Responsibility – Tick, But Resource Control is Zero

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Slowing downBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

A bad work day can consist of a scenario when you do not manage the team but are on the hook for delivery of the product. Sound familiar? Literally, this happens everyday to many people and it is a problem that creates issues and looks like a lack of skill and efficiency because team A promised the client something but they had no control over team B actually building the product.

Would you take the responsibility of protecting the free world, if you were not allowed the nuclear codes? Most of you will say no to this yet I see so many people taking on outrageous projects and knowingly being on the hook for things that they literally have zero control over the delivery of. How can you avoid this seemingly inevitable situation?

A good case in point is diversity work.

I see a lot of great women heading up women’s networks and being tasked with creating a bigger pipeline of women in the firm. Unless you have serious formal hiring capabilities as your new day job or the ability and full power to rework all the talent processes in the firm plus all the time in the world and renumeration to do it, then why would you say yes to this? From a transformative outcome frame, you should say no since this has no resource or execution control attached to it.

Unless, the goal is advocacy in which case that is fair enough as advocacy is important but rarely formally transformative. Advocacy is what men do every single day for each other so getting them to do it for you is a strong step in the right direction as is getting women to stop burying each other to protect the patriarchy (which runs deep as we know in recent times).

Also, really good development that understands the nuances of being different to the blueprint is never wasted- train and educate as you go in these networks if formally this is not an option (arguably it should de organized and paid for elsewhere but it is often not the case). A network can be a good container to supply unique content to certain audiences who potentially face shared challenges that are systemic in nature.

Remember, only you know what you want to spend time and energy on and how to create goals that are reachable. It is worth thinking about activity versus productivity and outcomes since you all have lives and goals inside and outside of work. Reduce stress by aligning your responsibility and authority on tasks that become the sum of your job!

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach to help you navigate your career then email Nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com for further informatiom

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Voice of Experience: Sharmila Karve, Global Diversity Leader, PwC India

sharmila karveBy Nicki Gilmour

Sharmila Karve is a self proclaimed “lifer” at PwC having begun her career in the Mumbai office as an intern in 1985. Sharmila says she has always been people and client focused and she got her first foray into leadership when she was one of the first females admitted as a Partner in 1997. Sharmila cites her client focus as the reason she could stay the course and keep advancing in her career and the firm through good and bad times in the Indian market. In 2009, she became the Territory Assurance Leader, India. After a successful stint as the Assurance leader she was appointed as the Head of Risk in 2012.

What experience teaches

The expertise she has acquired over years of working with a diverse set of clients has helped her deal with complex situations. As part of this journey she has successfully interacted with stakeholders both internal and external including regulators. Her biggest piece of advice for readers managing their career is “Be truthful and direct when dealing with difficult situations”.

The excitement of a new challenge

Early this year, Sharmila Karve took on the Global Diversity Leader role and is now a part of the PwC Global Leadership Team. She is using this opportunity to share her experience and the experiences of various others to empower people across the PwC network of firms. She says: “This role is challenging and we need to have a broader outlook to welcome each day with an open mind. There is no book that you can refer to on the rules, it is about listening.”

She is no stranger to understanding how to change the DNA of a culture having accomplished this in other aspects and she knows that her next challenge is ultimately to help people succeed. She comments of her upcoming diversity and inclusion challenge: “I would like to see how fast we can move the needle. How can we create the right support to further help both men and women be great leaders. Specifically how we can have more men engaged to drive the change. I think this mission is about getting people to share their thoughts with an open mind.”

When asked about how to empower women at work, she firmly believes that it is very important that women ask for what they want. She talks about having the confidence ‘To say NO at work or at home and not feel guilty about it’. Also to truly address the matter, it is important for the men to not assume what a woman might want based on their own ideas and experiences. She gives a very good example that often male managers might presume that a female on their team might not want to travel due to having young kids. She is adamant on her message that men and anyone else who is picking a team should be asking what individuals want to do and to ask a diverse cross section of people to join their team for optimal success.

As Global Diversity Leader she recognizes that gender is just one part of diversity and she states that one of her goals is to ensure that other diversity issues are equally explored and that data sets can be built on her watch. One of the many priorities Sharmila will be driving to accelerate change, involves disrupting the diversity trends of PwC’s experienced hires. In this regard she is very excited to executive sponsor PwC’s gender inclusive research project, the findings of which were released in their Winning the fight for female talent report on International Women’s Day.

