Tag Archive for: career tips

Frustrated blonde woman sitting at a computerGuest contributed by Ora Nadrich

Looking for work can feel extremely stressful, but we may not realize that the negative thoughts we have around finding a job can actually be the very thing that’s preventing us from getting one.

Too often, it’s our negative thoughts around finding a job that can make us doubt our capabilities or worthiness, and some of those undermining or diminishing thoughts can, in fact, harm our chances of getting hired. Without realizing it, the negative energy around our thoughts can give off a negative vibration that people pick up, and we may not even know that the critical self-talk that’s going on in our head, is the very thing that could sabotage us getting the very thing we need; a job.

That’s why it’s important to be aware of those negative thoughts right when they begin to percolate and wreak havoc with our emotions, and recognize that it’s time to separate from them. The Says Who? method is a straightforward, powerful way of questioning and challenging those thoughts that stops them right in their tracks. And by facing a negative thought with a question, we find out if it’s true — or if we can just let it go. This is an approach anyone can use to overcome negative thoughts so you can be better prepared and confident while seeking employment.

Here’s how to get rid of those negative thoughts in 4 simple steps:

1. Acknowledge the stress. Recognize its existence, even if it’s upsetting. Don’t deny it or try to push it away. Admit you’re feeling stress about looking for a job, and accept that you’re having those negative thoughts. Doing so allows you to focus on what is happening in the “now,” which is actual and real, instead of focusing on the emotions surrounding the thoughts.

2. Shift into observer mode. Shift gears out of reactive mode into observer mode. In reactive mode, you have no distance from your own negative thoughts. But in observer mode, you turn into a witness that is separated and independent from them. Then you’re in a position to ask yourself questions to help get calm and grounded.

3. Ask that negative thought, “Says Who?” You are demanding that thought reveal who is responsible for it. In other words, how did it get in your mind? Once you find out, you can decide what to do about it. Is it your original thought, or was it someone else’s that you took as your own? You may even discover it is an old thought that has become part of your core beliefs, and now it’s time to challenge it and let it go.

Say you’re always thinking, “I’m never going to find the right job.” Asking, “Says Who?” really means: “Why am I saying that I’m never going to find the right job?” Then go one step further. Ask yourself, “Is it me? If so, why would I think a thought that makes me feel insecure or doubt myself?”

4. Now you’re ready to continue the questioning process. The next questions after “Says Who?” further challenge those negative thoughts. Asking, “Have I heard someone say this thought before?” helps you find out if the negative thought is your opinion, or someone else’s. Asking, “Do I like this thought?” gives you license to consider whether it’s a thought worth keeping. And questions such as “Does this thought work for me?” can help you transform that negative thought into something positive and life-affirming. That’s the kind of thought that will help you feel good about yourself so you can venture forth to find a job that is right for you, and that you deserve.

The Says Who? Method is a powerful tool for stopping the stressful, negative thoughts we can have about finding a job. That’s because we tend to judge ourselves, especially when we feel vulnerable. This method stops that anxious “self-doubt on repeat” in its tracks, so you can stop judging yourself so harshly, and be proactive in finding a good job. You can become more effective, successful, and productive. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, it helps you feel empowered — to do and be your best.

About the author

Ora Nadrich is a Certified Life Coach, Certified Mindfulness Meditation teacher, and the author of Says Who? How One Simple Question Can Change The Way You Think Forever. Her popular album, Ora Meditations, is available on iTunes, Spotify, Pandora, Google Play, Amazon mp3 and everywhere music is sold. Learn more at http://www.oranadrich.com

Disclaimer: Views and opinions of Guest Contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

Our resident Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist Nicki Gilmour writes a regular inspiring and useful career tip column for theglasshammer that helps women navigate through their career.Nicki Gilmour

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach you may contact Nicki directly on Nicki@theglasshammer.com for a no obligation chat about our services.

