Tag Archive for: gratitude

capacity equationModern leadership demands more than managing time and tasks. It requires being a master of personal capacity, and this is a matter of leading yourself first and foremost so that you can effectively and organically lead others, projects, or communities. For women in leadership, particularly in high-stakes industries like finance or law, the ability to protect and expand energy is a decisive leadership skill.

Female leaders are disproportionately at risk for burnout due to both visible and invisible labor (balancing intense workloads with emotional awareness, organizational care, familial responsibilities, and relationships). According to Deloitte’s survey Women @ Work: A Global Outlook, more than half of women in leadership roles report feeling burned out and for many, their stress levels are increasingly growing. The message is glaringly obvious that time management is no longer enough. Sustainable performance and success requires a new approach: energy intelligence.

Rethinking the Capacity Equation

Capacity can be thought of as the dynamic relationship between what fuels and what depletes. While time is finite and we cannot create more of it, capacity is expandable, but only with intention. When leaders continuously expend more than they replenish, they move into cognitive fatigue, emotional depletion, and eventually, diminished impact.

Neuroscience has long shown that chronic stress impairs access to the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for focus, empathy, and decision-making. When leaders operate in constant overdrive, they are quite literally functioning with less of their brain available. In a chronically stressed-out state of being, loss of resilience and cognitive rigidity are symptoms that may arise in response to the mental overload. The cost isn’t just personal, it ripples into the culture of teams and organizations because it derails your capacity to show up as your best self.

The Myth of Infinite Output

In our societal constructs, the path to success has been built on proving worth and value through unrelenting output. Yet this model is not sustainable and no longer necessary. The most effective leaders today aren’t those who give endlessly, but those who replenish strategically.

High-performing women who learn to manage their capacity shift from running on adrenaline and overcommitting to leading from alignment. They understand that clarity, creativity, and calm are not luxuries; they’re the foundation for performance that lasts let alone their own fulfillment.

Three Shifts to Expand Capacity

1. Move from time management to energy stewardship.

Traditional productivity frameworks focus on optimizing hours and hacks. But energy is made up of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being, and it’s what determines the quality of those hours. As Tony Schwartz and Catherine McCarthy argue in Harvard Business Review’s “Manage Your Energy, Not Your Time”, sustained performance comes from rhythmic renewal, not relentless effort. Intentionality is critical when it comes to designing each day around energetic pulls (demands on your energy) and extends (where you choose to give your energy).

Energy stewardship starts with awareness. We can regularly ask: Which activities energize me? Which consistently drain me? The answers reveal where to realign work, connections, and personal times toward what fuels vitality and effectiveness. Over time, prioritizing high-energy activities, such as creative endeavors, mentoring, and strategic thinking, creates greater output with less depletion.

2. Replace routines with intentional rituals.

Routines are autopilot behaviors done to check a box; rituals are conscious choices done to refuel. When leaders infuse intention into daily transitions like beginning the day, entering meetings, or closing the laptop, they create micro-moments of renewal.

Small rituals, like three deep breaths before a presentation, brewing coffee or tea in the present moment without a phone in hand, or a five-minute gratitude practice at the end of the day, reset the nervous system and sharpen focus. Rather than look at intentional pauses as inefficiencies where we could be doing something else, we need to see them as self-leadership strategies and energetic hygiene. They enable leaders to meet the next challenge with more presence and grounding instead of reactivity.

3. Shift from proving to preserving.

The instinct to prove competence, reliability, or capability is deeply ingrained, especially among women who’ve navigated demanding environments. Cultivating influence is about preservation through protecting the clarity, energy, and perspective that empowers leaders to operate at their highest level.

Preserving energy is not a retreat from ambition; it’s how ambition endures through inner alignment. Leaders who set boundaries, delegate strategically, and integrate rest model sustainable success for their teams. They demonstrate that resilience isn’t built in exhaustion, rather it’s built in recovery.

The New Leadership Power

Sustainable leadership is not about doing less, slowing down, or being less ambitious. Instead it’s about leading differently, and redefining power as the ability to remain centered, clear, and effective under pressure. When women leaders learn to manage their capacity, they not only elevate their own performance but also set a new cultural standard that well-being and excellence are not competing values.