On Work and Life

When asked about the idiosyncrasies of local country culture as part of the diversity challenge, Sharmila immediately gets that working mothers have the most shared yet separate challenges depending on the country that they reside in. She acknowledges that the US for example has daycare support when the Asian market leans more on family structures. She comments: “I myself took time out from 1991- 1994 to have and raise my daughter. I truly think people should do what is right for them and what makes them happy. Get a support structure and ask for support when needed. You don’t need to be a superwoman. In India our support structure includes family so I often joke be friends with your mum and mum-in-law as you never know when you will need their help and support.”

Sharmila relays that speaking up is often the answer as most managers will understand the human factor. She comments, “Fair leaders will understand that especially in global roles that rotating the early morning phone calls for example through time zones should be an option. And of course, technology makes work flexibility easier than ever before. We need sustainable careers for everyone”.

When relocating to other countries, Sharmila also recommends knowing the local norms but retaining your ethnic identity so that the benefits of diverse thinking is not lost.

In her spare time

Sharmila travels extensively and enjoys interesting terrain, joking she wants to see the world while her knees still let her. She spends time with her husband who is a Naval officer, her daughter Sanjana who is training to be a veterinary surgeon and Cara and Scamp, her spoilt and pampered pets.

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Raising Aspirations: When I Grow Up I Want To Be

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mother-being-a-role-model-to-daughter-featuredBy Nneka Orji

What do you want to be when you grow up? For some of us, this is a question to which we haven’t yet arrived at an answer. However as children, many of us had a view albeit evolving as we progressed through teenage years and then young adulthood; an engineer, a ballet dancer, a pop star, an astronaut, or perhaps the most popular childhood dream jobs in the UK – a doctor or nurse (according to a YouGov survey, 1 in 10 adults in the UK aspired to be a doctor or nurse in their childhoods, followed closely by a footballer and teacher). The sky is the limit…but is this really the case for everyone? Or do gender and societal expectations start limiting aspirations in childhood? The short answer – despite a notable shift in behaviours – is yes.

The London School of Economics and University of Madrid published research into how parental behaviours influence children’s perception of gender as they go through preference formation. The study found that children’s motivation and self-esteem, and thereby their job preferences and ambitions, are greatly influenced by parental “sex-typical behaviours” and their socioeconomic resources. Those children who deem only certain jobs appropriate because of their gender are more likely to go into sex-typical careers, however girls with high levels of motivation and both boys and girls with high self-esteem were both more likely to go against societal norms and choose sex-atypical jobs. It doesn’t stop there; girls who aspired and therefore joined stereotypically female jobs were more likely to earn less because of the lower wages which persist across female-dominated roles.

These findings have implications on our approach to addressing gender parity and those who continue to push for parity in the workplace have much to consider. Is there merit in shifting more focus and investment to the “preference formation” stage when prospective employees are in the process of developing their preferences and aspirations, rather than later when aspirations are almost fully formed?

Some businesses are already actively engaging with the younger generation through initiatives with schools – addressing gender equality as well as social mobility. Organisations such as Inspiring the Future and Teach First are connecting professionals with schools and teachers to facilitate this dialogue around aspirations, and providing a platform for children to engage with role models – a critical factor in shaping aspirations. MIT economist Esther Duflo whose research found that role models had a direct impact on ambitions, described the role model effect in an interview: “Seeing women in charge persuaded parents and teens that women can run things, and increased their ambitions. Changing perceptions and giving hope can have an impact on reality.”

Introducing role models into the lives of young children doesn’t just come through family and professionals connected formally. We don’t always have direct access to role models who can inspire and encourage us along the journey, however entrepreneurs Francesca Cavallo and Elena Favilli believe that storytelling can be an effective tool. Rather than being surrounded by the traditional tales of trapped princesses and saving knights, parents and teachers should be sharing real stories such as those in their book “Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls”, detailing the lives of past and present female role models – including Malala Yousafai and Serena Williams. Both girls and boys are able to see beyond the traditional sex-typical roles, and can reflect the stories and lessons from the successful women in their thinking as they develop their career aspirations and later into the workplace.

The power of storytelling in influencing and inspiring others has been widely discussed, but where possible, we must continue to provide platforms to give girls and women direct access to role models. A paper published by the Chartered Management Institute (CMI) in 2014 pointed to the need for a “role model revolution”. Women continue to look for role models who inspires other, stands up for their beliefs, build confidence in others, make a difference to society, and demonstrate that they are able to overcome challenges. Acknowledging that no one person can provide all of this, 86% of the survey respondents were looking to develop relationships with more than one individual.