Take a look at the some of the previous articles Nicki has written:

 

Leadership: How to be authentic at work and why sincerity can hinder that

The trouble with “authenticity” in the workplace is that there are many definitions of what being authentic is and in reality we are often defined by the role we play.

Why wanting more at work can be a good and bad thing

I am very guilty of living in the future and this can lead to not being 100% engaged in the present.

 By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Pyschologist

juggle

Image via Shutterstock

Unless you are a fully fledged workaholic ( I used to be one and I know many), you may want to work a little less and do a little more of just about everything else. With the exception of chores which are few people’s idea of fun.

So, how it is possible to live and love in an urban place, give it your all and maybe just maybe have time for other areas of your life, be it having children or not having children. I say that with caution as people get derailed quickly and fall into 2 camps when it isn’t about that division it is about the unification of the truth that we all do work more than ever.

Here are my three tips to get you closer to nirvana.

TIP 1: What tasks at work are non crucial and can be delegated, dumped or reframed to matter more strategically and therefore become worth doing?

TIP 2: How can you break cultural norms in a ‘face time” environment to show that results orientated work and productivity are winners?

TIP 3: At home, what life hacks can you apply to boring admin and chores to outsource or reduce them? Get a system or actual people involved to help you free up your time to live the dream. If you feel your other half needs to do more, tell me what they need to do and when as maybe they just do not know?

Most importantly, it is worth your while to step out of the weeds and look at the big picture – what do you want personally and professionally to happen in the next 24 -36 months?

Best of Luck

Slowing downBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

A bad work day can consist of a scenario when you do not manage the team but are on the hook for delivery of the product. Sound familiar? Literally, this happens everyday to many people and it is a problem that creates issues and looks like a lack of skill and efficiency because team A promised the client something but they had no control over team B actually building the product.

Would you take the responsibility of protecting the free world, if you were not allowed the nuclear codes? Most of you will say no to this yet I see so many people taking on outrageous projects and knowingly being on the hook for things that they literally have zero control over the delivery of. How can you avoid this seemingly inevitable situation?

A good case in point is diversity work.

I see a lot of great women heading up women’s networks and being tasked with creating a bigger pipeline of women in the firm. Unless you have serious formal hiring capabilities as your new day job or the ability and full power to rework all the talent processes in the firm plus all the time in the world and renumeration to do it, then why would you say yes to this? From a transformative outcome frame, you should say no since this has no resource or execution control attached to it.

Unless, the goal is advocacy in which case that is fair enough as advocacy is important but rarely formally transformative. Advocacy is what men do every single day for each other so getting them to do it for you is a strong step in the right direction as is getting women to stop burying each other to protect the patriarchy (which runs deep as we know in recent times).

Also, really good development that understands the nuances of being different to the blueprint is never wasted- train and educate as you go in these networks if formally this is not an option (arguably it should de organized and paid for elsewhere but it is often not the case). A network can be a good container to supply unique content to certain audiences who potentially face shared challenges that are systemic in nature.

Remember, only you know what you want to spend time and energy on and how to create goals that are reachable. It is worth thinking about activity versus productivity and outcomes since you all have lives and goals inside and outside of work. Reduce stress by aligning your responsibility and authority on tasks that become the sum of your job!

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach to help you navigate your career then email Nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com for further informatiom

Is it time to change jobs, change firms or leave the industry? (F)By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Pyschologist

There are many reasons to get a new job. It is worth exploring before you jump ship what it is you do not like at your current job and within that, why you do not like it. This way you have a better chance at not repeating the experience in the next job and in actual fact, you might find you ways to stay in your current position and be much happier and more productive. You know what I am going to say- yes, that’s right! Get a good coach to work through any challenges, fears and feelings that you are having right now and to help you articulate what you do want to do in the hours known as work. The “when” to change jobs is a big one. Often people jump to fast or take a very long time to do it, both extremes can be less than optimal to your career plan. If you are saying “what plan?” right about now then hey no judgement but those who plan tend to get what they want faster by virtue of knowing what they want and this process can help with that as the answer is always inside your own heart and mind.

