How to Mentor Millennials

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millennials-featuredGuest contributed by Sarah Landrum

Having a successful protégé reflects well on you and adds to the progress of professional women everywhere. So mentally brace yourself for the mentor/mentee relationship.

Remember what it was like to be an inexperienced person? Once you are mentally prepared to start molding a successful protégé, you must then prepare yourself for the patience it will take to get started.

Whether or not you had a mentor when you were younger, you can still relate to the feeling of being the new person in the office. As someone who has now been in the grind for years, you may have a tough time knowing where to start with your mentee. Well, think back.

When you were the new person, what qualities did you appreciate in your colleagues? Most likely, you wanted to work with those who:

  • Were patient with you
  • Answered your questions
  • Never treated you in a condescending way
  • Offered their assistance when they sensed conflict or concerns
  • Took a genuine interest in your work and well-being
  • Helped you to reach your goals
  • Took notice of things you did well, and made helpful suggestions on things they saw that could be improved

Now that you’re on the other side of the mentor/mentee relationship, you can make good use of these memories.

With your mentee, discuss expectations — both yours and theirs. Set goals. Pay attention to their progress. Give feedback. Be supportive. Offer advice, but also listen. And, most importantly, take a genuine interest in their work and well-being.

Appreciate Generational Differences

More than likely, your near-future mentees are going to be millennials. Like every generation, millennials have their own set of concerns, indignations, interests, goals and talents.
Millennials are generally tech-savvy, environmentally conscious, insistent upon equal rights, adventurous, innovative and generally more interested in finding meaningful work than the largest paycheck or the best job security they can get.

However, despite the differences between millennials and non-millennials, all of the millennial-specific qualities can be channeled toward the greater good of a business. It’s up to you, as a mentor, to find the benefits these qualities have to offer, and to guide your mentees to apply them correctly.

Parting Thoughts

No matter who your mentee is — man or woman, intern or new hire, millennial or baby boomer — it’s up to you to help them succeed. The best way to do this is to understand what it means to be a mentor. It takes patience, dedication and a genuine investment in their progress.

If you decide to take on the role of the mentor, embrace the qualities that make you uniquely successful and help your mentee to do the same. And, as you learn and grow alongside your protégé, know that you’re doing your part for the advancement of professional women.

(The views and opinions of Guest Contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com)

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The Gender Pay Gap

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This month we celebrate Equal Pay Day. Take a look at these informative Pay Gap articles previously published on theglasshammer.

This week we hit “Equal Pay Day” on Tuesday, a day which symbolizes the extra days women must work to make the same salary as her male peers did last year. According to the Demystifying The Gender Pay Gap survey by Glassdoor, the biggest myth about the gender pay gap is that it doesn’t exist at all, as 7 in 10 employees across seven countries assumed men and women received the same pay for the same work. But even when narrowed down to an apples-to-apples comparison within companies, researchers found a significant gender gap exists.

Closing the investment gap for women as well as the better- documented pay gap needs to happen. What is the investment gap? And why are most women, even highly paid professional women still missing out? Sallie Krawcheck just wrote a post about the cost of not realizing what we are missing financially by not investing properly on LinkedIn.

money money moneyYou don’t need to work in a male dominated occupation to find your pay check weighs light relative to your male colleagues – particularly, if you’re in business.

In March 2015, the US Census Bureau released the latest pay statistics from 2013, including median earnings by detailed occupation, showing that full-time working women earn 78.8% of what full-time working men do. The census data revealed that across 342 occupations, women (barely) out-earn men in only nine.

Narrow the Hidden Executive Pay Gap Starting Now

Woman-on-a-ladder-searchingWomen reaching for the top rungs of the executive ladder will want to watch for the hidden pay gap. As Bloomberg writes, “Even top female workers can’t catch a break when it comes to pay inequality.”

As women move to senior ranks, the gender pay gap widens. Your best career management play? Begin closing it now.

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OP-Ed: What Happened After International Women’s Day 2017?

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Nicki-Gilmour-bioBy Nicki Gilmour

There was a flurry of activity for international women’s day this year, observationally more than usual and that could be correlated with the determination of some to deny women equality in a fairly overt way or it could just be a coincidence. You decide. There were hashtags such as #Beboldforchange, there were marches and a strike concept (A day without women), there was a designated color to wear (red). What does it all mean? And where are we really at?

