Tag Archive for: LGBTQ ally

Beyond Pride Month: LGBTQ+ Inclusion Is About Every Single Day

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LGBTQ+ InclusionLGBTQ+ is a form of invisible diversity that is both growing and significantly changing, especially among younger generations. Yet, many LGBTQ+ employees continue to report a lack of real inclusion and safety in the workplace.

During Pride Month, let’s remember why valuing LGBTQ+ employees is not just about a month of celebration, adapted logos and rainbow flags – but about a deep commitment to building LGBTQ+ inclusive and safe workplaces that allow all individuals to contribute and thrive every single day.

Underrepresentation for LGBTQ+ From Entry to Leadership

According to Gallup in 2021, 7.1% of the U.S. identifies as LGBTQ+ (doubling since 2012) and 21% of Gen Z do (twice the proportion of millennials). LGBTQ+ identification is increasing across major racial and ethnic groups – giving rise to more diverse, intersectional identities.

Yet under-representation in the workplace for LGBTQ+ groups begins at entry level. McKinsey found that LGBTQ+ women are underrepresented by more than half, even at entry level. Meanwhile at the top, only .5% of the board seats in the Fortune 500 are held by openly LGBTQ+ directors and only a few Fortune 500 CEOs are openly gay, including one woman. One transgender woman leads a Fortune 1000 company. The lack of visible LGBTQ+ executive leadership limits visible role models for younger talent.

LGBTQ+ men (80%) are more likely to be out than LGBTQ+ women (58%). Senior LGBTQ+ leaders (80%) are more out than junior employees (32%), even though their peers are more accepting and demand inclusivity in the workplace.

Globally, the World Economic Forum is advocating for LGBTQ+ visibilty: more LGBTQ+ representation in business and media that tells more diverse and inclusive stories of LGBTQ+ individuals, to advance both equality and acceptance. LGBTQ+ community members report feeling least authentically represented in media depictions. And while 63% of non-LGBTQ+ people perceive the “community” as one collective group with similar needs, the reality of a changing LGBTQ+ culture has never been further away.

While LGBTQ+ acceptance has grown globally since 1981, an unprecedented number of anti-LGBTQ+ bills are proposed in U.S. state legislatures, 71 countries still criminalize consensual same-sex sexual activity, 15 countries criminalize the gender identity and/or expression of transgender people and 11 countries deem consensual same-sex relations punishable by death.

LGBTQ+ Experiences In the Workplace

A LinkedIn survey of LBGTQ professionals found 24% were not open about their identity at work and 26% feared they’d be treated differently by coworkers, echoing McKinsey’s findings that one in four LGBTQ+ employees are not out at work.

McKinsey research found that half of out LGBTQ+ individuals have to come out at least once a week: especially challenging for women, junior employees, and people outside Europe and North America. BCG found 40% of U.S. LGBTQ employees are closeted at work and that 75% have experienced negative day-to-day workplace interactions related to their identity.

Yet being out has helped many to access more of their potential. According to LinkedIn, LGBTQ+ individuals report being open at work helps them connect with others for support and build better relationships. According to McKinsey, individuals experience greater well-being and are more able to focus on work. Those who are out are far less likely to plan to leave their current employer. But in absence of strong cultures of inclusion, many are deterred or facing headwinds.

According to CIPD research on LGBTQ+ inclusion, LGB+ employees (40%) and trans employees (55%) experience more workplace conflict and harassment than heterosexual employees (29%) and feel less psychological safety. LinkedIn found 31% reported facing discrimination or microaggressions at work.

Williams Institute at UCLA School of Law also found that nearly half (46%) of LGBT workers have experienced unfair treatment at work, such as harassment, dismissal or hiring discrimination based on their LGBT status. Nearly one-fourth have experienced discrimination when applying for jobs, and even more so for transgender workers.

67% of LGBT workers have heard slurs, jokes and negative comments about LGBT people. Half are not out to their supervisors. While 40% of LGBT cis-gender employees are likely to adopt behaviors to “cover,” nearly 60% of transgender employees are. Trans individuals are twice as likely to hear sexist jokes about people of their gender, three times more likely to feel they can’t talk about life outside of work, and think more often about leaving.

