Tag Archive for: sexism

Are After-Work Drinks Sexist in the UK?

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after-work-drinks

Guest Contributed by Beth Leslie

Jeremy Corbyn, the leader of the UK’s Labour Party, recently sparked outrage by labelling after-work socialising as sexist because it “benefits men who don’t feel the need to be at home looking after their children and it discriminates against women who will want to, obviously, look after the children”.

In one fell swoop, he offended everyone. Single women railed at the anachronistic association of all women with housewifery. Mothers were furious by the stereotyped assumption that they are automatically the primary caregivers. Men were offended by the outdated notion that they don’t want to spend time with their children. The British as a nation became hysterical that this left-winged bearded fellow might be trying to take their Thursday night drink away from them.

But then someone pointed out that Carolyn Fairbairn, the first female head of the Confederation of British Industry, had made similar criticisms about after-work culture. Female journalists at the New Yorker and The Independent voiced their agreement too. So is Corbyn actually correct? Are after-work events discriminatory against women?

The Activity vs. The Hour

The debate is particularly problematic because “after-work socialising” means different things to different people. It could be a formal networking event. It could be a casual cocktail with colleagues. Or, as the corporate packages offered by 41% of lap-dancing clubs attest; it could be a client meeting in a strip club.

So while Corbyn’s comments focused on the discriminatory timing of after-work events, many feminist campaigners are more concerned with the nature of these activities. Donald Trump’s recently leaked boasts about sexually harassing women indicates how heartbreakingly common workplace harassment is. 52% of women in the UK say they’ve experienced it, and such harassment is often exacerbated by after-work socialising because it usually involves alcohol and a blurring of the lines between professional and personal life. This problem can exist even within formal networking events, where women complain that many men respond to their networking with flirtation, and where even companies as prominent as Microsoft are curating an environment of objectification by hiring ‘booth babes’.

At the same time, opting out of after-work sessions comes at a cost. Clients are discovered and deals are made at networking events. Bosses give praise and promotions to subordinates they’ve become pally with after a few pints. And co-workers who socialise together build bonds and friendships that drop-outs can feel excluded from.

So yes, there are many aspects of after-work socialising that can be seen as inherently sexist. But the answer cannot be banning all after-work events. Not only would it be impossible to enforce, it is worryingly illiberal. Women-only networking events, meanwhile, seem to partition off the problem more than they solve it.

Businesses Need to Lead a Culture Change

Eliminating sexism from business requires the elevation of the idea that it is not only immoral, but unprofitable. The spate of lawsuits by female professionals who consider a corporate insistence on conducting business in strip clubs detrimental to their career prospects should be encouraged. Companies which engage in sexist practices should be named and shamed on regular and social media. Managers should take complaints of sexual harassment seriously and punish offenders severely. Individuals should be encouraged to speak up when they witness or experience misogyny in the workplace.

It may seem quixotic at first glance, but each hardened opinion contributes to the snowball of social change. After all, most businesses can’t afford to turn off female talent, and even fewer can afford to lose female customers.

The After-Hours Element

Corbyn and his backers, however, appeared to suggest that even the most progressive event is discriminatory if it takes place outside of work hours because of childcare commitments. The problem with this is that it muddles two distinct concepts. Holding an event after hours is not anti-women but anti-parent. However, because of gender stereotypes, working mothers do end up carrying more of the burden than working fathers.

It is the second concept which society and businesses have a duty to eliminate. For companies, this should take the form of implementing and encouraging parental equality policies, such as shared parental leave. Similarly, more work should be done on a social level to equalise the attitudes towards working fathers and working mothers.

Yet turning the plight of an ambitious parent who also wants to spend the evening with their kids into a feminist issue is a mistake, because it further entrenches gender stereotypes about women as homemakers. Ultimately, having children is a choice in the way your gender is not, and exclusion from after-work events because you choose to spend time with your children, however frustrating, is morally distinct from being excluded from after-work events because of sexist perceptions or actions against you.

Advocating for a workplace that is more parent-friendly is a worthy fight and it should not be a sexist one.

Beth Leslie writes graduate careers advice for Inspiring Interns, a recruitment agency which specialises in matching candidates to their dream internship. Check out their graduate jobs London listings for roles, or if you’re looking to hire an intern, have a look at their innovative Video CVs.

Disclaimer: The opinions and views of Guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer

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Does Hollywood’s failure to pass the Bechdel test have a negative effect on the workplace?

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hollywood-signGuest contributed by Beth Leslie

When critiquing the feminist credentials of a film, a good place to start is the Bechdel Test. To pass, a movie must fulfil three simple criteria: It has two named female characters, who talk to each other about something other than a man. Just under half of all films fail.

For comparison, when IMD compiled a list of films that botched the “Reverse-Bechdel Test” they managed to think of four.

Of course, blatant sexism in any aspect of life is distressing in and of itself. But media is influential. How much of an impact does a lack of female investment bankers, superheroes and whip-wielding archaeologists have on the career aspirations of real-life women?

Movies Influence Us

Movies matter. Study after study shows how the film industry can shape and influence politics, constructions of cultural identity and social change. How on-screen women are portrayed, therefore, affects real-life ideas about real-life women.

