Op-ed: If We Want LGBT+ Talent to Succeed, Leaders and Allies Need to Stand Up and Be Counted

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By Jon Terry, Diversity and Inclusion Consulting Leader, PwC UK

Growing up in multicultural London, I saw how diversity can enrich our communities.

My childhood experiences helped to inspire my passion for strengthening diversity and inclusion in the workplace and focus on doing so within my internal and client-facing roles at PwC. From fresh perspectives to stronger engagement and motivation, the power of inclusion is something I see right across my work with colleagues and clients.

What’s also clear to me is that businesses prosper in an environment that enables all their talent to thrive. For LGBT+ talent, as with all employees, this means ensuring that they can realize their full potential without barriers and bias. It also means creating an environment where LGBT+ talent can feel safe to be their true selves and fully participate in the workplace. Just as I can talk openly about my wife and what I did at the weekend, my LGBT+ colleagues should be able to engage with their colleagues without feeling the need to be guarded or closeted.

Are businesses around the world creating an environment where LGBT+ talent can thrive? Are businesses realizing the full benefits? These are some of the key questions addressed in Out to Succeed: Realising the full potential of LGBT+ talent, a survey of corporate leaders and high performing LGBT+ talent, which was carried out earlier in the year by PwC in conjunction with Out Leadership, the global LGBT+ business network.

The case for inclusion

The business case for LGBT+ inclusion comes through loud and clear from the survey findings. Around two-thirds of the LGBT+ employees taking part believe that having a supportive focus on LGBT+ talent has given their organization a better understanding of customers’ wants and needs. Employers are even more emphatic, with nearly 90% believing that a supportive LGBT+ focus has enabled them to gain a better understanding of customer demands.

In a competitive labor market, inclusion is also a talent differentiator – more than 80% of employees believe that having an openly supportive focus on LGBT+ has provided their organization with wider access to the best talent. Almost all the employers we asked agree.

Being your true self

Yet, while progress on inclusion is being made – more than 80% of the LGBT+ employees in our survey feel comfortable being out at work – support for LGBT+ talent is still falling short in many organizations.

One of the most telling findings is the two-year gap between the median age when gay male participants came out to family and friends (age 21) and when they come out at work (age 23). Among women, the gap between coming out in their personal and professional lives is an even wider at five years with the average age of coming out at work then being 26. This reluctance to be their true selves at work should be a cause for concern for companies that think they’re doing enough to create a safe and supportive environment.

It’s also telling that even among the openly LGBT+ talent in our survey, a high proportion prefer to cover aspects of their lives and behave in a guarded way in the workplace. Two in five avoid mentioning their life outside work. One in three have kept quiet when they’ve heard negative comments about LGBT+ people. The fact that so many LGBT+ professionals remain guarded not only hinders organizations in recruitment and retention, but, more importantly, this hinders the careers of LGBT+ professionals.

Realizing potential

And this uncertainty extends to opportunities for advancement. Career progression is the number one priority for the LGBT+ developing leaders in our survey. The majority according to the survey, see LGBT+ specific training and development programs as important elements in making them want to work for an organization. Yet, less than 30% of the businesses we surveyed have programs specifically focused on the retention, development and progression of LGBT+ talent. Many of the LGBT+ employees who do have access to such programs aren’t even aware that they exist.

It is our belief that if LGBT+ employees don’t feel they can realize their full potential within their current organization, they will vote with their feet by looking for opportunities elsewhere. In turn, businesses will miss out – only 35% of the LGBT+ employees in our survey believe that their company leverages LGBT+ inclusion for business advantage.

True inclusion

So how can businesses give LGBT+ talent the confidence they can succeed within their organizations? Drawing on the survey findings, the Out to Succeed report sets out five key recommendations for promoting real equality and opening up the full business benefits of LGBT+ inclusion:

1. Set the right tone from the top and engage with CEOs
2. Create clear pathways for career progression
3. Stand up and advocate for LGBT+ equality
4. Build and empower LGBT+ ally networks
5. Create inclusive communications

What comes through most strongly for me is how important it is for leaders to be active advocates for LGBT+ equality and inclusion. When the LGBT+ talent in our survey were asked about their priorities for creating an inclusive organization, more than 90% pointed to a leader who is prepared to be a visible and vocal LGBT+ ally. This includes both LGBT+ and non-LGBT+ executives. Leaders set the tone from the top and ensure that inclusion for all minority groups, including LGBT+ employees, is an organization-wide priority. They can also help give LGBT+ employees the confidence that they can be themselves and succeed within the organization.