Yet only 55% of those surveyed by CMI said there are enough role models across their organisations and industries – even though 81% saw the benefits of role models in raising aspirations. CMI also asked survey participants to name their most inspirational role models; of the top 10 listed, only 2 were women and have now passed away (Margaret Thatcher and Mother Teresa).

We all know female role models exist and many of them continue to engage successfully with both women and men in the workplace and before. However we all have more to do:

  • Talk about your successful female colleagues and friends so others know they exist and the great work they do
  • Share these success stories with children and young adults by engaging with schools and local communities – waiting until they are 16 isn’t benefiting anyone
  • Lead by example and put yourself forward as a role model – you too can inspire

This isn’t an action list just for women; men also have a role to play – both in the workplace and at home. Assistant Professor Alyssa Croft’s research found that those fathers who not only talked about gender equality but also demonstrated it in sharing household responsibilities were more likely to have daughters who aspired to more sex-neutral or male-dominated jobs.

If we truly want to remove the need for the multiple gender-focused diversity networks and reports, and see the end of headlines such as “without action gender pay gap won’t close until 2069”, we must each take responsibility for positively influencing how the next generation develop their aspirations so that the sky really is the limit.

In the words of Albert Einstein, “setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.” It’s not just about talking the talk, but also walking the walk.

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Want to Win in the Fight For Female Talent? Urgent Change Needed!

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Contributed by Aoife Flood. Based in Dublin, Ireland, Aoife is Senior Manager of the Global Diversity and Inclusion Programme at PricewaterhouseCoopers International Limitedaoife flood featured

Around the world, the workplace gender gap is an area in need of immediate and serious attention and at PwC we believe that we must, and can, drive change more quickly.

The good news is we’re seeing a tidal wave of organisations across the world inject greater urgency into their efforts to tackle gender imbalances, in fact 87% of CEOs globally told us they are actively focused on talent diversity and inclusion. The bad news is we are still decades away from achieving gender parity in the corporate world, and in most countries in the world women still remain underrepresented at every level in the corporate pipeline.

One lever that organisations across the world can leverage to incite more rapid change is their attraction and selection efforts. To create energy and debate in this area I had the privilege of leading a ground-breaking global research study focused on gender inclusive recruitment. And I’m very excited to share that we released the results of this research in PwC’s Winning the fight for female talent report in honour of International Women’s Day.

Female hires in hot demand

The report makes one thing clear, explicit hiring targets have emerged as a core driver of change, in fact 78% of large organisations told us they are actively seeking to hire more women – especially into more experienced and senior level positions. As organisations fight to attract female talent – particularly at levels and in sectors where they’re currently underrepresented – we’re now seeing competition for female talent escalate to a whole new level.

Yet, 30% of women globally said they feel employers are too biased in favour of men when it comes to attracting talent, compared with 13% of men. This is a number that has been on the rise when we consider specifically women from the millennial generation; 16% of female millennials felt this way in 2011, 25% in 2015 and 28% feel this way today.

There is also a clear mismatch between the views of women and employers regarding the barriers limiting greater levels of female recruitment. Of the top five barriers employers identify, four explicitly point to external factors, such as the lack of a sufficient candidate pool (37%) and our industry sector not being viewed as attractive by women (24%). While of the top five barriers identified by women, four explicitly point to internal systemic challenges within employer attraction and selection activities and processes. For example, the impact of gender stereotypes in the recruitment process (45%) and concerns over cost and impact of maternity leave (42%).

Focus on gender inclusive recruitment is critical

Simply focusing on hiring more women, will not be sufficient. Yes, organisations will need to get really good at knowing where to find and how to attract female talent, but that’s not all. They also need to look inside, and transform the objectivity of their own recruitment and selection process and activities if they are to succeed in fostering fair and equal recruitment. And female talent today have their finger firmly on the diversity pulse, 56% of women – rising to 63% for women who are starting out on their careers – said they look to see if an organisation has made progress on diversity when deciding whether or not to work for them. Furthermore, when deciding to accept their most recent position, 61% of women looked at the diversity of the employers leadership team and 67% explored if the employer had positive role models they felt where similar to themselves.

Opportunities for career progression – yes please

Opportunities for career progression, competitive pay, and a culture of flexibility and work-life balance come out as the three most attractive employer traits for men and women overall. Women starting their careers, and female millennials (born 1980-1995) rank opportunities for career progression as their most attractive employer trait. While women with career experience who have recently changed jobs say a lack of opportunities for career progression is the top reason they left their former employer.