Anyway, If you are sure you that the time is right to find a new job, you might be wondering how to go about it. I say think of it as a pyramid with the peak being knowing a manager or recruiter in a competing team or firm who needs you and by some serendipity has an open spot. Rarely happens, but if you are not networking and talking with peers and competitors and even clients, then you wont know when it does happen. Networking is the number one way to get a new job. Internally and externally- both are equally valid. Ask your mentor and sponsors (careful if they are your boss) if they know of a challenge that would be good next step for you.

The next layer in the pyramid is using a headhunter. Some are better than others but if you can find a good one, then your legwork is greatly reduced and their job is to conquer the art and science of placing the right person in the open job.

The lowest, broadest and most time consuming way to find a job is applying to hundreds of jobs on the internet. It can feel like a blackhole and although many people do get hired this way, it can not be counted on as the core of your strategy. Here is a review of job boards and the job search that just came across my desk recently that might help you get this foundational piece in place. It is hard to ignore it as an activity but do not rely on it as the only way to secure your next job. Remember, the closer your qualifications are to the requirements posted, the more likely your resume will be fished out of the pile by hand or robots to be considered further.

Best of Luck!

Nicki Gilmour is an industrial psychologist and qualified career coach as well as Founder and CEO of glasshammer2.wpengine.com

If you wish to be coached by Nicki in 2017 she is taking on a small number of (paying) individual clients this year- please apply nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com

2017-featured

By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

You are ready for the next step in your career. The decision you now have to make is whether to stay in your current company or move to another firm. How does one make such a decision rationally? The answer is that most decisions even for the most rational amongst us, are ultimately emotional. So, we can start with listing the reasons to go and reasons to stay. We can then ask ourselves hard questions as objectively as possible about how to advance in the company and team we are in. What do you need to do to make that happen? What skills do you have now and what do you need for the next level? What does the firm need to do? How are the talent processes? Who gets rewarded? What gets rewarded?

Working with a coach can help you sort through your thoughts, feeling and emotions and explore possibilities in a hypothetical way safely.

Sometimes it is time to leave. The trick is to know yourself and what you are good at and what you want to develop skill-wise and realistically put it all together so that you make the right move and get he job you are aiming to get. The job hunt itself can be quite the task and there are effective ways to approach it.

Nicki Gilmour is an industrial psychologist and qualified career coach as well as Founder and CEO of glasshammer2.wpengine.com

If you wish to be coached by Nicki in 2017 she is taking on a small number of (paying) individual clients this year- please apply nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com

Slowing downBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

The holidays are often a blur but can be a time of reflection for some who want change in their jobs and careers as the year turns. Now is a good time to think about what you want out of life for the next 2-5 years.

If you like what you do, then you still should be thinking about a pay rise, a promotion and the bonus discussion that is looming in the next 30-90 days for most people in financial services.

When asking for a raise, there are two schools of thought. One strand of research says that women simply just do not ask for more money. The other branch of research suggest that women do ask but are not heard and more practically buffered with reasons why they do not get the same as men for the same job done. Policies such as percentage incremental increases for example contribute to systemic bias if women are hired at 10-30% less than the guy beside them anyway.

My advice, go big or go home. Explain in detail at every opportunity what you do prior to the annual review so that every step of the way, managers and HR know why you should be rewarded for your work. Then ask. Ask again. Ask for benchmarks. Ask what you need to do to get to the figure or grade you want. Never give up.

If you are in a place where you know that it is time to leave then work with your coach to reason out your thinking a little on what is motivating you to leave. Next week, we will look at why leaving can be a great path forward also. Face your fears and address what is fear and what is real. This way, you start the year empowered to make the right career decisions.