When it comes to advancing, McKinsey reports that many LGBTQ+ employees believe they have to outperform non-LGBTQ+ colleagues to gain recognition and 40% of LGBTQ+ women feel they need to provide extra evidence of their competence. Compared to 2/3 of non-LGBTQ+ employees, only half of LGBTQ+ respondents saw people like themselves in management positions at their organizations. Less than 1 in 4 of have an LGBTQ+ sponsor, even though senior LGBTQ+ leaders are twice as likely as straight and cis-gender peers to credit sponsors for their own career growth.

LGBTQ+ employees earn 90% on every $1 and transgender employees make 32% less per year than their cisgender peers. 1 in 3 LGBTQ+ U.S. employees feel discrimination has impacted their promotion or salary levels.

And a study published in the Journal of Business and Psychology found that leaders with same-sex sexual orientation are perceived to be less effective and receive less follower conformity than heterosexual leaders, regardless of gender presentation or biological gender, especially among male followers (women followers were more supportive). The researchers note that extra care must be taken to ensure same-sex sexual orientation leaders are evaluated fairly in performance reviews.

The Remote Workplace Has Mixed Impacts on LGBTQ+ Inclusion

In a global study, McKinsey found that LGBTQ+ employees in the remote workplace were 1.4 times more likely (twice as likely in Asia) than straight and cis-gender peers to report acute challenges with workload increase and fair performance reviews. They struggled more from a loss of workplace connectivity and belonging. Two of three LGBTQ+ employees reported acute or moderate challenges with mental health. Additionally, a survey of remote workers in tech reported that online harassment and hostility went up for LGBTQ workers during the pandemic.

McKinsey researchers noted: “The allyship found in social and work settings is an important source of belonging among many in the LBGTQ+ community.”

On the other hand, some LGBTQ+ employees found remote work to be a ‘game changer for inclusion.’ With remote work, employees can remain in a place where they have a supportive community and work for an employer in a different location. Some find the remote office reduces the pressure of office interactions and helps avoid appearance-based comments. It also makes it straight-forward to introduce pronouns.

The Cost for Lacking LGBTQ+ Inclusion

It’s been estimated that the US economy could save $9 billion annually if organizations had more effective inclusion policies for LGBTQ+ employees.

A recent argument in Forbes demonstrated that a lack of LGBTQ+ inclusion is costing companies. If an LGBTQ+ employee – either out or closeted – spends even 15 minutes of their day either explaining or evading uncomfortable situations related to their identity, it amounts to 65 hours a year, or over $1500 per LGBTQ+ employee based on median income, to compensate for a workplace that isn’t LGBTQ+ inclusive: which sums to a quarter million for a company with 10,000 employees or $2 billion for U.S. employers, annually.

“Add it all up, and employers are wasting a huge amount of money by not creating spaces where LGBTQ+ folks can bring their whole selves to work, do their jobs and be successful,” writes Michael Bach.

Meanwhile, many studies confirm that when employees are within a genuinely inclusive organizational culture, it benefits individuals, teams, organizations and the bottom line.

LGBTQ+ Inclusion Is a Cultural Commitment

While Pride Month is a celebration that lasts for a month, a LGBTQ+ employee needs to feel included – and protected from homophobia and transphobia – every day, and regardless if they choose to share their identity in the workplace. Because LGBTQ+ individuals are less visible than other underrepresented groups, organizations must go the extra mile.

Inclusion is not performative but about mitigating biases, creating authentic belonging, valuing LGBTQ+ voices and providing equal opportunity to contribute and fulfill potential. When it comes to LGBTQ+ inclusion, dedicated corporations advocate for legislative change and oppose legislative discrimination.

At a DEI commitment level, LGBTQ+ inclusion must be a specific priority and companies must seek to understand how individuals who are LGBTQ+ experience the office differently to other groups. It means visible leadership commitment to inclusion and leadership representation, and activating sponsorship of LGBTQ+ talent.