Sometimes, however, speaking out and being an active ally creates challenges. There are many countries where homophobia and discriminatory laws are still prevalent. Even in relatively liberal societies I know of colleagues who’ve received online abuse for supporting developments such as equal marriage. In turn, some leaders may be nervous about saying anything about LGBT+ issues in case they say the wrong thing. Yet this can be the worst thing to do, as LGBT+ employees may assume that the silence signifies a lack of real support. Leaders can’t hide or ignore these issues – they should stand up and be counted.

My own experiences as an LGBT+ ally and support for groups such as our GLEE network have been both eye-opening and life-affirming. It’s fun to take part in network events and if people hear me speaking or see me at these events, they’ll know I’m on their side and that they can come to me if they need my support or have an issue at work.

So, everyone has a part to play in creating genuinely inclusive organizations. And leaders should be at the forefront as allies and role models. If you as a leader stand shoulder to shoulder with your LGBT+ employees, they can deliver their full potential in support of your organization.

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Be a Better Champion for Women, LGBT and People of Color (Even if You Are a Woman)

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By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

In Ireland, we have an expression that says, “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”.

Although this probably comes from some ancient religious threat, it reminds me of diversity and the work that needs to be done by all people.

Most people have good intentions but without action, the status quo prevails. It is not a well kept secret that historical behaviors, norms and laws have not exactly favored women, people of color or LGBT people, so inaction is a form of collusion.

The quote from Edmund Burke, “ The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing,” is a good one for equality. If we do nothing, while other people are endorsing racism, messaging misogyny as a norm and creating homophobic laws as is happening right now in the USA, it is going to be a race to the bottom.

Of course, if you feel that you are not a “bad person” as most of us do, that doesn’t let us off the hook with what we do and don’t do for equality in our circles. This work starts with real awareness of how there are many versions of life out there and that one’s subjective lens is just that. Subconsciously the brain assigns value to everything. A better than and worse than frame from tea and coffee to straight and gay “lifestyles” (Yachting is a lifestyle, not being LGBT.)

Social scientists and neuroscientists finally agree that unless you override your brain, biases will kick in based on what assumptions were built from messaging over time. Kegan and Lahey do a great job talking about this in their book ‘Immunity to Change’, pointing out that the socialized mind can only work with subjective truths while the goal of seeing through your lens while also examining your lens will free you. To see the glass as not half empty or half full will take you to a place of knowing it is just a glass while understanding others are limited to the binary is very valuable.

So, if you want to be a good ally or champion to others even if you are a woman, LGBT or a person of color, start with a hard look at your thoughts, your paradigms and how this comes out of your mouth as words. Your actions have a chance of changing if you know how they are formed because behaviors come from beliefs. Your audio and your visuals need to match or simply put, people won’t know whether you are proactive in making progress happen or if you are a fan of status quo, or worse and we all know what worse looks like as 2018 is the year of explicit examples.

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LGBTQ: Inclusion Means Being Visibly Valued, Not Just Accepted

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By Aimee Hansen

Last year, theglasshammer covered how corporations are taking the unexpected lead role in advocacy for LGBTQ rights, amidst the debasing of governmental protection and condoning of discrimination.

As companies continue to do so – for a multitude of reasons possibly as a direct response to the regressive approach that the Trump administration has taken. The Fenway Institute concludes that, “on balance the Trump Administration has pursued policies that will likely increase discrimination against LGBT people.” This includes repealing non-discrimination regulations that provided protections to LGBT people, encouraging religious refusal discrimination through executive branch actions and “vastly reshaping the federal judicial landscape in a way that is very concerning for LGBT people.” And, in the US, 28 states still lack basic protections in employment (and housing) when it comes sexual orientation and gender identity. Fear and phobia are arguably the central agency of political action and inaction on the LGBTQ front, nationally and internationally. But public opinion around the validity of equal rights for same-sex marriage has never been higher at around 62%.

So, with progressive corporations taking the lead, what does real LGBTQ inclusion look and feel like?

Increased Corporate Adoption of LGBTQ Friendly Policies

In HRC’s Corporate Equality Index 2018 annual assessment of employer’s LGBTQ workplace policies, a record-breaking 609 companies earned perfect scores, up by 18% from 517 last year. 83% of U.S.’s Fortune 500 companies offer clear protections on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity, an increase from 3% just 15 years ago in protection for gender identity. Over 90% of CEI-rated businesses include both sexual orientation and gender identity employment protections for their U.S. and international operations. The results demonstrate that “business has not waited for a legal mandate to become LGBTQ-inclusive,“according to Beck Bailey, deputy director of the HRC Foundation’s Workplace Equality Program, because it’s both the right thing to do and good business in creating diverse and attractive workplaces. ”They aren’t waiting for federal civil rights laws to change; they’re adopting their own inclusive policies and practices.”