Well, let’s have a quick recap of a small slice of life regarding NY based IWD activities as a microcosm for awareness of first world issues on this day which is mostly about third world women issues. However, in many ways IWD represents why we are going in circles with diversity and gender work.

Statestreet erected a statue of a little bronze girl staring in a defiant manner at the bull of wall street. That famous icon that can be construed in all sorts of ways, but mostly it is a bull representing good markets (bull markets). Next, some young white idiotic man accosted the statue in a suggestive sexual manner totally reinforcing in part why it was there in the first place. Backlash to this surprised me as not so long ago this would have been considered a drunken rite of passage so maybe we are making progress or maybe we are just more citizen journalist than ever. Then, in the spirit of no good deed goes unpunished and what was a good social statement from Statestreet (and marketing for the gender index SHE) quickly turned into curiosity of just how many women they have in high places. Also, the statue has now been removed as it was always a temporary erection, if you will pardon the pun when perhaps we should be asking why it couldn’t stay there more permanently if we are to remain mindful of the lack of parity?

Are we getting anywhere?

It seems progress is definitely not linear to anyone really looking at the macro side of it. In the myth of the ideal worker research by Catalyst, we see what we know to be true, the tactics that work for men to advance doesn’t not apply to women necessarily in equal measure and the piece in HBR back in 2010 interestingly points out the importance of one’s early managers.

So how can we have conversations that matter? Conversations that progress things and that engage people and then create actual actions? Beyond the politeness and avoidance of things that matter in an increasingly weird and fragmented world where everything is accused rightly or wrongly to be politicized, how do we talk to each other?

The first step that we need to take, I believe, is to recognize there isn’t equality everywhere at work currently. I am not talking about society at large, instead this is a focused narrower conversation as it pertains to executives and professionals but certainly some of this applies more widely without doubt.

To recognize a lack of level playing field, sometimes you have to have awkward, painful conversations with people who may have differing viewpoints than you. It does take bravery to have bold conversations at work as there is an element of risk and that is usually on the less powerful individual in that bold conversation. On International Women’s Day 2017, Catalyst held their annual conference and awards dinner while revealing their new initiative called the Catalyst CEO Champions For Change stating it to be transformational for diversity and inclusion because more than 40 high-profile CEOs and top leaders, many from the Catalyst Board of Directors, have pledged to do even more to accelerate diversity, inclusion and gender equality within their organizations. Curious to the mechanics of how this will actually work and impact real change for the women in the trenches, Catalyst assures me that this is different due to the fact that the companies that have signed on will share data on the representation of women in their workplaces with Catalyst, so that collective progress can be tracked, analyzed and reported. They state that,

This (initiative) is a good example of companies understanding that there is a reason to think we might have an issue that can actually be solved.”

Krista Brookman, Vice President, Inclusive Leadership Initiative, Catalyst weighs in on the importance of leadership when it comes to diversity,

“Leaders can ensure that women are accelerating in their workplaces by committing to visibility, access, and equity. That means that women have access to high quality mentors and sponsors for women, that women are considered for “hot jobs” – high profile, high visibility, and international assignments, that women have access to the unwritten rules (generally unspoken workplace norms and behaviors), that leaders are intentional and about making women’s achievements visible, that leaders interrupt bias and stereotypes in their choices and decision-making, and that leaders understand, develop and practice inclusive leadership skills and behaviors with men and women on their teams.

Thirdly, there has to be action, execution and accountability in the middle ranks and this is often a tricky factor in the success of diversity work and getting managers involved rather than handing them HR policy is the way to go.

Does the solution start with you and I?

A panel at the conference discussing how to engage in conversations about Gender, Race and Ethnicity in the workplace stuck me as interesting as intersectionality is often where the wheels come off and division of people happens based on social identities, wealth, and life experiences amongst other stuff. I caught up with Jennifer Allyn, Diversity Strategy Leader for PwC in the US, after the panel that she just had sat on and she recounted how bold leadership is needed to create a culture where dialogue can happen. Jennifer comments how PwC recognized that you cannot just ignore tragic current events as people carry that around emotionally and have feelings about issues either way. She states,

“After the spate of police shootings last year, our CEO, Tim Ryan sent a message asking everyone in the firm to have conversations with their teams about what happened. It was an explicit invitation to talk about race and the trust gap in society.

