read that, in 2017, women still face more workplace challenges than men.
According to McKinsey’s 2016 Women in the Workplace report, more than 75 percent of CEOs include gender equality in their top ten business priorities, but progress is still frustratingly slow.
While women can and do make progress alone, more and more companies are discovering a secret weapon to achieve gender balance – male allies. Men, if you truly want to support women in the workplace, there are practical (and relatively easy) steps you can take immediately. Remember that even incremental changes in your behavior might help the women you work with. Here’s how you can help.
Recruit women
In doing so, recognize that some of the best candidates might not come to you – you might need to seek them out. Why? Because while men apply for jobs when they meet 60 percent of the hiring criteria, women wait until they think they’ve met them all. So search for female candidates via LinkedIn, references, internships, and by making sure your hiring committees put women and other diverse candidates on the slate.
Actively promote women and raise their visibility
Encourage them to apply for jobs with more responsibility even if they haven’t met all of the requirements. Why? Because women tend to get promoted based on their accomplishments, men more so based on potential. And a McKinsey/LeanIn.Org report shows that men get promoted at a greater rate than women in the first few years of their careers. Research suggests that women benefit by seeing strong female role models ahead of them in the pipeline. Help make that happen by raising the visibility of women in your organization.
Evaluate performance fairly
Start by being aware of gender bias in performance reviews, since research shows that male performance is often overestimated compared to female performance. In fact, gender-blind studies show that removing gender from performance-based evaluations improves women’s chances of success. Provide constructive criticism and be honest and fair, just as you would with a man.
Be aware of unconscious bias
It’s now well-established that all of us are biased. That’s why so many companies use unconscious or implicit bias training as an essential step in developing men as allies programs. You can tap into plenty of online resources to learn more about implicit bias on your own.
Be a mentor, or better yet, a sponsor, to a woman
Data supports the notion that women who have both female and male mentors get more promotions and higher pay. In addition to mentoring, consider actively sponsoring a woman – remember that sponsors go beyond mentoring by creating tangible workplace opportunities for their protégés. For example, don’t be afraid to take a female colleague to lunch or invite her to an outing, as you would with a male colleague. Professional opportunities often arise in such social settings.
If you have parental leave, take it
We can’t achieve gender parity if women are the only ones taking child-care leave. As Liza Mundy writes in The Atlantic, “The true beneficiaries of paternity leave are women.”
Establish accountability metrics
Set personal diversity and inclusion goals, and encourage your company to establish diversity and inclusion goals for all managers, tying them to reviews and compensation. Accountability produces results!
Don’t ‘manterrupt’ when a woman is speaking
Research shows that men interrupt women far more than they interrupt other men. Actively work to listen more than you speak, and even better, visibly solicit and affirm input from women in meetings.
Be an advocate
Have your female co-worker’s back when she’s not in the room and call out unfairness and bias when you see it. Talk to other men to raise awareness about gender diversity and remember that silence can be misinterpreted as support for the status quo.
Share the housework at home and the office
For women to succeed, they need an equal division of labor at home and at work. Honestly evaluate whether you are sharing chores at home ranging from childcare to cleaning, and do the same at work, raising your hand for the tasks women so often assume, like organizing social events.
Your actions have the potential to make a major, positive difference not just in the lives of your female peers, but in your own life, your work environment, and your company’s success.
Deborah Pine is executive director and Trish Foster is senior program director for the Center for Women and Business at Bentley University in Waltham, Mass.
Disclaimer: The opinions and views of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com
Undervaluing Yourself? Here’s How to Make Sure You Get What You Deserve
Career Advice, Career Tip of the Week!, Guest ContributionGuest contributed by Karen Schoenbart
Do you routinely undervalue your professional worth? Are you afraid to step up and take on new challenges or ask for a promotion or raise because you aren’t sure you’ve earned them? If so, you are definitely not alone.
“Imposter Syndrome” is a term coined in 1978 by clinical psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes. It refers to high-achieving individuals who can’t internalize their accomplishments and persistently fear being exposed as a fraud. According to a recent study in the International Journal of Behavioral Science, up to 70 percent of people feel this way.
