Sexual Harassment: How Can Men Help Prevent it?

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sexual harassment

Guest contributed by Jim Morris, WMFDP, Chief Curriculum Officer

In our current political and cultural context women are emboldened – on an historically unprecedented level – to call out the toxic behavior of male colleagues.

What many men are now learning about second hand through the news is a reality women have lived with since entering the workforce over a century ago. Now that the floodgates have opened there is a reckoning taking place: As more and more women speak-up about their harassment experience, others feel supported in coming forth with their stories. This has led to a wave of solidarity, where women are also communicating more with each other on how to approach this problem. One example is the 13 million dollar legal fund for women in low-wage jobs, that was recently announced by a coalition of women in the entertainment industry.

Many of the women who are coming forward were offered financial settlements in exchange for their silence. This sends an unmistakable message that their employers were willing to tolerate harassment without real consequence. What would have been the response had these men committed an equally egregious ethical or procedural breach of another type, like misappropriation of funds, or ignoring a safety issue? Would it have been overlooked, swept under the rug, or treated as confidential? Instead of creating organizational cultures that have a true zero tolerance policy for sexual assault or harassment, we’re living in a world where, until now, it’s been acceptable to quietly collude in a cover up if the perpetrator has enough money, status and power to make the issue go away. This is privilege run amok. Proposed legislation in California that would benefit non-disclosure agreements in these settlements is one possible solution.

So how did we get here? One aspect is the cultural conditioning men receive from a very young age, which entails gaining prestige by cultivating a “cowboy” atmosphere that excludes and often diminishes women. This can range from simply favoring men for leadership roles or drowning out female voices in meetings, (labeled “loudership” in a Harvard Business Review article), to outright objectification, harassment or assault. It’s a systemic issue that is bigger than a few bad actors. Though it’s easy to point a finger at the egregious offenders who make headlines, what about the role that other men play in perpetuating the culture that allows this behavior to flourish? This is a time for men to ask ourselves individually how we have contributed to an environment that has allowed a large number of high profile men to engage in this behavior, over the course of careers that often span decades.

One of the more insidious dimensions of this is unconscious bias. Confronting this requires cultivating a mindfulness of the way one’s own culture and identity shapes behavior and perception. It calls for working with discomfort and sitting with those feelings. At White Men As Full Development Partners, we approach unconscious bias by suggesting the real work before us is to better understand our own privilege and the way other factors like gender and racial conditioning impact how we feel about and view each other. For example, white men don’t typically pay as much attention to their appearance at work, and they are rarely judged as being incompetent because of how they dress. Yet we know from research that the perception of a woman’s competence at work is much more connected to their appearance than their male counterparts. Women are under a lot more pressure to literally “look the part” in order to establish credibility at work. (4)

Another skill that’s crucial to develop is the courage to identify problematic behavior, and speak up to disrupt it. This gets back to the importance of fostering an awareness of how perceptions and realities differ depending on different aspects of your identity. Something that might seem innocuous to a man might actually be experienced as intimidating or inappropriate to a woman or member of a marginalized group. Recognizing that everyone has the right to feel safe and valued in the workplace (and beyond) sets the stage for this approach. The idea is not that men are fundamentally flawed, but rather, are in need of some perspective on how other groups experience life in a white male dominated culture.

Though it’s tempting to think this issue can be addressed with a two hour workshop or online learning module, the reality is that it’s an ongoing process and a long-term commitment. The research, however, says that behavior change isn’t fixed by “training” alone; it’s fixed by helping people learn to first courageously examine and then consciously shift their mindsets. Individual behavior change is a lengthy and deeply personal process. The assumption that training will eradicate a culture of collusion and protection isn’t realistic. Instead, our approach is to begin by examining how the power, privilege and status that each of us wields may impact the way we lead and partner with others. You can’t change behavior without shifting mindsets, and there is no ‘quick fix’ when it comes to that work.

We also need to ask ourselves what men can do to help prepare the next generation? What can be taught to children by men (and women) to preempt some of the sexual harassment endemic to our culture? This behavior starts at a young age because boys want to connect and want to gain status with each other, so we need to find ways for them to do that in positive ways, where there’s space to be vulnerable. Traditionally, discussions on sexual harassment have tended to frame this as a “women’s issue,” and changing that perception is crucial to this process. This entails examining the impact this behavior has on men as well as women, and on the success and health of systems we work within and depend on, from the private sector to government and beyond.