Tim Ryan’s stance on tackling tough issues is not run of the mill but neither is his appointment of the most diverse leadership team in the firm’s history consisting of four white women, three women of color, four men of color, and an openly gay partner on the team.

Jennifer continued that it is best to assume your colleagues have good intentions because “being self righteous isn’t helpful in a difficult conversation”. She states,

“If your goal is to learn from someone else’s perspective, the conversation has to be reciprocal. You have to do more listening than talking. The panel moderator Dnika J. Travis, PhD, Vice President and Center Leader, Catalyst Research Center for Corporate Practice said it best – ‘you take fear with you’ and the biggest humility is understanding that other people don’t have the same experiences that you do.”

There is nothing to fear but fear itself and if there is an action to take away from International’s women’s month perhaps it is to spark up a conversation with someone who has opposing views and just hear them.

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Behaviors That Build Confidence

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Female BossGuest Contributed By Melissa Greenwell

I’ve spent decades watching both men and women climb the corporate ladder to build highly successful careers. I have watched and listened carefully to understand the actions that enabled these people to be called out from the crowd. They weren’t all good-looking or even charming. If there was one single common thread it was confidence. Successful leaders behave in ways that caused them to be noticed, heard, and remembered. Admittedly, slightly generalizing an entire gender, I’ve observed that men, more frequently than women, seem to garner the confidence of a crowd more quickly. I believe that is because they more frequently demonstrate confidence-building behaviors. And I believe women can get the same result by more frequently demonstrating some of those behaviors as well.

This is not to say that as a women, you should act like a man or that you should not be your authentic self. In fact, you’ve got to be your authentic self. You are unique. Your thoughts are unique. The trick is delivering your uniqueness effectively. If you practice a few basic rules, you will deliver.

Speak First.

Yes, first, not last. It doesn’t matter if your idea is not fully baked, with all of the possible pitfalls identified. If you wait until everyone else’s ideas are heard, while you refine yours or, worse, come up with a reason why yours is not a good idea, one of two things will happen: You will never be heard, because you’ll never get the chance to speak, and the conversation will move on. You will never be heard because someone else said it first.

If you have trouble getting the attention of the room when you need it, there are a few techniques you can try. It starts with body language. Be confident. Don’t slump in your seat. Sometimes you need to interrupt. Some of you may think of it as rude. Call it what you will. If people talk over you and around you while you’re trying to get a word in, you have to be a little bold. Lean forward on the table, stand up, move to the front of the room. Speak concisely and with energy. Use humor. It helps people remember what you said. Don’t pause. If you pause too often or for too long, someone else will take the opening and run you off track.

Let’s talk about strategic use of profanity. I believe that there are moments—and they should be rare—when the occasional use of profanity can get the attention of your audience in a good way. Use at your discretion and only when the culture allows it. I am talking “hell” as in “what the hell” and words of that nature.

Stop Apologizing.

Stop qualifying your statements. Every time you preface your thought with an apology or a qualifier, you take power away from yourself and give it to the men in the room (because there are likely more men in the room). Stop it! You don’t really believe it when you say you’re not sure if it’s a good idea, right? You’re just being polite, because somehow you think the message will be better received if you apologize for it first. Let’s think about that for a minute. When was the last time that anyone trying to persuade you to buy anything apologized for their product? “I’m sorry, this car is a piece of shit, but I think you should buy it. Our consulting services might not be the best in class, but we will get the job done good enough.” Really?

Make Time for Face-to-Face Communication.
In this ever-connected, 24-7 world, it is easy to do all of your communicating electronically. And why not? Women (again totally generalizing) are such pros at multitasking, so why shouldn’t we carry on a couple of conversations at once?

For women who love to multitask—and many of us do—we often miss opportunities to demonstrate our thought leadership and therefore miss opportunities to be seen as a leader, by trying to do too much at once. Face-to-face communication is not always convenient, but it’s nearly always well worth it. Successful people understand this. They know it’s important to build relationships with those who are important to them, because relationships are the most critical element in influencing others. Women have to be effective at influencing both genders. Our communication style and method has everything to do with that.