The funny thing about Imposter Syndrome is that sufferers are almost always able to meet the requirements of their job, so their fears are actually unwarranted. Nevertheless, overcoming these fears isn’t easy. Follow these steps to gain confidence that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.
Nothing Cures Imposter Syndrome Like Hard Proof
An especially critical strategy for overcoming Imposter Syndrome is to track your accomplishments and communicate them to the people who matter. It is not attractive to brag, of course, but sharing your positive results with your boss and other senior executives will encourage them to support and reward you. When this happens, you will naturally feel like less of an imposter.
It helps to be as proactive as possible, so start a file today. If you get an email from a colleague or a client thanking you or complimenting something you’ve done, add it to the file. If you’ve been given specific goals or objectives, keep them handy and work the list—ensuring you are addressing everything on it. If you need help to accomplish a specific goal, ask. For example, if your boss said you need to hone your presentation skills but you haven’t had a chance to present anything, ask if there is an assignment that will afford you the opportunity. It’s fine to reference your objective and the desire to accomplish it.
A few notes of caution. Your file of accomplishments should be long and comprehensive, but beware of overkill when talking to your manager about them – even if you feel Imposter Syndrome getting the best of you. Choose examples from the file that demonstrate your mastery of a specific task or skill. These examples can also be used when meeting with other senior people in your company or a new manager who can benefit from learning what you have been working on.
Careful tracking and strategic communication will ensure that you have an excellent business case to ask for a promotion or raise, and will hopefully assuage your fears. But what if the worst happens? What if you swallow your apprehension, ask, and are denied anyway? How can you keep from undervaluing yourself then? First, make sure you understand the reasons for the decision. Are there softer skills you are missing, such as communicating tactfully or being assertive in meetings? Ask for specific examples of what you need that you are not currently demonstrating. If nothing is missing, inquire about what is holding you back. A lack of positions at the next level is sometimes a legitimate issue, so you may need to be patient.
Don’t Undervalue Your Offerings Either
A corollary to Imposter Syndrome is underestimating the value of your products or services. Here, you should remember that when you provide something that meets a need of your client or customer, you cannot be afraid to be compensated for it. Have pride in your offering, and know exactly how your client or customer’s life or business will improve as a result of having it. Be willing to walk away, but keep in mind that there are times you might want to be more flexible. For example, you might decrease your price in order to protect an important, long-term relationship. A negotiation that ends in a win/win will reduce your self-doubt and keep you from falling victim to Imposter Syndrome in the future.
Adapted with permission of the publisher, Motivational Press, Inc., from MOM.B.A. Essential Business Advice from One Generation to the Next by Karyn Schoenbart with Alexandra Levit. Copyright (c) 2017 by Karyn Schoenbart. All rights reserved. https://www.amazon.com/Mom-B-Essential-Business-Advice-Generation/dp/1628654597
About the author
KARYN SCHOENBART, author of MOM.B.A. is CEO of The NPD Group, a global provider of information and advisory services to many of the world’s leading brands. She has over 30 years of experience in the market research field, with expertise in identifying and developing new business opportunities and client partnerships.
Schoenbart was named one of the Top 25 Most Influential Women of the Mid-Market by the CEO Connection. She is also the recipient of the Long Island Brava Award, which recognizes high-impact female business leaders, and the Legacy Award from Women in Consumer Technology. Schoenbart is passionate about coaching others to greater levels of achievement. She is a resident of Long Island, NY. To learn more, visit: KarynSchoenbart.com.
Disclaimer: The opinions and views of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com
Fallen off the January Proverbial Wagon Yet?
Career Advice, Career Tip of the Week!The way to make 2018 resolutions stick is to understand your own neuroscience about how you see your goals in action.
Your mind is driving the bus. Take back the wheel!
The rubber meets the road for goal setting when you have behaviors that actually are conducive to reaching those goals. If you find that when you write down a goal your feelings are that of relief for writing it down and espousing it but that’s where it ends, then you need to look at what you are doing or not doing and why this is the case.
For several years, I wrote “Run a 5k race” on my New Year’s resolution list. For several years, I did not run a 5k or any amount of running.