The Bechdel Test highlights the industry’s shortcomings in this regard: on-screen, women appear half as much as men and speak significantly less than them. They are rarely the lead or even co-lead, and they are over-sexualised and disproportionately young.

Over and over again, therefore, we watch men being dominant and women being marginalised. The idea becomes cemented in our mind, so that when we actually experience men disproportionately directing discussions or taking on positions of responsibility we accept it the norm.

We learn to associate masculinity with leadership and women with “sexy lamps”. When it comes to hiring and promotion decisions, we are already primed to see men as influencers, winners and go-getters. We want our high-fliers to be heroes, so we compare candidates against our established notions of what a hero looks like.

We see quintessential ‘good guys’ – the James Bonds, the Tony Starks – repeatedly sexualise the women they work with and think that such behaviour is acceptable. We search for examples of heroines who are over thirty-five or intellectually superior and, finding none, disparage experience and intellect as valid indicators of a women’s worth.

Women Don’t Work in Films

Work and the workplace is often represented in films, and it is usually depicted as an unrealistically masculine space. Male characters are notably more likely to have an identifiable job than female characters. They are also substantially more likely to occupy senior roles – women make up just 3% of fictional C-Suite executives. Of the 129 influential family films identified by the above study, not one showed a female character at the top of the financial, legal, journalism or political sector. (In contrast, there were 45 depictions of powerful male politicians alone.)

Gender stereotypes are endemic in film. In the hospital wards of Hollywood, 89% of nurses are women but only 10% of doctors are. The number of female engineers, soldiers, and officials is so low as to almost be negligible. The suggestion is therefore that women aren’t workers, and they certainly aren’t successful workers. By associating career progression so strongly with men, the movie industry depicts working itself is a “masculine” trait. Considering we learn about the world through media, this is disturbing.

Of course, women are underrepresented in senior positions and masculine professions, but not to the extent they are on-screen. This suggests that Hollywood is not so much reflecting reality as reflecting a conception of reality where different genders conform to markedly different life paths. By exaggerating existing stereotypes, it amplifies the pressure to conform to said stereotypes.

We Are Limited by Our Expectations

We grow up watching TV, and it influences our dreams and ambitions. Little girls seem particularly susceptible to emulating the actresses they see on screen – one study found that admiring a star whose characters’ smoke vastly increases the risk of becoming a smoker. Such admiration is particularly problematic if many of the characters we identify with are deficient in ambition and career success.

We cannot be what we cannot see, and the lack of professional representations of women, particularly in the boardroom or STEM industries, makes it harder for young women to conceptualise themselves as such figures. Movies show girls a version of happiness which involves playing the sidekick of a successful man, so women who want to be happy learn to copy this formula. Movies show young girls visions of themselves as pretty PAs or charming caregivers, and suggest that this is what women should be.

There is a solution: put more women in the film industry. When women create films, they invariably pass the Bechdel Test (and other measures of gender equality) with flying colours. Unfortunately, sexism has worked its wrecking hand here too: just 7% of directors, 20% of writers and 23% of producers are women.

Beth Leslie writes graduate careers advice for Inspiring Interns, a recruitment agency which specialises in matching candidates to their dream internship. Check out their graduate jobs London listings for roles, or if you’re looking to hire an intern, have a look at their innovative Video CVs.

Disclaimer: The opinions and views of Guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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Being a Role Model Isn’t Enough, Stop Being Sexist!

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Two-thirds-of-women-in-fund-management-have-experience-sexism-finds-FTfm-surveyBy Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

My consistent discovery in my ten years of this work is that women are often serious perpetrators when it comes to sexism against women, albeit quite unconsciously by buying into stereotypes and deferring all authority to any male on most subjects.

Bell Hooks says it best in her excerpt of a book called The Will to Change about why the system of patriarchy is an ugly one that if reinforced by whoever, we will never make progress.

She makes the point which escapes most people which is until we stop denying that we live in an underlying system that stacks the cards against gentle boys in favor of endorsing a tougher, rougher version which as its worst is ‘toxic masculinity’ then we can do whatever we want, but it will be a lose/lose for all concerned.

So what are 3 things you can do today to walk the talk of “Being the change that you want to see in the world?”
  • Break stereotypes when and where you see them being flung around. Men aren’t all left brain, women aren’t all right brain and that Mars and Venus nonsense is insulting.
  • Be yourself and speak from the heart and on brave days speak truth to power as safely as you can.
  • Play the game but only to play enough to change the game so that tomorrow and the next day, the game is less ridiculous for others.
What are 3 things that you have to stop doing?
  • Don’t give a wider behavioral range to your sons with a boys will be boys attitude yet narrowly confine your daughters to defined and different behavioral criteria.
  • Don’t put up with casual sexism at work or home- Casual sexism or micro aggressions are often invisible and so part of the culture that you dont even realize that it is happening. Learn how to spot it and disrupt it on the spot.
  • Don’t regale every boy and man you see with the authority to be the expert, or even to have an opinion on everything. Mansplaining is boring and happens because we all allow men to think if they read a sentence of a topic that you have to listen to them even if you have a Phd in the subject.