About the author

MELISSA GREENWELL is the author of MONEY ON THE TABLE: How to Increase Profits Through Gender-Balanced Leadership (Greenleaf Book Group, January 2017). She is Executive Vice President and Chief Operating Officer of national retailer The Finish Line, Inc. You can learn more at www.melissa-greenwell.com

Disclaimer: The views and opinions of Guest Contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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The Juggle: 3 Tips to Get Stuff Off Your Plate

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 By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Pyschologist

juggle

Image via Shutterstock

Unless you are a fully fledged workaholic ( I used to be one and I know many), you may want to work a little less and do a little more of just about everything else. With the exception of chores which are few people’s idea of fun.

So, how it is possible to live and love in an urban place, give it your all and maybe just maybe have time for other areas of your life, be it having children or not having children. I say that with caution as people get derailed quickly and fall into 2 camps when it isn’t about that division it is about the unification of the truth that we all do work more than ever.

Here are my three tips to get you closer to nirvana.

TIP 1: What tasks at work are non crucial and can be delegated, dumped or reframed to matter more strategically and therefore become worth doing?

TIP 2: How can you break cultural norms in a ‘face time” environment to show that results orientated work and productivity are winners?

TIP 3: At home, what life hacks can you apply to boring admin and chores to outsource or reduce them? Get a system or actual people involved to help you free up your time to live the dream. If you feel your other half needs to do more, tell me what they need to do and when as maybe they just do not know?

Most importantly, it is worth your while to step out of the weeds and look at the big picture – what do you want personally and professionally to happen in the next 24 -36 months?

Best of Luck

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The Importance of Knowing What You Want

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Guest contributed by Tracey Carr, Executive Coach and CEO of Mi Purpose


I don’t know about you but my life is mad, crazy, busy running a complex business and being the best single Mum that I can be while also taking care of my health, having fun and taking control of my financial destiny.None of us have time for wasting our lives on distractions and yet it is so easy to be distracted in this world of information overload and being constantly available through our devices.

It takes discipline to focus on important activity that takes you toward your goals instead of being distracted by everybody else’s demands.

Our research shows that less than 1 person in every 100 people knows what they want, and guess what, most people get just that – a destination they didn’t want or choose!

How do I choose my own destiny?

The simple answer: scheduling!

Or rather, the process of scheduling, which I like to call “Dump, Chunk and Do”; it’s a fairly simple 3 step process that requires about 10 to 20 minutes a day. Allow me to explain:

Step 1: Dump

As the saying goes, the one thing constant in life is change. Because of change, our priorities change; things that were once important and/or urgent get moved to the back-burner and other “nice to have” tasks suddenly pop into the forefront of our attention. Because of this, we need a system to make sure that we can keep track of all the tasks in our heads without losing them.
This is where Dumping comes into play. Having a capture list is like a traditional “to do” list, but it allows you to clear the mental space and focus those tasks and aha’s into an inventory. Having such an inventory of tasks can and will grow over time and can seem like a lot to manage. Luckily, there’s Step 2 that avoids the problem of long static task lists or desks covered in post-it-notes.

Step 2: Chunk

Chunking is the means by which we organize our task inventory. I prefer to place tasks into logical grouping or categories that way i find that can I focus on the various aspects of my personal and professional life in one place without the stress of having to remember where ‘that’ list or reminder is.

Step 3: Do

Once Chunked, identify those important/urgent tasks that need to get done immediately.

For each of your categories, prioritise your top 5 – 10 items/tasks and then schedule those tasks on the day that you want to do them. Chunk the colours together into groups so that you can focus on one category at a time rather than randomly flitting from one task to another. (you can do this on paper, through Microsoft Outlook, Google Calendar or my personal favorite is the one I developed myself : Mi Purpose

Why group colours together in my calendar system?

You will be more effective if you practice scheduling your energy as suggested. It takes a different kind of energy to work on finance than it does working on long term visions and goals. This also allows you to be flexible and save time and as you have now already categorised your tasks it should be easy.

For instance, imagine that you are planning a party or sporting event and you have Chunked some ideas into one of your categories and scheduled those “Do” tasks for next Wednesday in your calendar. As you think of other ideas for the event, you can simply refer to your calendar of Do tasks (use the colour coding wherever possible) and drop or add new tasks as needed.

This will give you peace of mind that you are in control, remaining spontaneous and safe in the knowledge that you will complete everything at the most efficient time by scheduling and controlling your own life.
The trick is align to your vision and goals to prioritise your work flow against the pressure of too many demands and that way you decide what matters most in your life!