Sound familiar? If like me, you get as far as goal setting but you find you are not doing what it takes and then beating yourself up about it, then I have a solution for you.
First, look at your competing agendas, this is what you tell yourself is the reason why you cannot do x, y, z and in my case, I told myself I didn’t have time to run.
Now, you must ask yourself. What is really stopping me? What is my big assumption here? Do I really not have time? What am I doing that is a ‘boondoggle’ or time suck, that could be used for running time.
So, when you have found time, still you find that it’s not about that, what a surprise! Your big assumptions or implicit beliefs are lurking! Your mind is telling you that you dont have time but in all honestly you are scared of how much it will hurt! What if you cant do it? What if you cant achieve a simple 5k when you used to be a great athlete? True story. But, I ran that 5k last year and continue to run and do many other things by facing my fears, debunking them and giving myself permission to fail and be less than perfect. So whatever your goal is, look at what you are doing behaviorally to achieve it and then what you are not doing. Why are you not doing it? Look at what you tell yourself and the beliefs that you hold that get in your way. Be brave, it is not easy but you can do it.
If your beliefs feel paralyzing then talk to a coach! We can help you goal set and then change your mindset and behaviors to reach your goal.
If you are interested in hiring an executive coach, email nicki@theglasshammer.com directly or visit our sister company www.evolvedpeople.com to book your free, no obligation exploratory chat.
Sexual Harassment: How Can Men Help Prevent it?
Career Advice, Men Who "Get It"Guest contributed by Jim Morris, WMFDP, Chief Curriculum Officer
In our current political and cultural context women are emboldened – on an historically unprecedented level – to call out the toxic behavior of male colleagues.
What many men are now learning about second hand through the news is a reality women have lived with since entering the workforce over a century ago. Now that the floodgates have opened there is a reckoning taking place: As more and more women speak-up about their harassment experience, others feel supported in coming forth with their stories. This has led to a wave of solidarity, where women are also communicating more with each other on how to approach this problem. One example is the 13 million dollar legal fund for women in low-wage jobs, that was recently announced by a coalition of women in the entertainment industry.
Many of the women who are coming forward were offered financial settlements in exchange for their silence. This sends an unmistakable message that their employers were willing to tolerate harassment without real consequence. What would have been the response had these men committed an equally egregious ethical or procedural breach of another type, like misappropriation of funds, or ignoring a safety issue? Would it have been overlooked, swept under the rug, or treated as confidential? Instead of creating organizational cultures that have a true zero tolerance policy for sexual assault or harassment, we’re living in a world where, until now, it’s been acceptable to quietly collude in a cover up if the perpetrator has enough money, status and power to make the issue go away. This is privilege run amok. Proposed legislation in California that would benefit non-disclosure agreements in these settlements is one possible solution.
So how did we get here? One aspect is the cultural conditioning men receive from a very young age, which entails gaining prestige by cultivating a “cowboy” atmosphere that excludes and often diminishes women. This can range from simply favoring men for leadership roles or drowning out female voices in meetings, (labeled “loudership” in a Harvard Business Review article), to outright objectification, harassment or assault. It’s a systemic issue that is bigger than a few bad actors. Though it’s easy to point a finger at the egregious offenders who make headlines, what about the role that other men play in perpetuating the culture that allows this behavior to flourish? This is a time for men to ask ourselves individually how we have contributed to an environment that has allowed a large number of high profile men to engage in this behavior, over the course of careers that often span decades.
One of the more insidious dimensions of this is unconscious bias. Confronting this requires cultivating a mindfulness of the way one’s own culture and identity shapes behavior and perception. It calls for working with discomfort and sitting with those feelings. At White Men As Full Development Partners, we approach unconscious bias by suggesting the real work before us is to better understand our own privilege and the way other factors like gender and racial conditioning impact how we feel about and view each other. For example, white men don’t typically pay as much attention to their appearance at work, and they are rarely judged as being incompetent because of how they dress. Yet we know from research that the perception of a woman’s competence at work is much more connected to their appearance than their male counterparts. Women are under a lot more pressure to literally “look the part” in order to establish credibility at work. (4)
Another skill that’s crucial to develop is the courage to identify problematic behavior, and speak up to disrupt it. This gets back to the importance of fostering an awareness of how perceptions and realities differ depending on different aspects of your identity. Something that might seem innocuous to a man might actually be experienced as intimidating or inappropriate to a woman or member of a marginalized group. Recognizing that everyone has the right to feel safe and valued in the workplace (and beyond) sets the stage for this approach. The idea is not that men are fundamentally flawed, but rather, are in need of some perspective on how other groups experience life in a white male dominated culture.