At an advocacy level, it means leveraging the corporate voice to oppose discriminatory legislation that targets the LGBTQ+ community and even leading the charge as powerful allies on LGBTQ+ rights.

At a policy and processes level, inclusion means making sure policies are LGBTQ+ inclusive such as domestic-partner benefit and trans-inclusive healthcare coverage as well as clear about non-discrimination on gender, gender identity, and sexual orientation regardless of whether employees are “out”; mitigating assumptions and bias in hiring, reviews, pay and promotions; adapting technological interfaces to be inclusive (such as freedom to input chosen names in data fields); providing gender-neutral restrooms; and protecting employees from bullying whether in-office or online.

At the level of everyday cultural interactions, it means cultivating compassion and awareness among employees; using inclusive and gender-neutral language in the workplace; actively encouraging allyship, empowering better allyship and making allyship visible; investing in LGBTQ+ networks and rewarding contributions; setting aside safe spaces for voices to come forth; normalizing the adding of pronouns on LinkedIn and social media profiles; recognizing that identifies are fluent and complex and letting people tell you how they identify on their terms; celebrating LGBTQ+ calendar events and days; and most of all creating a culture of learning, openness and psychological safety.

It’s the organizations and leaders that champion not a month, but a sustained and iterative commitment to LGBTQ+ inclusion, that will make a real difference to LGBTQ+ lives.

By Aimee Hansen

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5 Ways To Become a Better LGBTQ+ Ally

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LGBTQ+ allyBeing an LGBTQ+ ally is being an advocate for, and active participant in, building cultural inclusion.

According to Fast Company, “Allyship refers to everyday acts which challenge behavioral norms and support members of marginalized groups through an awareness of the issues being faced by others.”

A team of professors in Harvard Business Review view “allyship” as: “a strategic mechanism used by individuals to become collaborators, accomplices, and coconspirators who fight injustice and promote equity in the workplace through supportive personal relationships and public acts of sponsorship and advocacy. Allies endeavor to drive systemic improvements to workplace policies, practices, and culture.”

Here are five ways to be an accomplice in creating cultural inclusion:

1. Cultivate Awareness and Empathy.

A lot of advice for being a better ally focuses on self-education. But what is the objective of that? Cultivating awareness and empathy.

A prerequisite of support is cultivating awareness of realities and painful disadvantages that you do not have direct experience of: becoming aware of the bias and discrimination and understanding why it causes harm. The absence of having to experience that reality is what we call ‘privilege’.

Allyship requires a willingness to open your eyes and place yourself in another’s shoes as they tell you how that experience exists for them through their eyes.

In their March 2020 survey of 2,000 LGBTQ+ employees and 2,000 straight employees, in partnership with NYC LGBT Community Center, Boston Consulting Group (BCG) found an interesting insight.

Natural allyship is on the rise, because the separation between young LGBTQ people and their straight peers is more narrow. Compared to their older counterparts, straight employees under 35 are 1.6 times more likely to know LGBTQ colleagues, 3.6 times more likely to join ally programs and 3 times more likely to find value in colleagues being ‘out’.

The younger the employee group, the greater the awareness of discrimination. For example, only one-fourth of straight 55-64 year olds witnessed any discrimination in the past year, compared to 57% of their LGBTQ+ peers. But 85% of straight 18-24 year olds witnessed it, much closer to the 91% of LGBTQ+ who also did.

That change reflects a much smaller gap and increased sensitivity in the ability to see certain behaviors as harmful to certain groups, even if you do not belong to the group.

By expanding your exposure to the stories of others, whether through personal connection, documentaries, books or following LGBTQ+ leaders and media, you increase your awareness of the nuances of discrimination and build empathy. Start here: Are you aware of the common microaggressions that LGBTQ+ people experience?

2. Recognize Identity As Personally Defined and Fluid.

As theglasshammer covered recently, social identity is increasingly becoming more personal, intersectional, fluid and multiple. But more than anything, identity is increasingly self-identified. The myriad range of LGBTQ+ experiences are far from universal.

It’s important to realize that language matters, and not make assumptions about the identity or orientation of another person or about what that belonging means for them.