In conjunction with Tracey Carr and Best Year Ever, The Glass Hammer readers are being invited to take advantage of this unique opportunity with a special one-time offer to get Mi Purpose FREE FOR LIFE for one small pledge during this 30-day campaign on Indiegogo

Tracey Carr is the Founder & CEO of Mi Purpose SAAS, Executive Coach, International Speaker and Mom to 3 girls

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Checking Your Own Biases Around Gender In Your Career

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 By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

Image via Shutterstock

 

Are you a sexist woman? You might be wondering where I am going with this but in ten long hard years of working on gender equality, the one thing that has amazed me most is the level of sexism against women perpetrated by women. How do you know if you are harboring biases against women? If you are, you are probably unaware if you do have biases and maybe on a very unconscious level you believe in deeply engrained gender roles without ever looking at this.

This of course will seem odd to you as a working professional women who may even espouse that you are all about seeing women advance. Are you brave enough to look at your deepest held beliefs? It is a journey, and scary at times but one that can help you understand which paradigms are really aligned with your values and which have been handed to you and upon inspection do not take you to where you want to go or who you want to be.

It is a spectrum to fall on, this sexist thing. No one is exempt from having some bias for and against everything from who you work with to seemingly unimportant things such as whether you prefer watching sports played by women or men and then which is the better version according to you. The constructs behind the “why” is really the piece that can be examined, and if the “why” lines up for you, then great, but more than half of the time, as a coach and a psychologist, I find that not to be the case.

Do you believe that men are more leaderlike than women? In a 50 year long, regularly updated case study called “Think Manager, think Male” on which groups of men or women (by the way imaginary group not actual people) are believed to be more leaderlike rated by their assigned traits. Even when young women answer the survey, they vote straight white men as more competent and productive than themselves. So, you tell me where does that leave the “the lean in”, you go girl mantra? Mind blowing isn’t it? Not to me, I can totally see that the lack of progress being made is in part due to the mental models the patriarchy has given most of us. The mind blowing part to me is that if once people examine it and see no value in keeping it that they keep it anyway out of inertia or fear of change.

The other area to see where you are or others is to talk about children. If you hear yourself or others applying different standards of behavior to your girl children and boy children, then you can be sure that you are taking that into work with you too and as a bonus setting them up for carrying on that belief too.

No judgment from me, my job is not to agree to disagree or feel aligned with your values. My job is to ask you the question – now that you have looked deeper into how do you feel about ensuring women and men are treated with the same benchmark when it comes to leading, working and being promoted fairly after reading this post?

What is your role in creating the world you espouse to believe in at work and at home?

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Women in Tech: Climbing the Ladder

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Woman-on-a-ladder-searchingGuest Contributed by Evan Fraser

Working in the tech industry can be incredibly exciting. It is a fast-paced industry with seemingly unlimited potential. Technology also has one of the smallest income gender gaps, high work schedule flexibility and generous pay in many positions. While that draws many women down this career path it is still a male dominated industry which makes climbing the corporate ladder a challenging task. These 6 tips will help you navigate your way to the top.

1. Be Assertive.

The best way to learn in the tech field is to jump in and build things. As a woman you will often have to fight for that right. Moving up the ranks will not come naturally, you need to be assertive and make your own place within the company. Being a dominant and assertive woman in technology can be a struggle as it is often interpreted as bossy or aggressive by male colleagues. Don’t let that deter you from taking the lead. Sheryl Sandberg has had incredible success in her life and has dealt with this issue throughout her career. She addressed this issue in a interview by saying “Every woman I know, particularly the senior ones, has been called too aggressive at work. We know in gender blind studies that men are more aggressive in their offices than women. We know that. Yet we’re busy telling all the women that they’re too aggressive. That’s the issue.”

2. Don’t be intimidated.

There will always be people that know more than you. This is a good thing as it will help you learn and grow. Don’t be intimidated by those with more experience or lots of technical know-how. It’s very easy to feel out of place in a boardroom, especially within a big technology company. Never be afraid to ask questions if you have problems understanding, you will not be the only one in the room.