Though it’s tempting to think this issue can be addressed with a two hour workshop or online learning module, the reality is that it’s an ongoing process and a long-term commitment. The research, however, says that behavior change isn’t fixed by “training” alone; it’s fixed by helping people learn to first courageously examine and then consciously shift their mindsets. Individual behavior change is a lengthy and deeply personal process. The assumption that training will eradicate a culture of collusion and protection isn’t realistic. Instead, our approach is to begin by examining how the power, privilege and status that each of us wields may impact the way we lead and partner with others. You can’t change behavior without shifting mindsets, and there is no ‘quick fix’ when it comes to that work.
We also need to ask ourselves what men can do to help prepare the next generation? What can be taught to children by men (and women) to preempt some of the sexual harassment endemic to our culture? This behavior starts at a young age because boys want to connect and want to gain status with each other, so we need to find ways for them to do that in positive ways, where there’s space to be vulnerable. Traditionally, discussions on sexual harassment have tended to frame this as a “women’s issue,” and changing that perception is crucial to this process. This entails examining the impact this behavior has on men as well as women, and on the success and health of systems we work within and depend on, from the private sector to government and beyond.
About White Men As Full Diversity Partners (WMFDP):
WMFDP is a diversity and leadership development firm founded in 1996 by Bill Proudman, Michael Welp, Ph.D., and Jo-Ann Morris in Portland, Oregon. WMFDP takes an unorthodox approach towards eradicating bias and discrimination in the workplace. Its client list includes Alaska Airlines, Dell, Lockheed Martin, Northwestern Mutual, Rockwell Automation, Chevron Drilling & Completions, The Nature Conservancy, MassMutual, and others.
Disclaimer: The views and opinions of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com
Rising Star: Sue Reager | CEO, Translate Your World
Rising StarsHer strategy after failing? To mope for a few days, then stand up and say to herself, “Okay, was the direction I was traveling worth pursuing, or should I go somewhere else? And if the destination is the same, is there another path to get there?
“It really is true that when you fall down, you just say ‘Drat!,’ and get back up again,” she says, a philosophy that has paved her successful and innovative career path.
A Varied Career, Focused on Finding the Perfect Fit
Reager’s career path has always been one of blazing her own trails, starting with becoming a professional choreographer at age 14. She started college, but midway through began teaching college instead, which she says was her first discovery that it is possible to follow a different path when you use your initiative.
After teaching her second year, she realized that the 10th year would essentially be the same as the first and she needed a new challenge, so she set her sights on a career switch and spent the next 20 years working for major media in 34 cities and 17 countries.
“I was told that it was not acceptable for women to work around the world — — however I went anyway. I would definitely never call those the ‘good old days,’,” she says, noting that was the moment that she learned she could make her own decisions, take care of herself and face the world without fear.
Along the way she discovered that because people do business in their own language, she had to study languages every night — grammar, verb conjugations, pronouns, adjectives – all the idiosyncrasies of various languages. But that can be daunting since it takes three to five years to learn to speak a language well enough to efficiently conduct business.
When she was invited to go to Korea on year 20 of her global jaunt, she realized that she didn’t want to start all over again learning a new language and instead returned to the United States determined to solve the language problem.
Opening Up a World of Possibilities
Her first step was to learn how to code, which allowed her to offer her services in code correction for major tech companies that were localizing applications into other languages, but were finding their code was altering the target language. She learned over time that the developer engineers were all making the same mistakes and that what they coded would never work in Japanese, Korean or other Asian languages. Upon further research, she determined that all of these developers were following what they had learned at the university, and the books were wrong.
That discovery led to her first invention, which was a way to localize extremely complex audio products like telephone systems without touching the code.