By allowing others to tell you about themselves through their voice, rather than make assumptions, you remain curious and allow others to find their authenticity. An inside-out connection that begins with the internal connection with self, and interacting with others and the world from the space of that inner truthfulness, is the basis of authenticity.

Being conscious of your own language helps to avoid making assumptions, such as using gender-neutral terms like ‘partner’. Honoring a person’s self-identity includes observing the personal pronouns that people choose for themselves and normalizing that choice.

Certain short-cut assumptions are well-conditioned in our brains, so it takes effort to not make those automatic leaps. But when it comes to another person’s life, it’s far more connective to show up by listening to them before you assert assumptions about who they are.

3. Embrace The Growth in Discomfort.

“Allyship is not knowing it all and never making mistakes. That’s impossible,” writes Freddy McConnell, host of Pride & Joy BBC podcast. “It’s putting in the effort and not expecting trophies.”

Allyship requires vulnerability, because you’re going to be clumsy at times. As McConnell writes: “When my friend came out to me as nonbinary, I practised their pronouns in private. Being trans does not imbue me with a special gift for unlearning familiar speech patterns.”

It’s not about getting it right or wrong, but about being open to learning. Before we challenge any unconscious bias, stereotypes or assumptions in the culture around us, we often foremost come to confront the existence of them within ourselves, even as part of the LGBTQ+ community.

Often the roots of rejection (of others and self-rejection) are shame-based beliefs and conditioning. Evolving involves unlearning that cultural conditioning, including the habit to shame ourselves if we get it wrong.

A willingness to be wrong, admit when you’re wrong, own your mistake and be receptive to guidance is what is valuable to a growth mindset and to keeping the focus on your intention of better allyship.

“Allyship is actually more about the mistakes than the things that you do right,” says human rights advocate Maybe Burke, who conducts allyship training on behalf of the Transgender Training Institute. “It’s about how you deal with those mistakes and move forward.”

4. Treat Ally as a Verb.

As suggested in a University College London (UCL) blog: “Think of ‘ally’ as an action rather than a label.” Being an ally is not about whether you consider yourself as an ally, but how you show up in support consistently.

In their research, BCG found that only 34% of straight employees always intervene when they see an encounter. As written in HBR: “When you witness discrimination, don’t approach the victim later to offer sympathy. Give him or her your support in the moment.”

Remaining silent is a comfortable form of passive collusion—it assures that heteronormative assumptions and microaggressions remain invisible, insidious and unchallenged within the fabric of an organizational culture, and puts the emotional burden on LGBTQ+ people to be the only ones calling out these behaviors. It also makes it more vulnerable for them to do so.

Are you willing to speak up when you hear something that feels wrong or discriminatory or does not sit well, inside of your heart? And will you be that voice in the room, even when the LGBTQ+ person may not be in it? Are you being an ally (verbing it) in the moment it’s called for?

5. Uplift LGBTQ+ Voices.

Ultimately, allyship embraces an interdependent lens: a culture is not really working for anybody if it’s not welcoming and nutritive for everybody. An organizational culture needs to be a win-win for all employees on all levels to be maximally effective.

That’s why performative allyship is dangerous—it comes from a place of ego protection, does not integrate win-win and keeps the focus on the appearance of allyship (the guise of doing good) rather than fundamentally being aligned to real organizational change for everyone’s good.

Performative allyship fears losing its position or does not really embrace the point.

Speaking up as an ally is not about speaking over, but raising everyone’s voice. Be willing to ask how you can support your LGBTQ+ colleagues in the way that is most meaningful for them.

While your voice will be needed as an ally, your success will be evidenced in the greater space for marginalized LGBTQ+ voices at the center, not the edges, of the organizational conversation—down to the small and casual daily interactions that form relationships and culture.

(If you are a leader who wants to develop your skills as an inclusive leader to leverage diversity and truly understand the topic as a strategic capability, work with Nicki Gilmour on this topic as she coaches male and female leaders and managers who are growing their skills and evolving their behaviors to lead the current and future top talent of their firms. For an exploratory call, please book a session here.)