“Good employers don’t simply cut paychecks every two weeks. They have to model good citizenship–not just in words but in actions–in the communities where their LGBTQ employees live and work,” wrote Ineke Mushovic, executive director of the Movement Advancement Project, in Fast Company.

Mushovic urges companies to do four things to advance LGBT rights: push for non-discrimination laws, declare that you’re open to all, fight discriminatory ‘bathroom bills’, and build a more diverse and inclusive workplace.

The Tangibility Gap Between Policies and Practice

OutNEXT/PwC surveyed 231 LGBT+ high performance employees, and 28 corporate leaders among mostly Out Leadership companies, for their report “Out to Succeed: Realising the full potential of LGBT+. The report sought to better understand how organizations can support high-performing LGBT+ employees. The majority of employees and employers agreed that having an openly supportive focus on LGBT inclusion has given the organizations wider access to the best talent and improved the organization’s place in the market. Additionally, 60% of employees believed that “being out at work has improved their ability to do business and engage with customers.” The report also noted some gaps between employers and employees, and gaps between the existence of policies in companies and whether LGBT+ employees experienced them as being present, visible and realized.

99% of employees indicated “reputation as a fair and equal employer (e.g., known for being LGBT+ friendly)” as important to making a company attractive as an employer. Only 57% of employers saw this as a key factor, a clear gap. Also according to the report, “Nearly 90% of employees believe that visible LGBT+ leaders within a company are important, though a high proportion of organizations don’t have senior LGBT+ leaders who are visible.” The report authors also shared that “while employees valued both inclusive action focused on recruitment and career progression, many were unaware even when companies claimed to have these programs.”

Only 35% of employees were aware that their companies had programs focused on recruiting LGBT+ employees, though 60% of businesses claimed to have them. And “while nearly 60% of employers take steps to create a pathway to senior management for LGBT+ people, only around 40% of employees believe this is the case.”

Further, about 40% believed that their organizations weren’t doing enough to encourage LGBT+ diversity. Over a third felt that despite the talk, opportunities weren’t really equal for all. The authors note, “It’s telling that nearly 40% of employers agree.”
OutNEXT/PwC found that over 80% of these “high-performing, high potential developing leaders” felt comfortable being out at work, yet more than half knew junior colleagues or even peers that were not out.

Stonewall found that in Britain, 35% of LGBT+ employees still hide their identity out of fear of discrimination. According to Psychology Today, “Two in five LGBT workers (40 percent) report feeling bullied at work.”

“For too many LGBT+ employees, many organisations still feel closeted. This hinders not only the organisations in recruiting and retention, but, more importantly, this hinders the careers of LGBT+ professionals,” says Bob Moritz, Global Chairman, PwC. “All of us need to create inclusive environments where LGBT+ talent can feel safe, free to be their true selves, and fully participate in the workplace.”

The Importance of Being Visible & Valued, Not Just Accepted

In its third year and with an active alumni network, Stanford’s LGBTQ Executive Leadership Program supports experienced applicants to catapult their careers into the C-Suite. The week-long program offers, among other benefits, to help participants learn the influences of their LGBTQ identity on their leadership style and how to become a more authentic leader (or be their ‘genuine self’).

“I’ve always been out at work, but I think Stanford helped me to embrace the idea of not just being out, but being visible,” said Beth Parker, public relations director at PwC in Washington, D.C. “It was transformative for me because it was sort of an awakening. I became keenly aware of the responsibility that I have to other people in the LGBTQ community,” said Parker. “It made me want to mentor people, it made me want to lead more in that space and be more visible.” Other alumni have also shared how the program encouraged them to stop trying to be heteronormative and to speak out visibly about issues of sexual identity in the workplace. Set against a political backdrop of dismissal of rights and encouragement of discrimination, the real bar of inclusion isn’t just acceptance. It’s cultivating a culture which allows LGBTQ individuals to show up as our whole selves at work, not feeling the need to pass or cover. It’s feeling invited, visible and valued, and to see it play out in our leaders and in our opportunities.

Companies can more demonstrably show LGBTQ employees what inclusion really looks and feels like. LGBTQ leaders and individuals can more visibly claim their inclusion.

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The Game Changing Power of Allies

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Image via Shutterstock

Guest contributed by Lisa Levey

In the challenging work of supporting diversity in the workplace – and diversity as it relates to social justice more broadly – allies play a critical role.

But before exploring why allies make such a difference, it makes sense to begin with the question: what exactly is an ally?

The definition that most accurately captures my vision of a diversity ally is a person who joins with another in a mutually beneficial relationship. While ally relationships can sometimes be framed as a more powerful individual helping a less powerful one, my belief is there is much to be gained on both sides.

Why Do Allies Matter?