About White Men As Full Diversity Partners (WMFDP):

WMFDP is a diversity and leadership development firm founded in 1996 by Bill Proudman, Michael Welp, Ph.D., and Jo-Ann Morris in Portland, Oregon. WMFDP takes an unorthodox approach towards eradicating bias and discrimination in the workplace. Its client list includes Alaska Airlines, Dell, Lockheed Martin, Northwestern Mutual, Rockwell Automation, Chevron Drilling & Completions, The Nature Conservancy, MassMutual, and others.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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Rising Star: Sue Reager | CEO, Translate Your World

Sue Reager“People are right when they say, ‘If you fall, get back up again,’” says Sue Reager.

Her strategy after failing? To mope for a few days, then stand up and say to herself, “Okay, was the direction I was traveling worth pursuing, or should I go somewhere else? And if the destination is the same, is there another path to get there?

“It really is true that when you fall down, you just say ‘Drat!,’ and get back up again,” she says, a philosophy that has paved her successful and innovative career path.

A Varied Career, Focused on Finding the Perfect Fit

Reager’s career path has always been one of blazing her own trails, starting with becoming a professional choreographer at age 14. She started college, but midway through began teaching college instead, which she says was her first discovery that it is possible to follow a different path when you use your initiative.

After teaching her second year, she realized that the 10th year would essentially be the same as the first and she needed a new challenge, so she set her sights on a career switch and spent the next 20 years working for major media in 34 cities and 17 countries.

“I was told that it was not acceptable for women to work around the world — — however I went anyway. I would definitely never call those the ‘good old days,’,” she says, noting that was the moment that she learned she could make her own decisions, take care of herself and face the world without fear.

Along the way she discovered that because people do business in their own language, she had to study languages every night — grammar, verb conjugations, pronouns, adjectives – all the idiosyncrasies of various languages. But that can be daunting since it takes three to five years to learn to speak a language well enough to efficiently conduct business.

When she was invited to go to Korea on year 20 of her global jaunt, she realized that she didn’t want to start all over again learning a new language and instead returned to the United States determined to solve the language problem.

Opening Up a World of Possibilities

Her first step was to learn how to code, which allowed her to offer her services in code correction for major tech companies that were localizing applications into other languages, but were finding their code was altering the target language. She learned over time that the developer engineers were all making the same mistakes and that what they coded would never work in Japanese, Korean or other Asian languages. Upon further research, she determined that all of these developers were following what they had learned at the university, and the books were wrong.

That discovery led to her first invention, which was a way to localize extremely complex audio products like telephone systems without touching the code.

Then she began to help the speech industry by providing voices and special recordings that create the phonetic information required to generate text-to-speech technology. Her efforts led to her latest invention that is the successful integration of the great language companies of the world under one “roof,” resulting in truly excellent business applications that create cross-language communication.

It was around age 40 that Reager discovered she had something to offer the world that she had not yet recognized. “I am an inventor with a brilliant mind,” she says, adding that this realization was like a seismic shock. And, as she says, life has been really fun ever since, with a reason to leap out of bed every morning.

Right now her company is pioneering four inventions and three software programs designed to bridge the communication gap and thus enable one person to provide global education, customer service, tech support, medical professional language support and more effective 911 emergency services worldwide in dozens of languages.

“To me it is almost beyond exciting that using our software will allow one teacher to teach in 78 languages through live real-time subtitles,” she says. The company has also created a way for small business to attract and serve customers who speak other languages; in the past only huge companies could effectively expand globally due to the expense of translation and the need for special personnel to be hired to service those customers. Her company’s software takes over that job, enabling a small company to communicate, sell and serve around the world.

Reager’s company adds an additional focus: that of empowering wounded veterans to perform fulfilling jobs, as well as enable those who are deaf or blind to work in business on equal footing. “Our invention is revolutionary in this respect,” she says.

Moreover, they have invented a device called the “Eye-Belt” that is a belt that acts as eyes for blind people, telling them how to maneuver around obstacles. As more features are added, it will also tell the blind more about the person in front of them. “Our goal is to provide a new freedom to people who have been limited in the past,” she says.