Traditional stereotypes associated with gender or life stage, for example, the over association of career ambition with men, and flexibility and work-life balance demands with women, specifically mothers, are well and truly out of date. To be a magnet to the modern talent pool, organisations must equip themselves to offer opportunities for career progression, a culture of flexibility, and competitive pay as workforce-wide realities for all their talent. And to attract the best and brightest male and female talent, they must also make these an integral part of their talent brands and talent systems.

In today’s highly competitive job market, it is incumbent on every organisation to revisit its policies and processes to make sure they are meeting the needs of the modern workforce, in particular the woman of today who is truly a trailblazer. Women today are looking for much more from their careers than previous generations – and organisations need to keep up if they are to secure the talent they need to grow their business.

We invite you to find out more by visiting www.pwc.com/femaletalent.

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Career Fantasy – A Future Job or a Serious Distraction to Your Success Right Now?

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woman thinking - pipelineBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Pyschologist

Most people have a career fantasy. What do I mean? Well, think about it right now; do you want to start a business that involves a cozy bed and breakfast in your favorite holiday spot? Or a cupcake business or a dog groomers? You get the picture and feel free to insert your own fantasy here as most of us have them.

You are not on your own as many folks day dream their way through their current job with a future fantasy of how the future might be.

It is real? Is it a fantasy? Does it matter? I think it matters for two reasons.

Firstly, if it is real, then what is stopping you from doing it on the sooner side? When pushed, my clients often realize that they have gotten no further than the headline and a surefire way to test your own assumptions is to start researching the feasibility and competition of the future industry you are considering entering. if you get this far, then maybe it is not a fantasy, maybe you are on the way to being an entrepreneur? Next step then is to perhaps apply SMART goals? Deep dive into real possibilities as it might be the ride of your life.

However, if you really do not want to own a B&B to the north, south, east or west of where you are now, you might find that out by truly not wanting to do any research or upon investigation find it not to be a viable job. If that is the case, then what role does it serve in terms of your mental involvement at work- is it keeping you engaged at work or distracted and disengaged?

Arguably, having a little dream can be a lovely way to keep you working so that you can save up for it, at least in your mind’s eye and this is a motivator (retirement is a different thing to being a business owner unless you can afford a working hobby).

But, what you do not want to do is to mistake this future perfect state as a “grass is greener” option instead of actually understanding why you do not like your job today. Examine with a coach what is really going on to see how to work out how to stay successfully or leave successfully but not to live in a dream your life away state so that you cannot engage in the present. Talk to a professional coach about real options for your future career and take a vacation to recharge if you feel like a rut is forming so that you can enjoy the present.

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach then email nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com for a no obligation chat

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Voice of Experience: Maude Lebois, Partner, International Arbitration Group, Paris, Shearman & Sterling

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By Cathie Ericson

Shearman & Sterling Partner Maude Lebois finds that younger associates have a tendency to postpone developing their private lives in favor of their professional lives — but she believes it’s absolutely possible to live both lives simultaneously at full speed. shearman

“If you focus on quality rather than quantity, you do not have to compromise,” she says. “By nature attorneys are typically perfectionists, but we need to be as ambitious in our private lives as our professional lives from the start.”

She believes part of this is timing: She has seen women having their first child right before or right after becoming partner, which can be the hardest years for both endeavors.

“It’s a misconception that leaders don’t want you to have a fulfilling private life; in fact, certainly in our group, it’s a key focus,” she says, noting that the two managing partners have aggressively promoted several women partners on the team, making it clear from the beginning that they supported a balanced life. In fact, she cites being named counsel while coming back from maternity leave as one of her proudest moments. “It sent a strong signal to younger associates.”

Finding the Female Advantage

Lebois completed her legal education in Belgium and Harvard Law School, and began her professional career with three years at Linklaters in Brussels, a Magic Circle firm. She joined Shearman in 2005 as part of the international arbitration team and was promoted to counsel in 2013 and then partner in 2016.

She is proud to be part of this ambitious and successful team, which routinely is involved in high-profile, complex cases. Currently working on a large construction case in Africa, Lebois notes that she sits in on daily meetings with engineers where it is not unusual to be the only woman in the group due to the powerful trifecta of Africa, the oil and gas industry and the field of engineering.

She has turned that into an advantage; when there are women in the room, she finds that men tend to be more cautious than they otherwise would. “They may be quite direct, but become more polite when there is a woman in their world.”

She enjoys these large-scale projects where counsel needs to not only understand how the law will be applied to the situation but also gain a full understanding of any technical issues, which requires practitioners to be curious about all types of technical skills.