Allies matter on both a micro level and a macro level. For an individual, an ally can literally change the direction of someone’s life and in so many cases does: that teacher who believes in a student who is struggling at home against huge odds or that manager who gives a young woman the confidence to imagine reaching her most aspirational goals.

On a macro level, allies change the game by collectively redefining what is normal and acceptable. The 1960’s Freedom Riders were an important piece of the puzzle leading to the passage of the Civil Rights Act and the engagement of those who are heteronormative has played an important role in expanding LGBT rights in recent decades.

Allies provide much needed help in shouldering the heavy load of driving societal change. They provide inspiration, energy, protection, resources and validation. They send the message that you are not alone.

What Does an Ally Look Like?

There is no one recipe for being – or becoming – an ally. Allies do a wide variety of things and come in many different packages. There are allies who are bold and confrontational and those who fly under the radar, quietly driving change.

Male allies described myriad ways in which men support gender equality, responding to problematic situations as they arise as well as working proactively to change norms. With the goal of stopping a male colleague from regularly interrupting women in meetings, a male ally could call out the situation in the moment or reach out to the individual in private at a later time.

Alternatively he could create meeting ground rules that normalize not interrupting others or make it a habit to pick up the thread of conversation and return the floor to the woman after an interruption.

What Do Allies Do?

While there is no one formula for being a diversity ally, there are clear behaviors and activities that are characteristic, as outlined below. You’ll also find examples with ideas for someone seeking to become a diversity ally.

1. Seek to understand the experiences of others:

Allies communicate interest in wanting to listen and learn, doing so in a way that’s respectful and honors the lived experience of others.

Examples: Read articles about families and consider the extent to which these articles reflect the experience of LGBT women and men. Ask women in your life how, if at all, gender has affected their work lives. Conversely, ask men how gender has, if at all, affected their role as a parent.

2. Observe with a fresh eye:

Allies seek to pay close attention, often beginning to develop a new lens and seeing things that previously were invisible. They see the power that systems and structures play in driving outcomes, previously seeing only individual choices and situations.

Examples: Watch who speaks and who listens in meetings at work. Think about the last five to ten people who have been promoted at work and see if there is a pattern.

3. Practice humility:

One of the biggest challenges in discussing inequity is the guilt people feel, or fight mightily to not feel, which puts them on the defense and unable to listen. Allies have a willingness to move out of their comfort zone and to manage their emotional responses so that they can listen to understand rather than to respond.

Examples: Consider what thinking about – racism, sexism, heterosexism – brings up for you and how you can put it in context. Participate in an activity where you are out of your comfort zone and reflect on how that makes you feel – powerful? effective? successful?

4. Are willing to reflect:

Allies observe their own thinking patterns and default assumptions. Becoming conscious of their own internal biases and tendencies enables them to interrupt automatic patterns, think more critically, and respond more effectively.

Examples: Take an Implicit Bias Test to explore your thinking biases. Realize bias is how everyone’s brain is wired and awareness is the first step to disrupting the pattern.

5. Engage as partners:

Allies get involved but are conscious to not take over. They engage in the spirit of walking beside those they are seeking to support and helping to amplify their efforts.

Examples: Attend an employee network meeting at your company to show your support and to learn. Participate in an activity for a group you want to support such as walking in a Pride Parade or attending a conference such as Fatherhood 2.0.

6. Avoid contributing to the problem:

With greater understanding of the challenges of diverse groups, allies become far more conscious of how their own behaviors may contribute to the problem, and act accordingly. If they are unclear about the impact of their behaviors, they ask for feedback.

Examples: Don’t get on the band wagon of stereotypes, woman always do this or men always do that.

7. Work to empower others:

One way allies do this is by responding as an advocate, in both subtle and more overt ways, particularly when others marginalize individuals [or groups.]

Examples: Don’t give oxygen or attention to the guy who consistently cracks sexual jokes. As a team leader, be proactive in ensuring women of color in the group [who face major challenges to advancement] get their fair share of stretch assignments.

8. Provide resources:

Allies might provide monetary resources to groups or causes they care about, but they also contribute their time and energy. They demonstrate support by sharing their social capital.

Examples: If someone’s viewpoint in a meeting is being silenced, interrupt and say, “I’d look to hear more about this issue.”

9. Support changes in policies, practices and legislation:

A powerful way to be an ally is to help change the structural norms that reinforce inequality.

Examples: Support equal rights for LGBT men and women. Look at suggested interventions focused on combating sexism, and suggest to your manager or leader an experiment to try one with your team.

10. Identify and act on where they can have impact:

No matter what one’s role, there are many ways to be an ally. The goal is to determine where you can use your influence to make a difference.