A Company Culture Devoted to Equality

One of the reasons Reager believes her company has been so successful is because it is run on the basis of consensus, which is more of a Japanese style of doing business, and means that everyone involved needs to agree on a given direction. Anyone who feels strongly that the direction is wrong is encouraged to fight for their viewpoint, because there is probably a good reason for it.

“The concept of equality permeates our company culture,” she says. “Each voice has equal weight and equal merit, and if one person accidentally tries to overpower another, we simply pull the rug out from under them. We are very honest with each other, and we do not criticize.” Without levels of hierarchy, the lines blur between the “worker bees” and executives, eliminating commands and “royal decrees.”

This equality in the office is a perfect metaphor for the equality they are trying to create by removing language barriers around the world.

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Getting What You Want in 2018

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Nicki-Gilmour-bioBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

Happy New Year!

Most of us have new resolutions and all of them will rely on a behaviorial change in their essence, as they require action. If you have figured out what you want (and what you don’t want) and have named this as a future state, then congratulations, the first part is done. But, now the goals are on paper, will you behaviorally do what you need to do to really achieve them?

The good news is that you are in charge of your choices.

The bad news is that your unconscious mind can totally hijack best laid plans by creating competing agendas. How does this show up? What saboteurs are lurking? What fears do you harbor that stop you from achieving your goals? Well, subtle behavioral conflict often happens and what you don’t do to meet your goals is worth deeper examination.

Changing or leaving your job is a common example of where you may espouse that you want to change jobs but here you are two years later still in the same spot. Maybe you have been looking, maybe you have even sent out a few resumes, but my bet is that there is truly something within yourself stopping you from doing what you need to do to get what you want. This might look like logic on the surface, like you tell yourself you don’t have time to network or you need more experience to apply. But, the interesting part of all of this is that in reality you are probably holding assumptions and beliefs that are stopping you from actioning your goals. Continuing with the “logic”, the “no time” reason is usually about a fear, and this can be anything from fear of not getting the job, to fear of not performing in the job, to even just a baseline rejection issue as well as many things including fear of what the next workplace culture might be. Sticking with “the devil you know” comes up more than you can imagine for people. Many of my clients are amazing, talented, experienced executives – women and men from different industries and they are also very human. We are all a product of our past experiences and our cultural benchmarks that often scar us from the cradle to the grave with “the way it is.”

Now, that is not to say that systemic factors are not at play, from biased hiring processes to saturation in your marketplace and turbulent external conditions. But, people get hired in up and down markets and it is the internal dialogue that you have with yourself that matters. Mindset work is key, as by understanding your own paradigms and mental models you can truly formulate practical strategies. I say this because I spent significant time in the past several years studying and researching why people fail to execute on their espoused plans from organization diversity plans to individuals who want things to change. The psychology of saying one thing and doing another is fascinating but we all do it to some extent and it happens because of cognitive dissonance or competing agendas propped up by deep implicit beliefs.

So, if you want to get to a different, better, future place than where you are now, please call me for an exploratory chat as we now have a full service sister coaching firm – Evolved People Coaching and we would be happy to find the right coach for you.

Here is to a great 2018!

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Voice of Experience: Allison Nathan | Managing Director, Goldman Sachs

Allison NathanBy Cathie Ericson

Over the years, Goldman Sachs’ Allison Nathan has learned that although you have to be dedicated and proficient in most areas, you don’t have to excel in everything. “You have to focus on your strengths and interests and think creatively about finding opportunities to leverage them,” she says.

Reflecting upon her experience joining the research division, Nathan notes that she was one of the only people on her team that did not have a PhD in economics. However, she soon realized she had other strengths that would differentiate her and allow her to contribute to the group. Connecting the dots across research views proved to be one of them.

“It’s no coincidence that people tend to enjoy doing what they do well,” Nathan says. That knowledge led her to create an entirely new research product that has become a standalone brand.

Parlaying Her Knowledge into a New Product

Nathan joined Goldman Sachs as a first-year analyst in 1998, after earning an MA from the Johns Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies and a BA from Duke University.