The next era of leadership will not be defined by who can push the hardest, but by who can sustain the longest. Energy stewardship is not a personal wellness tactic, it’s a professional strategy and alignment is the future of leadership.

By: Erin Coupe is the author of I Can Fit That In and host of the podcast with the same name.

(Guest Contribution: The opinions and views of guest contributions are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com)

muay thai leadershipAfter moving to Singapore and stepping away from the intense pace of fintech leadership, I found unexpected lessons in Muay Thai, a sport that one needs to study the underlying culture to truly understand. Over a five-year period, I visited Thailand thirty times and interviewed world champion boxers such as Muay Thai Legend Chanchai Sor Tamarangsri.

Here are eight lessons I learnt from studying Muay Thai that apply to business.

1. Be conscious of your body language

Shattered after a gruelling few months running a financial technology software company, I decided to take a short break to train in Thailand. On the first morning, I was sitting on the side of the boxing ring at 7 a.m. at Rawai Muay Thai waiting for my class to start, stressing about next week’s meeting with my co-founders, which promised to be unpleasant.

The sun had already reached 38 degrees and I was the first student in the gym. One of the trainers was walking past when he abruptly stopped. He looked at me and said, “Better go home.” Taken aback, I challenged, “Why?” Putting his hands on my shoulders, he pushed me bolt upright, took my hands out of my lap where they were knotted together and lifted my chin. “Your body tells me, you can’t fight” he replied. “It looks small and weak. Think strong and you will be. If you can’t do that, better go to the beach.”

2. You must be resilient

Muay Thai training is gruelling. Not just the because of the physical aspects but mentally you have to be prepared. All Muay Thai trainers will tell you they can teach a student to have a perfect roundhouse kick, an incredible knee strike, but not courage or “heart”. You have to want to win and believe you can. Fighters that do not have heart may win the first or even the third round, but they are not going to last the distance. You can be smaller than your opponent but your spirit is everything. In fact it’s one with real physical consequences. Fighters lose eyes, suffer head injuries.

No matter how difficult a situation is at work, there are not going to be any physical dangers. No-one is going to knock you out. Turn up to your career like you would a Muay Thai fighter, with heart. If you can’t then perhaps question whether the career you have chosen to succeed in is right for you.

3. There are no short cuts. You have to prepare. You have to practice

Practice, practice, practice. How Muay Thai fighters physiologically approach every session, every exercise – in fact, everything they do – impacts their ability to perform technical skills under stress. They are keyed into what motivates them and drives them forward. Being fully prepared alleviates stress. If you know you have done your best, and have sought feedback from your colleagues and mentors, then there is every reason to believe you are going to succeed.

4. Walk away when you need to

Muay Thai fighters do not win by themselves. Boxing is a team sport and the best trainers love to share their knowledge. They want you to succeed and be the best version of yourself. You need to put the work in and show commitment. Learning Muay Thai is a two-way street, you can’t show up expecting to learn without putting in the effort. If you find yourself at a Muay Thai gym where the trainers are pushing you hard for private classes or on their mobile phones during sessions, walk away. Instantly. You are wasting your time. If you have co-founders who do not share your values, who shirk responsibilities and lie, cut a deal and move on. Muay Thai demands you make decisive decisions fast.

5. Control your emotions

Before entering a ring, Muay Thai fighters still their minds. They are calm. Think about how you would picture the gaze of a Monk, emerging from a mediative state. Envisage how peaceful and free of worry his eyes are. In Thailand, I had the honour of removing Kru Wah’s Mongkhon – a headpiece worn by Thai boxers while performing the pre-fight performance dance. Traditionally, these headpieces are still blessed by a monk and believed to possess special powers to protect and bring good luck to their wearer.

When saying positive words for the battle ahead, I was struck by Kru Wah’s relaxed demeanour. It was as if he had already won and was getting ready for bed after a good meal. Kru Wah’s fight was beautiful to watch. He executed each strike fast and effectively whilst maintaining his prima ballerina assoluta sense of balance. He was precise and exact regardless of the pressure being applied by his opponent.