Examples: As a parent think about what messages you send through your words and actions about gender roles. As a manager, understand how much you impact the people that work for you. Step back and consider what would you change if your goal was to be an ally.

In a nutshell, allies educate themselves and work to proactively make a positive difference!

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Five Top Tips for Effective Working from Home

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accountability

Image via Shutterstock

Guest contributed by Anna Whitehouse

Finding it hard to focus?

Don’t despair, as it’s perfectly possible to make telecommuting or working from working a success if you follow these five handy tips.

1. Create a dedicated space

Separating work from family life is the key to effective home working. A desk in a spare room or study is ideal, as you’ll find it easier to switch off if you can close the door at the end of the day. Alternatively, if space is tight, try setting aside a corner of your bedroom or living room.

Having a dedicated work space also tells family members and friends that you are actually working and that they need to leave you in peace. Avoid working on the sofa or at the kitchen table at all costs, as you’ll be constantly interrupted.

2. Structure your day

It’s very easy to become distracted when you’re working from home, but sticking to a familiar structure will help you to focus. We suggest adhering to set hours, so that your clients know when to contact you and your family and friends know when you’re free to socialize.

Worried about a tight deadline? While it’s tempting to just keep on working until you’ve finished the task, doing this regularly will have an impact on your physical and mental health. Instead of risking burnout, we recommend punctuating your day with regular breaks, as these will keep you motivated and help you to produce better quality work.

If you find that you’ve finished a project and you’re waiting for feedback, resist the urge to turn on the TV and use the time to catch up with admin, update your portfolio or approach potential customers.

3. Banish distractions

Checking social media and emails every five minutes isn’t helpful when you’re working at home, so why not restrict yourself to checking them during your breaks? Seeing this as a reward can be motivating.

Turning off the radio and television could also help you to focus on your work, as a recent study found that clerical workers in a noisy room were less motivated to complete tasks and had elevated stress levels compared to those in a quiet room.

If you find that you’re too distracted by jobs that need doing at home, try spending the occasional morning working in a local coffee shop, library or co-working space. We guarantee that you’ll return to your desk feeling motivated and refreshed.

4. Eat well

While home working means that you don’t have to resist the constant round of staff room treats, you’ll still have easy access to another source of temptation; your fridge. To stay energized, stock up on healthy snacks like dried fruit, nuts, oat cakes and dark chocolate.

Whether you prefer sushi, salad or a sandwich, always make yourself a proper lunch, as this will help you to be more productive. Try to include some protein packed lean meat, eggs, beans or nuts and a serving of salad or veg. Oily fish is also a great choice, as supplementing your diet with omega-3 fish oil could boost your concentration. If you need some lunchtime inspiration, check out the delicious recipes available at The Freelancer’s Cookbook.

If you’re keen to stave off hunger and prevent an afternoon slump, make sure that you stay hydrated. This means limiting the amount of tea and coffee you drink and opting for plain water, water with a slice of lemon in it or water sweetened with a little sugar free squash.

5. Get out and about

Working from home can get lonely even if you’re an introvert, so it’s worth getting out of the house for a change of scenery now and again. Joining a monthly networking group, having lunch with a friend or meeting a client for coffee could all help to combat any feelings of isolation.

Getting out is also good for your physical health, as sitting for long periods of time slows down your body’s ability to regulate blood sugar and blood pressure. However, recent research states that it’s possible to reduce the effect of sitting still if you exercise. So how about going for a brisk lunchtime walk or trying out an online yoga session?

Take our tips on board and we guarantee that working from home will become an enjoyable and productive experience. You’ll achieve more, feel healthier and be able to relax properly at the end of the working day.

What are your top tips for home working? We’d love to know!

Anna Whitehouse writes for Inspiring Interns, which specialises in finding candidates their perfect internship. To browse our graduate jobs, visit our website.

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Reluctant Leaders – Why You Might Be Readier to Lead than You Think

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Latina

Guest contributed by Sarah Dixon

Ann thought that she knew herself well.

At 45-year-old, she’d been tested by life often enough to know her strengths and weaknesses. She’d done a few personality tests over the years and had a handle on how she worked most effectively at work.

Then Ann’s firm called in team-building experts, who carried out personality evaluations on the whole team. As Ann read her report, she saw something that she’d never considered before. She had tested well for leadership ability.
Ann had never thought of pursuing more responsibility in her career. Work, for her, had always taken a second place to looking after the children. But with the kids at university, Ann began to think about the possibility. Once she turned thought into action, it wasn’t long before she started rising through her organisation.

This shouldn’t be surprising to anyone, let alone to Ann. Many of the qualities that make a good leader are gained through the sort of life experiences that women deal with day in, day out. There are examples of these kinds of experiences throughout this article, but these are not the only way those qualities can be acquired. Hopefully they will enable you to identify a similar experience in your life, if you have not had that particular one yourself.