Then she began to help the speech industry by providing voices and special recordings that create the phonetic information required to generate text-to-speech technology. Her efforts led to her latest invention that is the successful integration of the great language companies of the world under one “roof,” resulting in truly excellent business applications that create cross-language communication.
It was around age 40 that Reager discovered she had something to offer the world that she had not yet recognized. “I am an inventor with a brilliant mind,” she says, adding that this realization was like a seismic shock. And, as she says, life has been really fun ever since, with a reason to leap out of bed every morning.
Right now her company is pioneering four inventions and three software programs designed to bridge the communication gap and thus enable one person to provide global education, customer service, tech support, medical professional language support and more effective 911 emergency services worldwide in dozens of languages.
“To me it is almost beyond exciting that using our software will allow one teacher to teach in 78 languages through live real-time subtitles,” she says. The company has also created a way for small business to attract and serve customers who speak other languages; in the past only huge companies could effectively expand globally due to the expense of translation and the need for special personnel to be hired to service those customers. Her company’s software takes over that job, enabling a small company to communicate, sell and serve around the world.
Reager’s company adds an additional focus: that of empowering wounded veterans to perform fulfilling jobs, as well as enable those who are deaf or blind to work in business on equal footing. “Our invention is revolutionary in this respect,” she says.
Moreover, they have invented a device called the “Eye-Belt” that is a belt that acts as eyes for blind people, telling them how to maneuver around obstacles. As more features are added, it will also tell the blind more about the person in front of them. “Our goal is to provide a new freedom to people who have been limited in the past,” she says.
A Company Culture Devoted to Equality
One of the reasons Reager believes her company has been so successful is because it is run on the basis of consensus, which is more of a Japanese style of doing business, and means that everyone involved needs to agree on a given direction. Anyone who feels strongly that the direction is wrong is encouraged to fight for their viewpoint, because there is probably a good reason for it.
“The concept of equality permeates our company culture,” she says. “Each voice has equal weight and equal merit, and if one person accidentally tries to overpower another, we simply pull the rug out from under them. We are very honest with each other, and we do not criticize.” Without levels of hierarchy, the lines blur between the “worker bees” and executives, eliminating commands and “royal decrees.”
This equality in the office is a perfect metaphor for the equality they are trying to create by removing language barriers around the world.
Getting What You Want in 2018
Career Advice, Career Tip of the Week!Happy New Year!
Most of us have new resolutions and all of them will rely on a behaviorial change in their essence, as they require action. If you have figured out what you want (and what you don’t want) and have named this as a future state, then congratulations, the first part is done. But, now the goals are on paper, will you behaviorally do what you need to do to really achieve them?
The good news is that you are in charge of your choices.
The bad news is that your unconscious mind can totally hijack best laid plans by creating competing agendas. How does this show up? What saboteurs are lurking? What fears do you harbor that stop you from achieving your goals? Well, subtle behavioral conflict often happens and what you don’t do to meet your goals is worth deeper examination.
Changing or leaving your job is a common example of where you may espouse that you want to change jobs but here you are two years later still in the same spot. Maybe you have been looking, maybe you have even sent out a few resumes, but my bet is that there is truly something within yourself stopping you from doing what you need to do to get what you want. This might look like logic on the surface, like you tell yourself you don’t have time to network or you need more experience to apply. But, the interesting part of all of this is that in reality you are probably holding assumptions and beliefs that are stopping you from actioning your goals. Continuing with the “logic”, the “no time” reason is usually about a fear, and this can be anything from fear of not getting the job, to fear of not performing in the job, to even just a baseline rejection issue as well as many things including fear of what the next workplace culture might be. Sticking with “the devil you know” comes up more than you can imagine for people. Many of my clients are amazing, talented, experienced executives – women and men from different industries and they are also very human. We are all a product of our past experiences and our cultural benchmarks that often scar us from the cradle to the grave with “the way it is.”