Nicki Gilmour is an industrial psychologist and qualified career coach as well as Founder and CEO of glasshammer2.wpengine.com

If you wish to be coached by Nicki in 2017 she is taking on a small number of (paying) individual clients this year- please apply nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com

Hello 2017

By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

As the year draws to a close this December, it is a good time in all the holiday madness to do some reflection at the end of a busy and often surprising year for many.

What has gone well for you this year? What would you do differently? How would you do it again?

It can be useful to do an “after action review” of some of the interactions and situations that occurred for you in your home and work life to see what you have learned. We cannot change some of the outcomes, but two things are under our control, how we react to what has been handed to us and secondly what behaviorally we will do different in the hope of different outcomes in 2017.

If you did not get the job you wanted this year, even if you were truly ready for it then it is worthwhile to understand which parts where truly down to you (skills, traits, behaviors and even take a hard and honest look at mistakes) and what was really not to do with you. What do I mean by that? Simply put, culture and trends, was the country, firm or team trending in a certain way? Always understand the external environment that you are operating in. Secondly, did others have false perceptions about who you are or what you are capable of? Understand what is really you and what is imagined about you and then try your best to close that gap positively and navigate the rest of it as gracefully as possible.

Lastly, make sure the system is not flawed and that meritocratic processes are in place so that a clear and fair promotional criteria will reward those who deserve the job.

It is not lost on me that while writing this advice to you that politics does not abide by these rules, but I am confident that good firms do, so as Goethe said ” Choose wisely, your choices are brief but endless.” My advice for reviewing 2016 and planning for 2017 is exactly that.

If you are interested in hiring an Executive Coach to help you navigate your career then please contact nicki@glasshammer2.wpengine.com for a no obligation chat to discuss options

woman sitting at deskThe business world is still dominated by men. Sure, we’ve made inroads into the executive level, but we fill few seats — especially in the science field and the corner office.

Yet the statistics tell another story. Not only are we keeping pace with men in the boardroom, but we also run circles around them. Last year, Philadelphia venture capital firm First Round Capital unveiled findings that startup firms featuring at least one woman founder outperform those with solely male founding teams by 63 percent. And women play roles in the upper echelons of First Round’s 10 most valuable companies.

To vault forward in science (or any industry, for that matter), we need to look differently at leadership and our gender. Men and women aren’t wired the same, and to get where I am today, I’ve had to do things that don’t necessarily come naturally.

Women as Pioneers

Women leaders are trailblazers — the more we assert ourselves as leaders, the more other women will follow.

I didn’t realize I was breaking new ground until my daughter, a recent college graduate, said to me: “Mom, you know something? You’re a pioneer. When you were rising throughout the leadership ranks in the ’80s and early ’90s, the ratio of women leaders to men leaders was extremely low.”

She told me that a professor of hers had asked the students to raise their hands if their mothers held a senior leadership role in a company. Out of nearly 50 students in my daughter’s class, she was the only one whose hand went up. She told me, “Mom, you are a unicorn.” I never looked at myself that way. And personally, it meant so much to me to know that I stood out in her mind and had such a deep impact.

As women, we’re still dismissed on the basis of our emotional, connected nature. And our people-centered leadership styles are looked down upon by men — the very people who are often making the decisions about promotions and hiring.

Men vs. Women

Looking back on my career, I know there are some things I could have and should have adjusted that would have made it easier to advance. Growing up with only brothers, I believed I had a leg up on many other aspiring female professionals. But in terms of business, I didn’t really know the difference between a man and a woman. I thought, “I’m just a different sex, but we’re all equal.”

That thinking is a bit backward — even in today’s diverse world. Men and women behave and act differently in every situation. And as professional women, we need to embrace this fact and work it to our advantage. Back when I entered my field, I didn’t really take note of my female tendencies, and I strongly believe it may have held me back.

Leveraging Our Strengths

By nature, we aren’t nearly as boastful as men. We often recognize people around us as opposed to recognizing ourselves. But we need to be able to talk the talk and walk the walk. We need to sell ourselves as strong thinkers and business leaders.