By Aimee Hansen

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OP-ED: Be an LGBTQ Ally to Help Your Daughter or Son Come Out

By Katherine Dean, head of Family Dynamics, Wells Fargo Private Bank

Have you ever worried about a child?

Wondering what’s on their mind and whether they are doing OK? And how things are going with school and socially for them? Any parent, as well as grandparents, aunts, and uncles, would most likely answer “yes,” especially as a child becomes a young adult.

My husband and I certainly don’t have this whole parenting thing figured out. What we have stressed with our 10-year-old son and almost-15-year-old daughter is the importance of two-way communication. And we’ve been intentional in saying repeatedly, “We love you. There’s nothing you can tell us that will ever change that.”

Giving Our Daughter a Safe Outlet for Her Feelings

During our daughter Grace’s eighth-grade year, we started to pick up on small things that made us wonder if she was gay. We knew it wasn’t our place to ask; we needed to wait until she was ready and comfortable to tell us that she was LGBTQ, and to see if that was even the case.

We had just decided to connect her with a therapist so she would have a confidential outlet to share her feelings and thoughts with a neutral third party. This point of connection was about navigating life as a teen, entering high school, and dealing with new social situations. As I remember from my own teen years, it’s a tough transition!

Grace’s Coming-Out Story

I’ll never forget the day. I was at work when I received a text message from my daughter asking if she could talk to us later. We hit a “parenting stroke of luck.” This was a moment of parent PRIDE here as this was a signal we were doing something right!

That evening, we pulled up with her privately in her room and asked what she wanted to talk about. She struggled to say anything and kept trying to get her words out, but they wouldn’t come. We could tell this wasn’t easy for her, but we continued to encourage her to share. She finally asked if she could write it down.

She proceeded to write on a scrap of paper: “I AM GAY.” Instantly, we could see her relief in sharing this news. We immediately got up and hugged her long and hard. We talked about how much we loved her and how thrilled we were that she decided to tell us, and we asked if she needed us to do anything to support her.

Right away, she shared her one request. She asked if our entire family could march in the 2019 San Francisco Pride Parade. Already involved in PFLAG (an organization for family, friends, and allies of LGBTQ people), I made a call to get our family added to the parade roster.

Celebrating Pride as a Family

Our family of four, plus our daughter’s best friend, met up with PFLAG in San Francisco for the big day. Grace wore a Pride flag proudly as a cape, and the rest of us adorned ourselves with Pride gear ranging from flags to beads to hats.

When we arrived, we were greeted by amazing floats, crowds galore, and a very positive vibe. It was inspiring to be surrounded by the strength and beauty of so many.

As the parade started, our daughter, unplanned, decided to carry the PFLAG banner in the front of our group, along with a few other girls around the same age. Our son donned a massive head-to-toe sign across the front of his body that read: “I am a brother.” Moving forward, the emotion overtook me as the crowds cheered and clapped, leaving me teary-eyed and so appreciative of the LGBTQ community’s acceptance of its newest member.

I left that day incredibly full of PRIDE. I was grateful that my daughter trusted us to share her true self and that, as a family, we were able to experience this amazing moment together. I thank all those who came before her for your hard work. The next generation is loud and proud and will continue to carry that work forward, alongside with their families and friends.

Sharing my own experience

Believe it or not, I attribute much of our parenting success to my job. At Wells Fargo, I am grateful to be a part of the Family Dynamics team. We focus on helping families flourish beyond their finances — we help them build communication and trust, prepare future generations, and create shared family purpose.

In my role, I often engage with families having communication challenges. I’m not sure these families realize it, but when I help them, they help me. I strongly believe that we all learn from one another and that everyone has important perspectives to share. I’m proud to be able to give back by sharing my own personal experiences.

To My Daughter and to the LGBTQ Community:

I am a mother. I am a friend. I am your ally. I will always be there for you. You are loved.

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Voice of Experience: Noriko Umeki, Partner, PwC Japan

Noriko Umekiby Cathie Ericson

When reflecting on her career, Noriko Umeki wishes she had known earlier the importance of communication, as well as using personal marketing to further her endeavors.