Now, that is not to say that systemic factors are not at play, from biased hiring processes to saturation in your marketplace and turbulent external conditions. But, people get hired in up and down markets and it is the internal dialogue that you have with yourself that matters. Mindset work is key, as by understanding your own paradigms and mental models you can truly formulate practical strategies. I say this because I spent significant time in the past several years studying and researching why people fail to execute on their espoused plans from organization diversity plans to individuals who want things to change. The psychology of saying one thing and doing another is fascinating but we all do it to some extent and it happens because of cognitive dissonance or competing agendas propped up by deep implicit beliefs.
So, if you want to get to a different, better, future place than where you are now, please call me for an exploratory chat as we now have a full service sister coaching firm – Evolved People Coaching and we would be happy to find the right coach for you.
Here is to a great 2018!
Voice of Experience: Allison Nathan | Managing Director, Goldman Sachs
Voices of ExperienceOver the years, Goldman Sachs’ Allison Nathan has learned that although you have to be dedicated and proficient in most areas, you don’t have to excel in everything. “You have to focus on your strengths and interests and think creatively about finding opportunities to leverage them,” she says.
Reflecting upon her experience joining the research division, Nathan notes that she was one of the only people on her team that did not have a PhD in economics. However, she soon realized she had other strengths that would differentiate her and allow her to contribute to the group. Connecting the dots across research views proved to be one of them.
“It’s no coincidence that people tend to enjoy doing what they do well,” Nathan says. That knowledge led her to create an entirely new research product that has become a standalone brand.
Parlaying Her Knowledge into a New Product
Nathan joined Goldman Sachs as a first-year analyst in 1998, after earning an MA from the Johns Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies and a BA from Duke University.
Goldman Sachs had long been an aspirational firm for her, so she jumped at an opportunity to join. Since she had always had an interest in geopolitics as well as economics, she joined the commodities research team, which she found to be a great fit for those interests.
After working her way up in commodities research over 14 years, including being named a managing director, she launched a research product called “Top of Mind,” a publication that leverages both internal content from Goldman Sachs research analysts and external content from influential experts. In each issue, she and her team develop content that focuses on a specific market-moving theme, ranging from Fed balance sheet policy to trade wars to bitcoin.
“It was very rewarding to start out on a traditional path and then have the ability to create a unique opportunity that really leveraged my strengths,” she says. “I felt strongly this type of product was something we were missing, and while it was initially difficult convincing some audiences that there would be traction, the series has been consistently well-received for over five years now.”
Indeed, its success has allowed Nathan to expand Top of Mind into a thought leadership “brand,” and she is currently working on a fifth conference that is part of the publication’s evolution. Top of Mind forums are held periodically to bring the publication’s ethos of discussion and debate to life within a conference setting that features roundtable discussions with individuals from Goldman Sachs’ research division. The team also now produces a podcast series. “Offering content in different mediums has been an exciting aspect of the brand’s development,” she says.
Helping Others Build Successful Careers
Nathan has been a beneficiary of the women’s networks she has leveraged throughout her time at the firm. Recently, she has been active in Goldman Sachs’ Women’s Career Strategies Initiative (WCSI), which targets high-performing women associates to provide educational and networking opportunities. Through this program, Nathan has had the privilege of mentoring three women who have all recently been promoted.
She notes that mentoring is a powerful tool, and you should leverage your experience to mentor people who work directly for you as much as those with whom you have an arms-length relationship.
Sometimes it can be easier to work with those who aren’t direct reports, as you can be honest and know it won’t affect a day-to-day relationship, but it’s also important to invest in the women on your team, says Nathan. She also finds that while senior women tend to mentor other women, she encourages them to remember it’s also important to mentor men. “You have as much experience and knowledge and as much to offer junior people as the man sitting next to you,” she says.
While she finds that most women tend to anticipate a struggle with work/life balance, her main message is that you can have it all. “I have two kids and a husband who also works full-time. The key is that if you are good at what you do, you’ll find there are opportunities for people to give you the autonomy you need to achieve that balance.”
Much of her time outside the office is spent with her children, ages 7 and 9, but as they become older and more self-sufficient, she now has additional time to focus on other interests. To that end, she has joined the board of DreamYard, a Bronx-based non-profit that works with children to build pathways to opportunity through the arts. She says of this new experience: “I am excited to increase my involvement in DreamYard and help provide more opportunities for these talented students and their families in the Bronx community.”