We need to understand our value and make sure we can represent it correctly, whether it’s in front of a board of directors or our senior management. In general, we’re not programmed this way in our DNA, so we need to recognize how important this is and show our value in every aspect of our jobs.

We are much more conscious of physical responsibility and the people element in business and life. Women in a business setting will often say, “How are you doing, and how can I help?” We won’t find a man doing that.

And we don’t need to hear that we’re better than men. We need to know that we’re different and that in certain roles, that difference makes us stronger and “better.” Of course, the opposite is true, too; men are better than us at some jobs.

But we need to think about where our strengths are and leverage those advantages. Recognizing this will put us in front of investors and business leaders and boost our careers.

Our Path Forward

What can we do to build upon the foundation set by our predecessors and ensure that future women will carry on to greater success?

1. We have to work twice as hard as men. This is not only because we’re trying to overcome some of our natural tendencies, but also because it’s still a male-dominated world.

2. We need to be more selfish. We’re raised to be selfless; we don’t think of ourselves first. But speaking louder is the only way we’ll break into the boardroom. In a room full of men, we need to be heard.

3. We have to assume we’re all the same and that we deserve the same treatment. We should take more risks and wait until someone says “no” rather than avoid confrontation. Sure, we ask for more responsibility. But we don’t ask for or expect a raise or promotion to go along with that added responsibility.

4. We need to cultivate our passions and find a way to make a difference within that arena. Invest in a passion, build a business or project around it, and use it within a brand. It will help us get noticed and stand out in front of a group of men.

5. We need to work together and empower one another to build success among women. Springboard Enterprises is a great resource for women with an entrepreneurial spirit, and it’s not necessarily just for entrepreneurs — it’s for any woman who wants the firepower to move ahead in business.

We need to be pioneers for other women; it’s the only way to close the gender gap that still exists. The more we assert ourselves as leaders, take risks, and let our passion do the talking, the sooner “our day” will come when we will not only be 50 percent of the population, but also 50 percent of the leaders driving change in the world!

Valerie Palmieri was appointed president and CEO of Vermillion in January 2015 and joined the company in October 2014. She brought with her more than 30 years of experience in the diagnostic laboratory industry, holding sales, operations, and executive leadership positions in laboratory service and consulting organizations.

Image via Shutterstock - Business woman/Career Advice

Image via Shutterstock

I am very guilty of living in the future and this can lead to not being 100% engaged in the present. I justify it by saying that I am a good planner who understands that companies don’t build themselves and argue that the power of an arc in anyone’s professional narrative is part of one’s brand. My executive coach (yes, I am an executive coach who has an executive coach, because I can’t say it enough, everyone can benefit from having one) and several close friends might argue that I am a malcontent. We are all right as there is a fine line between strategy and sabotage regarding your own career plans and happiness in life.

It turns out that neuroscience confirms that seeking out new situations is very much a part of what the brain is supposed to do. Neuroscientist Jaak Panskepp argues that of seven core instincts in the human brain (anger, fear, panic-grief, maternal care, pleasure/lust, play, and seeking), seeking is the most important.

Here are three reasons to live in the present:

1) You may actually have what you want professionally (and personally). Write down your ideal life in a realistic way or aspects of it and map that against your situation and you might see you are closer than you think and if not, then you at least can see where some gaps are and then you can go back to seeking, happily.

2) You may not have what you want, but you may have what you need. See above, this mapping exercise can help you see the positive aspects of your current situation. For example, if you have young kids and you want to see them more then weigh up if you really want that job that requires 80% travel.

3) There is a certainty in the present that you cannot guarantee with a future potential job. The devil you know and all that. You can also get real perspective on the situation to know if you need change or if you are forging change for the sake of it.

To be coached by Nicki Gilmour, CEO of theglasshammer and executive coach or by her coach and vetted partner Valerie Cherneski, contact Nicki today on 646 6882318 or nicki@theglasshammer.com