Goldman Sachs had long been an aspirational firm for her, so she jumped at an opportunity to join. Since she had always had an interest in geopolitics as well as economics, she joined the commodities research team, which she found to be a great fit for those interests.

After working her way up in commodities research over 14 years, including being named a managing director, she launched a research product called “Top of Mind,” a publication that leverages both internal content from Goldman Sachs research analysts and external content from influential experts. In each issue, she and her team develop content that focuses on a specific market-moving theme, ranging from Fed balance sheet policy to trade wars to bitcoin.

“It was very rewarding to start out on a traditional path and then have the ability to create a unique opportunity that really leveraged my strengths,” she says. “I felt strongly this type of product was something we were missing, and while it was initially difficult convincing some audiences that there would be traction, the series has been consistently well-received for over five years now.”

Indeed, its success has allowed Nathan to expand Top of Mind into a thought leadership “brand,” and she is currently working on a fifth conference that is part of the publication’s evolution. Top of Mind forums are held periodically to bring the publication’s ethos of discussion and debate to life within a conference setting that features roundtable discussions with individuals from Goldman Sachs’ research division. The team also now produces a podcast series. “Offering content in different mediums has been an exciting aspect of the brand’s development,” she says.

Helping Others Build Successful Careers

Nathan has been a beneficiary of the women’s networks she has leveraged throughout her time at the firm. Recently, she has been active in Goldman Sachs’ Women’s Career Strategies Initiative (WCSI), which targets high-performing women associates to provide educational and networking opportunities. Through this program, Nathan has had the privilege of mentoring three women who have all recently been promoted.

She notes that mentoring is a powerful tool, and you should leverage your experience to mentor people who work directly for you as much as those with whom you have an arms-length relationship.

Sometimes it can be easier to work with those who aren’t direct reports, as you can be honest and know it won’t affect a day-to-day relationship, but it’s also important to invest in the women on your team, says Nathan. She also finds that while senior women tend to mentor other women, she encourages them to remember it’s also important to mentor men. “You have as much experience and knowledge and as much to offer junior people as the man sitting next to you,” she says.

While she finds that most women tend to anticipate a struggle with work/life balance, her main message is that you can have it all. “I have two kids and a husband who also works full-time. The key is that if you are good at what you do, you’ll find there are opportunities for people to give you the autonomy you need to achieve that balance.”

Much of her time outside the office is spent with her children, ages 7 and 9, but as they become older and more self-sufficient, she now has additional time to focus on other interests. To that end, she has joined the board of DreamYard, a Bronx-based non-profit that works with children to build pathways to opportunity through the arts. She says of this new experience: “I am excited to increase my involvement in DreamYard and help provide more opportunities for these talented students and their families in the Bronx community.”

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Happy New Year!

Happy New Year

Happy New Year!

We are returning to your screens on Monday 9th January but we wanted to share with you the following opportunities:

This is our eleventh year of writing great content, career advice and exploring the research on advancing women at work and to that end we are looking for great writers, guests posts and people to profile.

For profiles: we profile senior women (Voice of experience profiles are for C level, SVP and Managing Directors ) and amazing “Mover and shakers” (VP’s ) in financial and professional services, technology firms and Fortune 1000 companies. We tend to not cover entrepreneurs because we believe the value of the glasshammer and our niche is to inform and empower women when they want to stay in big business and navigate that terrain.

We have themes as well as columns so we are looking for women to profile for Black History Month, Asian Heritage, LGBT leaders to name a few. International Women’s Day is everyday for us but open to posts for the month of March also.

If you want to write (paid as a journalist ) or contribute (non paid as you have a bio for your own expert service at end of column) then email and send unique posts to louise@theglasshammer.com

Finally, we want to tell you about what we have learned eleven years and 8000 articles later investigating how to empower women and their advancement. The conclusion in one word is “coaching”. There is no force more powerful than having a good coach as it pertains to figuring out how to get what you want and have a solidly good time doing it. Nicki Gilmour, CEO and Founder of theglasshammer.com has launched Evolved People Coaching for individuals and groups.

If you want to reserve an exploratory chat at no cost to see if coaching can help you, please email nicki@theglasshammer.com to find a time to talk.

Lets make 2018 the best yet.

Theglasshammer.com team

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