Empathy

There have been many studies over the years which have shown that women are more empathic than men. While this empathy is sometimes perceived as a weakness, when you’re building a team being able to understand your staff and find ways to motivate them has obvious advantages. Rather than adopting a dictatorial style, it allows you to build a deeper connection with staff which pays dividends in terms of loyalty and commitment.

Empowerment

Girls compete, women empower – or so the meme goes. But this isn’t just about feminism and giving your fellow females a leg-up. Managers who delegate tasks within their team, and give their staff the tools they need to excel are more successful than their more controlling counterparts. As women, we spend a lot of our time facilitating for others. Whether it’s our partners, children, or friends we are used to supporting others to achieve for themselves. Carrying this instinct into a leadership role brings you a loyal, talented and effective team.

Resilience

Whether it’s banging your head on the glass ceiling, or dealing with the sorts of experiences highlighted by the #metoo campaign, women have a head start in continuing in the face of adversity. Resilience doesn’t mean bullishly pushing on regardless of what comes your way. Cassandra Stavrou of Propercorn wrote in The Telegraph explained how for her, resilience was about thinking strategically rather than simply being strong. It led her to develop recognisable packaging to ensure that her boxes were not lost in vast warehouses.

Communication

Because women take on the burden of emotional labor, we also become adept as communicators. Being well organized, and finding the right words to get things done are skills that we often overlook, simply because they are taken for granted by society as a whole. But if you’ve ever had to talk down a toddler who has been given triangles of toast when they wanted squares, you’ve been prepared for negotiation. Handling relationship breakdowns gives us experience in making deals, even when the stakes are high. Life teaches us the importance of saying what we need to say.

Accountability

Ultimately, a good manager needs to be able to hold their hand up and take responsibility if things don’t go to plan. If someone on your team screws up? The buck stops with you. But, doesn’t it always? Whether it’s birth control, avoiding sexual assault or many other issues women are constantly being asked to stay accountable for the actions of others. While those expectations are often unfair, perhaps the silver lining is that they prepare us to be willing to shoulder the burdens of our team.

No Better Time

There is perhaps no better time than the present to look for more responsibility. The world is changing. Women’s voices are finally being heard and men are beginning to really see the equality problem. We can hope that the coming generations will find their lives so much easier, their paths to leadership more assured.

But for those of us who find ourselves standing on the threshold of management via a more circuitous route, we can take comfort in the fact that while the journey may not have been easy, it has at least prepared us for what is to come.

Sarah Dixon writes for Inspiring Interns, which specializes in sourcing candidates for internships and graduate jobs.

Disclaimer: The opinions and views of Guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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Time to look for a new job

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By Nicki Gilmour, Executive Coach and Organizational Psychologist

So you figured out that you need a new job!

There are many ways to start a job search yet sometimes it can seem so daunting to start the process.

There are general strategies to job hunting, such as if you know vaguely the target companies that you would like to interview with then start investigating the opportunities there. LinkedIn is a great way to see if you know anyone directly or indirectly at your preferred firms and a good place to start is to mine your current network to build your future one. Apply to job postings but know that any personal connection will probably help you so it is worth checking your network and refreshing your relationships with coffees and lunch with influencers and mentors.

What people don’t tell you is that what you will want to do in the hunt matters. What you tell yourself and your own perceptions of yourself will also matter as does your confidence and level of extroversion.

If you don’t know what is next, it is worth working with a coach ( such as myself and the vetted coaches who partner with theglasshammer) to help you refine what is the next stage of your career and help you secure the job you want, whether it is within your current industry or perhaps a pivot into something new altogether?

Contact nicki@theglasshammer.com is you would like to hire an executive coach to help you navigate the path to optimal personal success at work.

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Forget Work-Life Balance – Try Work-Life Harmony Instead

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Guest contributed by Rae Steinbach

More than ever, the importance of finding and maintaining a healthy work-life balance is being talked about.

However, at times the somewhat elusive goal of perfect equilibrium between our work and personal lives can seem to be unobtainable, especially in a world where we are constantly connected and always available via various forms of technology.

This availability and connection can obscure the line between work and play. Are you working when you check your emails over a morning coffee before making your way to the office? Is attending to personal needs during work hours your prerogative?

These days, delineating where work ends and your personal life begins is even more difficult. However, you can also leverage the transforming expectations and more easily integrate work with life, and vice-versa. Instead of being concerned with how taking a midday break to go to a workout class will affect your performance appraisal, be more comfortable in embracing how this is important in maintaining work-life harmony and stay later at work that day if necessary.