When making a point or in tense situations, remain calm and take time to observe the body language and micro expressions of the people around you. That way you can better adjust to your audiences’ comments and insights. Have faith in the meeting strategy you have worked on with your colleagues and mentors and you’ll be sure to win the day.

6. Be grateful and give back

Mongkunpet was a young girl when I first met her in 2016. She had already fought 30 amateur boxing matches. At that time she was around 30 kilos. An exceptional athlete, Monkunpet has gone on to win national championship belts. During a fight in Phuket, she badly hurt her foot, breaking several toes. Somehow, she fought through the pain and won the match. The next day she limped into the training arena; formally bowed to each of the 12 teachers in gratitude, and limped out again. If a young girl can do this to thank her teachers, we should be able to find time to show appreciation to the mentors and teachers who selfishly helped us achieve goals. We should make a commitment to have mentees ourselves.

7. Choose a strategy that works for you

Once a Muay Thai boxer has successfully won a number of fights, their trainer will decide which fighting style best suits the student’s temperament. For example, Muay Femur fighters are best known for their high fight I.Q., patience and the ability to move between various styles of execution as needed. They are phenomenal at counterattacks. In contrast, a Muay Mat fighting style involves adopting a forward-moving aggressive approach and deploying explosive punching combinations to ultimately knockout their opponents.

Similarly, in business, you need to think about which competitive strategy works best for you. Are you a deeper thinker who prefers not to rush in, or more on the front foot when it comes to pushing forward your narrative… or neither of the two? Give thought to the type of company culture where you can excel wherever you are on your career journey.

8. Focus

You have to be 100 per cent present in Muay Thai training. It is not like a spin class where you can ponder over your lunch choices. When you have a hectic lifestyle, pressures at work or with juggling family commitments can accumulate and cause stress. Just training a couple of hours a week will make a difference. Because your mind will be at rest from thinking about other people or situations. Learning to focus completely is a terrific way of giving your mind a break.

 

Sally Clarke at her Muay Thai training gym

By: Sally J Clarke is a senior leader in the technology and art sectors. She has received prestigious awards and been invited to contribute to industry initiatives such as: Amazon Web Services Female Founders, (2022/2023), the La Salle College of the Arts Incubator Fund Award (2014), British Tech Advisory and the SunGard (now FIS) CEO Award. Sally frequently share insights on leadership, innovation, and the power of creativity. Her debut novel Ringside Gamble is available on Amazon and all good book stores.

spacious presenceIn life and work, when you feel depleted, overwhelmed, contracted, or lost, what you may be craving is connection—with yourself.

Whereas when you feel spacious in your presence and perception, you are more capable of holding the whole of life: the ups, the downs, the words and behavior of others, the changes of emotional weather within, and the ever-shifting waves of life.

You’re also able to act from a wider vantage point and feel more energetically centered at work and home. You are less reactive to circumstances, not allowing them to dictate your sense of yourself or the world. Instead, you are grounded in your inner truth.

One simple tool for returning to that truth is self-exploratory writing—a practice that invites clarity, emotional spaciousness, and inner alignment.

The Underrated Value of Simple Practices

The habits that serve wellbeing and inner harmony are so basic, so mundane, and so immediately available, we tend to overlook them—good sleep, anyone?—in search of a magic fix or a peak moment experience. Culturally, we undervalue what matters the most.

Burnout is a consequence of a culture, or internalized culture, that does not prioritize wellbeing. Managing burnout becomes a coping strategy. Within that context, self-alignment and self-care are the origin points of a woman who knows her innate value and that the paradigm won’t change unless how you regard yourself does.

Inner spaciousness can be cultivated through practices such as meditation, breathwork, mindfulness, contemplation, myofascial release, dance and movement practices, grounding—and reflective and expressive journaling.

Writing To Support Emotional Wellness

Author Natalie Goldberg wrote to the power of spontaneous writing to access your first thoughts: “The aim is to burn through to first thoughts, to the place where energy is unobstructed by social politeness or the internal censor, to the place where you are writing what your mind actually sees and feels, not what it thinks it should see or feel.”