3. Choose your employers well.

Lots of companies in Silicone Valley are progressive and forward thinking. Many aim to create environments that encourage creativity and efficiency but there are still major differences in how these companies are run. Be sure to do your research on the companies you apply to. Your environment will be a big factor to your personal success so look for progressive and diverse leadership teams with a product that you are passionate about. This will allow your career to flourish and grow.

4. Don’t create your own glass ceiling.

The term ‘glass ceiling’ is often used in regards to outside factors creating boundaries for women in business. This is a difficult issue women have had to deal with for generations. Therefore, it is important to avoid constructing any additional, self-restricting boundaries. Sometimes the boundaries we create for ourselves are easily overlooked and often more harmful than external factors. Believe in your talents and skills. Avoid creating your own boundaries by limited thinking and be sure to set smart goals. Do not consider yourself ineligible for any role within a company, think big and make your strengths work for you.

5. Learn to negotiate.

Negotiating is a part of business. Women and men in management positions expect it when dealing with employees, clients or partners. You need to go in ready to negotiate and prepared to articulate what you want. Avoiding a negotiation will leave you with less than you deserve. Be assertive, but also listen to understand. Being able to listen to the wants and ideas of the person you are negotiating with will make them more willing to meet your needs. Be concise and reasonable in your negotiation but do not be afraid to ask.

Also, keep in mind that negotiation is a skill that needs to be learned. It will help you in many aspects of your life so make the effort to learn about the subject as much as you can. Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher is a great read on the skill of negotiating.

6. Find a mentor.

This piece of advice will apply to you whether you are 20 years old starting out your career or 55 and looking to retire. Mentorship is something anybody can benefit from. People that have gone down a path you wish to follow can give you valuable advice and help nudge you in the right direction when you reach a crossroads. Finding an experienced woman in technology would be ideal as they will be able to share tips on how to deal with the struggles women face in the industry. Once you have gained experience, help out younger women by sharing your knowledge. Being a mentor can teach you as much as having a mentor.

Find a mentor in your area.

women in tech infographic

Evan Fraser is a writer and advertising expert with over 10 years of experience in Marketing. He is passionate about tech and loves traveling the world to taste international foods. When he is not writing you can catch him playing sports or listening to some 50’s Blues.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions of Guest Contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer

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Responsibility – Tick, But Resource Control is Zero

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Slowing downBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

A bad work day can consist of a scenario when you do not manage the team but are on the hook for delivery of the product. Sound familiar? Literally, this happens everyday to many people and it is a problem that creates issues and looks like a lack of skill and efficiency because team A promised the client something but they had no control over team B actually building the product.

Would you take the responsibility of protecting the free world, if you were not allowed the nuclear codes? Most of you will say no to this yet I see so many people taking on outrageous projects and knowingly being on the hook for things that they literally have zero control over the delivery of. How can you avoid this seemingly inevitable situation?

A good case in point is diversity work.

I see a lot of great women heading up women’s networks and being tasked with creating a bigger pipeline of women in the firm. Unless you have serious formal hiring capabilities as your new day job or the ability and full power to rework all the talent processes in the firm plus all the time in the world and renumeration to do it, then why would you say yes to this? From a transformative outcome frame, you should say no since this has no resource or execution control attached to it.

Unless, the goal is advocacy in which case that is fair enough as advocacy is important but rarely formally transformative. Advocacy is what men do every single day for each other so getting them to do it for you is a strong step in the right direction as is getting women to stop burying each other to protect the patriarchy (which runs deep as we know in recent times).

Also, really good development that understands the nuances of being different to the blueprint is never wasted- train and educate as you go in these networks if formally this is not an option (arguably it should de organized and paid for elsewhere but it is often not the case). A network can be a good container to supply unique content to certain audiences who potentially face shared challenges that are systemic in nature.

Remember, only you know what you want to spend time and energy on and how to create goals that are reachable. It is worth thinking about activity versus productivity and outcomes since you all have lives and goals inside and outside of work. Reduce stress by aligning your responsibility and authority on tasks that become the sum of your job!