Not everyone has the same appetite to be a change agent and that’s ok. But, please know that if you are colluding then you are part of the problem. Something to think about today!

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Mansplaining: It’s Time to Interrupt

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Business meeting with women and menMansplaining. If you’ve lived and breathed in this world as a woman, you’ve experienced it. If you work in a male-dominated office, it might be served up as a daily side with your coffee.

Recently, Chicago Tribune workplace columnist Rex Huppke declared: “Mansplaining — whether you like the term or not — is real. That’s not up for debate.”

Huppke called it “a slow drip of sexism”. How much is your office environment dripping with it?

What is Mansplaining, exactly?

In The Salon, Benjamin Hart argued that the term “mansplaining” lost its potency, as well as its real utility within gender dynamics discussions, when it became popularly used and broadly defined as a man explaining something to a women in a condescending or patronizing manner.

Hart asserts it’s morphed into an “increasingly vague catchall expression” of “men saying things to, or about, women.”

“Mansplain” is thrown about liberally. Jimmy Kimmel mansplained speech coaching to Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton. The Financial Times recently referred to the EU referendum in the UK as at risk of becoming a “giant exercise in ‘mansplaining’”, due to media domination by male voices. Women called for Trump to mansplain his Clinton “women card” accusation. Even a collection of mansplaining moments shows a diversity of takes on what it is.

Merriam Webster takes a hard line on its specific definition: “when a man talks condescendingly to someone (especially a woman) about something he has incomplete knowledge of, with the mistaken assumption that he knows more about it than the person he’s talking to does.”

Other than a sinking feeling in your stomach and increasing desire to find a conversational back door, what are the tell-tale signs of mansplaining?

1) It feels like a “manologue”

One sure-fire sign you’re being mansplained to: you’re not speaking or discussing. Instead, you are being spoken at or spoken over, often for a frustrating duration of time.

Mansplaining carries a trademark air of wisdom-wielding, knowledge-imparting, and time-taking. You may also have the feeling of being verbally cut-across.

Mansplaining, in a two-step conversational dominance maneuver, often follows immediately after manterruption – “unnecessary interruption of a woman by a man”.

A 2014 informal experiment by empirical linguist Kieran Snyder in a tech workplace found that in conversations of four or more, men interrupted at twice the rate women did, and were three times more likely to interrupt women than men. (Women interrupt women, too.)

Dr. Arin N. Reeves also conducted an observational study across 41 hours of meetings, calls, and panel discussions. Not only did Reeves observe that men interrupt far more, but also that 89.3% of men’s interruptions of women (and only 42.6% of men’s interruptions of men) were intrusive interruptions – “intentionally or unintentionally usurping the speaker’s turn at talk with the intent of ceasing the speaker’s ability to finish organically.”

Women were most commonly intrusively manterrupted on panel discussions, although men weren’t “aware” of doing it. Less than 1/5th of all women’s interruptions of anyone were intrusive.

2) It wasn’t solicited

Mansplaining is not a direct question followed by a direct explanatory answer. That’s just explaining.

Mansplaining is more of an unsolicited espousing of lengthy information and proffered opinions, which seeks to ensnare you in its immanent glow of intelligence, and which may or may not follow a question.

In the Chicago Tribune article, Elly Shariat, founder and CEO of shariatPR, tells of a former boss who pulled her aside to advise on the health implications of her shoe choices, for example.

3) Major assumptions are at play

The biggest thing about mansplaining is that it’s based on a culturally embedded assumption. At the core, men often assume they know more or better than women, and culture mirrors this.

Although she didn’t coin the word itself, mansplaining’s popular origin is attributed to Rebecca Solnit’s 2008 essay entitled “Men Explain Things to Me”, in which she tells about a cocktail party experience where a man asked her a question about her writing and then interrupted her to tell her at length about a very important book that she should read – which turned out to be her book, and he hadn’t even read it, just the review.

Solnit wrote, “Men explain things to me, and to other women, whether or not they know what they’re talking about. Some men. Every woman knows what I’m talking about. It’s the presumption that makes it hard, at times, for any woman in any field, that keeps women from speaking up and from being heard when they dare; that crushes young women into silence by indicating, the way harassment on the street does, that this is not their world. It trains us in self-doubt and self-limitation just as it exercises men’s unsupported overconfidence.”

What can we do about it?

No matter how narrowly or broadly you define it, mansplaining reinforces a power imbalance. It reinforces the male domination of meeting conversations and rewarding of men for talking more.

Here’s a thought: interrupting mansplaining might be a necessary, career-building skill.

In her experiment, Snyder found that women interrupt less and very rarely interrupt men (only 13% of the time). But which women were entirely responsible for that 13% of interrupting men? The only three senior women in the study – who all interrupted men (as well as women). In fact, these women were three of the four biggest interruptors in the study.

Snyder wrote, “The results suggest that women don’t advance in their careers beyond a certain point without learning to interrupt, at least in this male-dominated tech setting.”

The most empowering thing women can do when faced with mansplaining?

Put acquiescence away. Interrupt this nonsense, and be heard.

By Aimee Hansen

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