Explore What Harmony Looks Like

According to some experts, achieving a balance between work and the rest of your life has little to do with an equal distribution of your time. Rather, it is about prioritizing achievement and enjoyment each day. Instead of treating your job as a strictly metered necessity to pay for the other elements of your existence, try aiming for harmony. This means working more when needed to achieve business goals, and switching focus and energy to yourself and family when necessary.

Many of us are already taking this tactic to reduce stress and get more out of each day. A recent survey by Randstad found that around half of us deal with personal matters during work hours and work responsibilities in our personal time. Furthermore, more businesses are happy for their workers to do this, as long as the work gets done.

By allowing for the fluidity of life, we are able to find a more harmonious flow to our day that is also a benefit to the company. For example, prioritizing a morning exercise class can keep our minds sharper in the office, and attending to emails in the evening once our house is quiet ensures we are ready for the next day’s priorities.

The Ideal Life

Thanks to social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram, it’s easy to think that almost everyone you know is living the dream. The truth is, most of us present our best side to the world and the less attractive parts of our existence are glossed over or completely left out.

While many of us curate the content we expose about our lives, research has found that more than 75% of people on social media lie about their lives. It is helpful to keep in mind that the carefully curated images and updates from others’ lives leads to negative self-comparison, and the extent of social media interaction can undermine our meaningful, real-life experiences.

To avoid the negative impact of aiming for perfect balance in our lives and competing with misleading social media updates, it is important to focus on the important things: creating harmony between our work and personal lives, making time for fun, achieving our goals, and acknowledging that the rhythm of our lives has little to do with the lives you are viewing through the filtered lens of social media.

Don’t get hung-up on a perfect work-life balance. Instead, dance to your own tune of work-life harmony. Integrating the two creates a healthier coexistence that will let you thrive more easily in both aspects of your life.

Disclaimer: The opinions and views of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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Tips on successful career networking

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Professional-networking-advice featured

Guest contributed by Avery Philips

Before you step foot in any networking event, it’s best to have some questions prepared to avoid those awkward moments of silence.

Ask these questions the next time you’re at a networking event to secure connections:

  • How did you hear about this event?
  • What’s your favorite thing about your job?
  • Have you always wanted to work in this field?
  • How can I help you?

These kinds of questions show your interest in the other person and allow for longer conversations. You can also learn something new and discover the kind of connections they have with other people. Finally, by offering your services to prospective business connections, they may offer their services in return.

Utilize Alumni Networks

As it turns out, a college education can provide a lot more than a degree and student debt. Alumni associations like Arizona State’s offer a wide variety of networking resources to help you advance in your career. Here’s are some best practices for alumni networking you can do:

  • Attend events that are open to alumni. Use these get-togethers to form in-person connections that can result in lasting relationships.
  • Volunteer at your alumni association. Getting involved shows your overall interest and your willingness to put in the effort to take advantage of these resources. It will also get you into contact with like-minded individuals who will remember you when opportunities arise.
  • When you get in touch, stay in touch. Plan coffee and lunch meetups to keep you fresh in business professionals’ minds. Don’t forget to email them as well and see what’s new with them.
Explore Other Networking Groups

Although the college you graduated from offers a wealth of networking resources, there are plenty of other networking outlets at your disposal. That way, networking can work for you instead of the other way around. Here are a few you should look into:

  • General Networking: There are many conferences all over that allow a variety of people to come together and network. Even if someone isn’t in your field, you can find different opportunities and new paths to take by networking with different kinds of people.
  • Seminars: Accomplish two things by signing up for a seminar. Not only will you get to learn new things, you’ll also be able to network with speakers and attendees. You never networkingknow who will come to these events, so it’s best to be observant and to talk to as many people as you can.
  • Social Media: Almost everyone is on social media, and they’re only one direct message away. Look for business professionals you think would be instrumental in your career and comment on their posts. Ask them questions about themselves and how they became successful. More likely than not, they’ll be more than happy to tell you.

Networking is a must if you want to be successful in your career. Who you know can be just as important as how well you do your job. By following these tips, your networking skills will be as stellar as your job performance, opening the doors to many job opportunities for you.

Disclaimer: The opinions and views of guest contributors are not necessarily those of theglasshammer.com

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Hidden Truths about Making Gender Equality Possible for Ambitious, Dual Career Couples

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Guest contributed by Lisa Levey

Most millennials, particularly those that are highly educated, see an egalitarian marriage as the ideal.

Yet despite improvements, a clear divide persists in how women and men perceive – and experience – gender equality.

Men are far more optimistic about progress for women in the workplace and both genders don’t see eye-to-eye regarding what the other contributes to the care of the home and family. A 2017 study across eight countries found men were more likely to perceive housework and childcare as equally shared and both genders saw themselves, not their partners, as the ones scaling back on their careers after becoming a parent.