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach to help you navigate your career then email Nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com for further informatiom

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Raising Aspirations: When I Grow Up I Want To Be

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mother-being-a-role-model-to-daughter-featuredBy Nneka Orji

What do you want to be when you grow up? For some of us, this is a question to which we haven’t yet arrived at an answer. However as children, many of us had a view albeit evolving as we progressed through teenage years and then young adulthood; an engineer, a ballet dancer, a pop star, an astronaut, or perhaps the most popular childhood dream jobs in the UK – a doctor or nurse (according to a YouGov survey, 1 in 10 adults in the UK aspired to be a doctor or nurse in their childhoods, followed closely by a footballer and teacher). The sky is the limit…but is this really the case for everyone? Or do gender and societal expectations start limiting aspirations in childhood? The short answer – despite a notable shift in behaviours – is yes.

The London School of Economics and University of Madrid published research into how parental behaviours influence children’s perception of gender as they go through preference formation. The study found that children’s motivation and self-esteem, and thereby their job preferences and ambitions, are greatly influenced by parental “sex-typical behaviours” and their socioeconomic resources. Those children who deem only certain jobs appropriate because of their gender are more likely to go into sex-typical careers, however girls with high levels of motivation and both boys and girls with high self-esteem were both more likely to go against societal norms and choose sex-atypical jobs. It doesn’t stop there; girls who aspired and therefore joined stereotypically female jobs were more likely to earn less because of the lower wages which persist across female-dominated roles.

These findings have implications on our approach to addressing gender parity and those who continue to push for parity in the workplace have much to consider. Is there merit in shifting more focus and investment to the “preference formation” stage when prospective employees are in the process of developing their preferences and aspirations, rather than later when aspirations are almost fully formed?

Some businesses are already actively engaging with the younger generation through initiatives with schools – addressing gender equality as well as social mobility. Organisations such as Inspiring the Future and Teach First are connecting professionals with schools and teachers to facilitate this dialogue around aspirations, and providing a platform for children to engage with role models – a critical factor in shaping aspirations. MIT economist Esther Duflo whose research found that role models had a direct impact on ambitions, described the role model effect in an interview: “Seeing women in charge persuaded parents and teens that women can run things, and increased their ambitions. Changing perceptions and giving hope can have an impact on reality.”

Introducing role models into the lives of young children doesn’t just come through family and professionals connected formally. We don’t always have direct access to role models who can inspire and encourage us along the journey, however entrepreneurs Francesca Cavallo and Elena Favilli believe that storytelling can be an effective tool. Rather than being surrounded by the traditional tales of trapped princesses and saving knights, parents and teachers should be sharing real stories such as those in their book “Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls”, detailing the lives of past and present female role models – including Malala Yousafai and Serena Williams. Both girls and boys are able to see beyond the traditional sex-typical roles, and can reflect the stories and lessons from the successful women in their thinking as they develop their career aspirations and later into the workplace.

The power of storytelling in influencing and inspiring others has been widely discussed, but where possible, we must continue to provide platforms to give girls and women direct access to role models. A paper published by the Chartered Management Institute (CMI) in 2014 pointed to the need for a “role model revolution”. Women continue to look for role models who inspires other, stands up for their beliefs, build confidence in others, make a difference to society, and demonstrate that they are able to overcome challenges. Acknowledging that no one person can provide all of this, 86% of the survey respondents were looking to develop relationships with more than one individual.

Yet only 55% of those surveyed by CMI said there are enough role models across their organisations and industries – even though 81% saw the benefits of role models in raising aspirations. CMI also asked survey participants to name their most inspirational role models; of the top 10 listed, only 2 were women and have now passed away (Margaret Thatcher and Mother Teresa).

We all know female role models exist and many of them continue to engage successfully with both women and men in the workplace and before. However we all have more to do:

  • Talk about your successful female colleagues and friends so others know they exist and the great work they do
  • Share these success stories with children and young adults by engaging with schools and local communities – waiting until they are 16 isn’t benefiting anyone
  • Lead by example and put yourself forward as a role model – you too can inspire

This isn’t an action list just for women; men also have a role to play – both in the workplace and at home. Assistant Professor Alyssa Croft’s research found that those fathers who not only talked about gender equality but also demonstrated it in sharing household responsibilities were more likely to have daughters who aspired to more sex-neutral or male-dominated jobs.

If we truly want to remove the need for the multiple gender-focused diversity networks and reports, and see the end of headlines such as “without action gender pay gap won’t close until 2069”, we must each take responsibility for positively influencing how the next generation develop their aspirations so that the sky really is the limit.

In the words of Albert Einstein, “setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.” It’s not just about talking the talk, but also walking the walk.

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