 

“As you look at a large construction project, you have to fully understand the initial scope of work in order to determine how it evolved and whether additional work was required, so it can be a puzzle.”

 

This reality can be a surprise to younger associates who, in addition to the practice of law, find themselves engaged substantially on conducting delay analysis, technical research and other exciting  assignments.

A Strong Team Makes the Difference 

Echoing her advice to pursue a robust private and professional life, Lebois notes that it is imperative to have a strong team supporting you, both in the firm and your private life.

 

“You won’t succeed if you come home after a long day and have to apologize to your husband and kids,” she says. “You are setting a good example by working hard, and everyone should appreciate your efforts on both fronts.”

Lebois appreciated that this year Shearman invited spouses to the partner meeting which allowed them to better understand the work setting as they met colleagues and experienced the environment. In her case, she says it made her husband even more supportive and proud of her success.

That support extends to the bonds she has built at the firm, with a strong women partner team that meets regularly. She is also part of Shearman’s WISER (Women’s Initiative for Success, Excellence and Retention) group and has found that having mentors who supported and protected her and women in general is integral to success.

In her off-hours she enjoys backpacking with her family, including her five-year-old daughter.

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Mover and Shaker: Susan Nicholson, Director of Product and Marketing, WEX Australia

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 By Cathie Ericson
Susan Nicholson says she always assumed that her degree coupled with hard work would equal success. “Those elements are your ticket to play, but hard work is not enough,” she found.Susan
In addition, she says, “You have to demonstrate mastery, but also align yourself to deliver on key outcomes and be a well-rounded leader. If you don’t work well with others, your ability to move up in the organization is hampered.”
She herself has found that a key to success is always delivering on what she has promised, which creates trust and respect in your network.
 
Growing Her Career and Her Team
 
After earning her graduate degree, she got her start in the buying office for Myer department stores (at the time part of the Coles Myer/WESFARMERS retail group). Over a 13 year career at WESFARMERS, Nicholson worked across their business units from department stores to supermarkets and then focusing much of her time on getting the organization to unlock the insights from their rich data through POS, scheme, shareholder and loyalty programs. She participated in the launch of a Coles Supermarket scheme card they worked on with GE, and after that worked with GE for five years, before joining WEX four years ago where she is currently in the role of Director of Product & Marketing for the Asia Pacific region.
Seeking to emulate the qualities of leaders she has admired over the years, Nicholson says the professional achievement she is most proud of so far is her growth as a leader. She particularly appreciates any chance to instill confidence in women who haven’t yet developed it. “I love to empower them to understand their potential to have a great career,” she says. “When you see your team grow and their accomplishments be recognized it is a commendation of your own role.”
 
“I’ve been able to build a diverse, highly accountable team. While the skills of the team are very different, the values are shared. That’s one of the reasons we all enjoy continuing to push, challenge and improve on what we are doing”
 
“The work we have been doing over the past couple of years in the innovation and digital space has created a great energy across the team and the broader business, and WEX Australia has earned recognition by being named one of the top 50 most innovative companies in Australia for 2016.”
 
In terms of career advice, Nicholson would also encourage others to continue to keep their skill set current. “What are you doing to develop yourself? How are you externally focused? Do you understand your customer needs and pain points? What could be the disrupters to the way you do business?” she challenges.
 

Right now she is looking forward to an imminent fuel card program launch which will bring one of the missing ingredients they’ve been looking for in their existing product sets. “I am excited for the potential for that launch and a big focus on expanding in Asia, which will be a positive challenge for our team.”

 

Career Lessons Learned

While she notes that mistakes will always happen, the most crucial component is how you deal with them; for example by exuding a calmness and having the ability to logically work out next steps to arrive at a solution. Your take away should be what you have learned from the experience and building on that.
 
“Seeing how someone mitigates failure is one of the most telling aspects of their character”
 
In addition she recommends always being ready to jump in to any project and give it your best. “If someone gives you an opportunity, put your hand up so that you can be involved in the newest and most interesting things, which is where you are bound to learn the most,” she advises.
 
“In today’s environment you need to create a culture and be a willing participant in a culture that isn’t afraid of failure, brave enough to try something new and figuring out new paths for organizational growth. Working with companies such as WEX with the freedom to explore, build and grow is really important to me in terms of career satisfaction,” she says.
 
That attitude has led Nicholson to be active in many groups, both internal and external. She was involved in the GE Women’s Network and now at WEX has been active in the Women in Payments Australian Symposiums. WEX is one of the first sponsors of that group in Australia, which fosters a network for women in the payments industry.
 