“One day I realized that I wouldn’t be evaluated highly just because I was working on the job in front of me. People who get chances for better positions display a high level of interpersonal abilities so it’s important to expand your network both inside and outside the company by letting people know about you,” she says.

“Each one of us has to seize our opportunities, and in Japan, women are less aware about this concept unfortunately.” However, she adds, over the past years, there have been small but significant strides with the ratio of female managers gradually improving from 2% when she started her career to 12% in Japan.

Increasing Her Profile at PwC and in the Accountant Community

Umeki started her career at PwC as a Japanese Certified Public Accountant (JCPA) and has engaged in accounting services for the past 25 years, becoming a partner in 2009. Her experience in audit services includes both Japanese and foreign companies in the financial service, manufacturing and pharmaceutical industries.
As an ally, Umeki voluntarily became involved in Diversity & Inclusion activities for PwC Japan Group when she became a partner. In the past decade, she has expanded the firm’s D&I activities, improving D&I awareness and cultivating an inclusive culture at PwC Japan. She considers this an important achievement, given that the World Economic Forum has ranked Japan as 110th in the 2018 Gender Gap Report, highlighting that this issue is an ongoing challenge for Japanese companies.

To that end she has focused on producing female leaders, fostering female juniors and promoting support for LGBT+ members at PwC Japan.

In addition to her work with PwC, Umeki has assumed the post of director at Japan Institute of Certified Public Accountants (JICPA) this coming summer. “I am getting very excited to work on whatever I can do to contribute to development of JICPA,” she says. “The job of experts in accounting should be of social significance, and I would very much like to appeal to society so that young brilliant people will know the attractiveness of J-CPAs and be willing to join us.” And, she says, that will include encouraging young female accountants to join the industry, given that the percentage of female J-CPAs is still very low—at only around 20% in Japan.

An Appealing Career

Umeki believes it’s important for young female professionals to realize that they can successfully continue an accounting career through lots of life events.

“One of the attractions in this profession is that we are able to enhance our value through work and to differentiate ourselves from others since we are required to have a deep knowledge and wide experience,” Umeki says. She recommends that women seek their own leadership style and find the work/life balance that works for them.

Sometimes she sees Japanese women hesitating to take higher positions, yet she notices that many males are becoming increasingly supportive. “We females should change our own awareness and try anything when we are given the opportunity, finding the courage to take the next step,” she says.

Fostering a More Inclusive Culture

The biggest value Umeki has received in becoming an ally for the LGBT+ community is that her perspective has become much wider. “I remember being deeply shocked when I realized that I myself, as a woman, had been discriminating against other minorities unconsciously,” she says. “I was astonished to realize how many people are bound by old stereotypes and customs, but after becoming an ally, I have come to think more about the true nature of the situation. Putting myself in somebody’s shoes is very helpful in my career, as well as in my private life,” Umeki says.

She urges others to deepen their understanding about the LGBT+ community by attending related events or seminars, which will bring D&I issues to light and encourage personal action.

Among some of the advances that have been taken by PwC Japan Group to foster an inclusive culture are establishing an internal network for LGBT+ colleagues and allies. “When companies provide a safe environment, people are able to fulfill their potential to be their best since they will feel safe to be accepted as they are. “ And, Umeki notes, it can help companies attract and retain talented personnel.

She recommends that companies make a point to create that inclusive culture, but also to establish the same benefits for LGBT+ couples as for same-sex marriage, even though Japan does not yet have the necessary legal system.

Trying One New Thing Every Year

Since turning 40, Umeki has made a policy to try one new thing every year; among the new activities she has tried are fishing, yoga, boxing, calligraphy and golf, and she plans to use her accounting acumen to add activities that contribute to issues on women and society.

“I believe that it is never too late to start something when we are supposed to live for 100 years,” she notes.

And although she already cites her most important personal achievement as becoming partner at PwC while raising her two children without suspending her career, she says that from now on, she intends to pursue her career and private life in her own way. “I will enjoy life more,” she says.

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