When we recognize that emotions are energy in motion, we can get curious about them on the page, which can also help clarify what motives are at play in decision-making. Exploring your feelings, especially the ones you often resist, can deepen your self-understanding, expand your emotional bandwidth and resilience, and point you toward aligned action with your values and intuitive knowing.

Reflective and expressive journaling, which focuses on what’s truly on your mind and heart, has been shown to increase emotional awareness and emotional wellness while enhancing your overall outlook. Ultimately, it becomes a practice in emotional intelligence.

Cultivating An Orientation of Gratitude

People who orient in gratitude experience lower levels of stress and depression and better relationships. With practice, you can improve your ability to tap into the state of gratitude, elevating your “set point” of perception.

Practicing gratitude enhances wellbeing—for example, supporting better rest, less inflammation, and peace of mind while reducing symptoms of anxiety or depression.

Writing to express gratitude can help shift attention away from rumination and heavy emotions, and train the brain to more readily access appreciation. Not only this, but the positive effects on mental wellbeing compound like interest, creating accumulating benefits over time.

Processing Complex Emotions

Writing can also help to unwind and process trauma caught in the body’s cellular memory.

When we feel safe, writing about traumatic events or emotional experiences can help to organize chaotic thoughts, release locked-up emotions, and facilitate mental clarity and resilience long term.

Expressive therapeutic writing has also been shown to support physical health and immune function across a range of conditions, while reducing stress, anxiety, and symptoms of PTSD.

Visioning Yourself in Growth

Expressive writing which focuses on self-reflection, gratitude, and imagining a positive future increases experiences of life satisfaction and happiness. In one study, people who journaled for 15 minutes a day felt significantly less anxiety, distress, and depressive symptoms.

When you uncover and explore a new insight on paper, remember a gift that’s gone dormant, or admit future visions or goals for yourself, you are bringing them into your awareness to galvanize energy towards them.

Neuroscience has found that when it comes to goals, people who very vividly describe or picture their goals on paper (men tend to do so more) are significantly (1.2-1.4 times) more likely to achieve those goals. Part of the reason is writing them down improves the biological encoding process by which your hippocampus drops a pin and says, remember this.

Creating Spaciousness Through Reflection

When you put what is inside on paper through reflective journaling, you create spaciousness—within yourself and between you and your thoughts. Often, you can discover how you truly feel through writing and increase your self-awareness.

When you are honest on the page and guided with revealing questions, you have the ability to externalize and explore the narrative, examine triggers, reveal thought and behavior patterns, recognize values, and reveal truths. Increasing your self-awareness, you can begin to see where you are locked into the past, or into thoughts and emotions, so you can come back to presence.

As Goldberg writes, “When you are present, the world is truly alive.”

Start Now: Five Prompts For Embodying Self-Respect

Why not start now? Here are five journaling prompts related to embodying self-respect that you can write to today.

  • What is one way you are keeping your word with yourself? How does it feel? What supports you to honor your intention?
  • What promise to yourself are you bending—or breaking? How does it feel?
  • What nurtures your sense of self that you regularly nourish?
  • What nurtures your sense of aliveness but you are not prioritizing it?
  • What is one thing you ache to give more attention and energy to? What are you doing instead that is a lower investment in your fulfillment?

In the practice of yoga, more than half the task is getting onto the mat. With expressive or reflective writing, more than half the task is getting onto the page.

So often, we stay stuck in the same mental and emotional energetic loops, but self-exploratory journaling in response to powerful questions can open new doors of awareness which allow us into more of ourselves—and more of our lives and our unique leadership.

Aimee Hansen is co-author of This Book Is a Retreat: 101 Soul-Nourishing Questions to Reconnect with Yourself to be released on August 22, 2025 (prior to that, available for pre-order), a co-creation with USA Today bestselling author, Marianne Richmond. She is the founder of Storyteller Within and has led the Journey Into Sacred Expression women’s retreat on Lake Atitlan, Guatemala for the past ten years. As a lover of the questions that open us, she’s inspired hundreds of women in writing their hearts into expansion.

(Guest Contribution: The opinions and views of guest contributions are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com)