WEX is currently planning its third sponsorship of the event, which has been a positive way to raise the company’s profile, as well as leverage the network and introduce others to the fact that there is an exciting career path in payments.
 
WEX has a robust leadership program that has given her a lesson she is happy to bring home. “I want to make sure I am giving my two young children the time they need to watch them grow,” she says, a life balance encouraged by WEX.
 
This holistic view has also inspired her to find time to squeeze in fitness and other pursuits. “I am happier and more productive when I achieve a healthy balance in all parts of my life.”  
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Idolize Your Boss? Not So Fast.

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team-meeting-in-office-5lNobody likes to work for somebody who doesn’t respect their employees, make fair decisions, or is more concerned with their own professional advancement than the good the whole team. It’s easy to spot a bad boss, but what does a good boss look like? You might picture her being open to your ideas, easy to talk to, supportive of your professional development and excited about your work. These are nice ideas, but sometimes what seems like a good boss at first can quickly sour when you find out that great performance review was rooted in their own desire to be liked. And sometimes, that tough to please boss who never lets you get a word in has the potential to teach you lesson that will grow your career by leaps and bounds.

How can you learn to manage a relationship with your boss, whether they are good or bad? And, when things do go bad, how can you steer the relationship back to healthy?

When Love Hurts

Annie McKee is a senior fellow at the University of Pennsylvania, director of the PennCLO Executive Doctoral Program and the author of Resonant Leadership. In her work with leaders, she often sees the downside of having a boss who grows their leadership style from the root of having a congenial relationship with their employees. Mckee lists three primary issues that can arise from idolizing or loving your boss.

First, strong emotions tend to cloud our judgment, making it more likely that we will be passive when we should be assertive. Probably, having good judgment is one of the reasons you were hired in the first place—you don’t want to leave it at the door when you go into work each day.

Second, a relationship that is based in ‘liking’ one another can often lead to favoritism. This is never a good scenario; as soon as there is a problem, your boss is likely to distance themselves from you, as their likeability is their top concern. You will soon be replaced by the next easy target.

Finally, blind dedication to a leader can actually be truly dangerous as it leaves you vulnerable to making decisions which can compromise your values.

The bright side of a bad boss

While recent research shows that a boss who is truly abusive—somebody who uses public humiliation and personal attacks to impose fear and blind cooperation—is absolutely bad for your health and will most likely have a negative impact on your family life, it is possible to manage the relationship in a way that will benefit you, your team and the your company.

There is a lot of research supporting the negative impacts—on every aspect of business from the employee’s personal health to the company’s bottom line—of bad bosses, but there is not so much research on the positive impacts. Even so, there are many people whom have found that they have learned as much from challenging bosses as they have from those whom were easier to work with. If you are able to take a step back, you will learn what not to do, become more resilient, and self-reliant. These are stellar qualities that can help you become ready for your next leadership position.

A difficult relationship with your boss could be rooted in a number of different conflict types. They could be plainly harsh in their criticisms, irrational in their decision-making process or you could simply have a personality conflict. Either way, how can you find your way through it to the next phase of your career without damaging your personal brand, or your job performance?

Moving onward and upward

According to the American Psychological Association, the best way to manage a difficult boss begins with understanding the reasons your boss’ chooses to behave the way she does. If it seems that the behavior stems from stress due to work overload, it is likely to change in response to changes in the amount of workload or other factors. But if your boss’ behavior seems to follow a consistently hostile or abusive patter of interacting with co-workers and employees, it is less likely that the behavior will change. In this case, the APA recommends seeking the counsel of a trusted mentor.

Once you have determined the reason for your boss’s behavior, you will want to manage your own negative emotions. You do not want to engage in self-defeating behaviors such as counter-attacking your boss or stonewalling them. Remember your purpose at work, do your job, and remain professional.

Third, communicate your feelings with your boss or another trusted supervisor. It is important to frame your concerns in a positive manner. Perhaps this will bring a change, but some experts say this is unlikely. The administration of the company has already expressed their opinion by promoting the difficult boss in question.

In the meantime, the APA advises to try and separate your personal ego from your business persona. When your supervisor is critical, be rational in your response. Is there something for you to learn from the criticism? If so, use it as an opportunity to work with your boss on a play to address the problem. But if you don’t think it is reasonable or valid criticism, then take solace in that. Their lack of judgment does not have to take over your entire sense of self.

By Rebecca S. Caum

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