This blog shares hidden truths, based on extensive research and personal experience, about what does help to make gender equality not just an aspiration, but a reality, or far more of one.

Understanding the cycle of inequality:

It’s difficult for couples to appreciate, before children, the powerful forces that drive ambitious women and men, professional equals, to devolve into gendered norms after becoming parents. The story often goes something like this:

A child joins the family. Dad takes little time away from work, feeling the intensity of professional demands and the fear that prioritizing family will jeopardize future career prospects. While on parental leave, mom becomes the undisputed parent expert, owing to her daily immersion caring for their child. When mom returns to work, she becomes the flexible parent, typically by default. If like most new fathers, dad works more hours than before children, feeling the familiar professional pressures heightened by a powerful awareness of his provider role, one society continues to place disproportionately on his shoulders.

Dad continues his career climb, feeling an increased drive to maximize his income and professional potential. Meanwhile mom struggles mightily to combine her former professional life with motherhood. At work her inability to be all in, given her role as the primary parent, leads to misguided beliefs about her professional commitment and leadership potential. She feels disoriented and angry. She wonders why her life as a mother bears little resemblance to before, while her husband’s, pre versus post-child, seems little changed.

Understanding how parenthood comes to be the death knell of gender equality for so many couples with egalitarian intentions, puts couples in the driver’s seat, enabling them to navigate the challenges and make choices that keep them firmly on the gender equality path.

Cultivating a partnership mentality:

As couples feel the egalitarian ideal they highly value slipping away, it becomes natural to channel their anger and frustration at one another. A far better solution is for them to instead spend their precious energy to collectively identify, and employ, the levers of change they can influence such as simultaneously adapting work schedules to enable greater sharing at home and considering the tradeoffs involved with buying a bigger house.

Egalitarian couples come to see their partner on the same team rather than as the problem. Anchored by a shared perspective, possibilities open up as couples work together to navigate the real problems – the rampant attitudes, policies, and practices – that keep women and men from what they deeply desire: to be both successful, committed professionals and involved parents.

Planning ahead:

So often couples talk in broad strokes, with few specifics about having children, often underestimating the impact on many aspects of life – work, marriage, finances, and time. What helps is getting clarity on what’s most important for each person individually, and collectively as a couple, in this next phase of life.

Beginning with the question – What will it look like to nurture two professional careers once we become parents? – helps couples to create a joint work-life vision for their growing family. Discussing questions like those below enables couples to start imagining and planning how the first phase, of parenting pre-school children, could work.

  • How much child care feels comfortable?
  • How will we manage child care when the normal routine breaks down?
  • What will stay the same – and what will need to change – in how we manage our professional lives?
  • How will we ensure that the work-life model we’ve put into place is working?

These discussions help create a compass that guides decision making as couples confront the inevitable complexities, choices and tradeoffs required of dual-career parents. The goal is not to have all the answers but rather to begin a conversation, one that will stretch over decades, about how to put the puzzle pieces of their lives together in ways that seek to preserve the gender equality they value.

Prioritizing the couple relationship:

Becoming parents often leads to putting the couple relationship at the very bottom of the priority list. But women and men who seek a long-term, egalitarian relationship do so at their peril. The ongoing investment of time and attention is foundational in cementing the egalitarian mold for combining careers and caretaking.

What this means is the couple relationship needs to be on par with – if not more important than – either children or work. Egalitarian couples walk in each other’s shoes, intimately understanding all it takes to make the engine of work and family run. This sharing facilitates the depth of connection that helps relationships endure long beyond the child rearing years.

Supporting atypical gender norms:

Armed with the understanding that powerful norms reinforce traditional gender roles, egalitarian parents work pro-actively to counter them. That could mean: saving money well before a child is born or adopted, allowing dad to also take an extended parental leave or dad clarifying new boundaries at work, enabling him to more equally share the demands of being a caregiver,enabling his partner to keep investing in her career.

Supporting atypical norms could mean mom fighting her tendency to over manage at home, instead treating her husband as a true co-parent, or bringing down the pressure by relaxing her cleanliness standards, instead prioritizing time for connection and fun.

Realizing the power of modeling for your kids:

Confronting the challenges to gender equality in a world of gender inequality is easier when it becomes a parenting goal. In interviewing couples seeking to walk the egalitarian path, I heard them repeatedly describe how meaningful it felt to show their children that women and men can be amazing caretakers and ambitious professionals. Stopping to consider what messages their behaviors send to their children helps mothers and fathers to step back and readjust when inevitably, they veer off course from their egalitarian ideal.

Living within your means:

Money plays an outsized role in a couple’s ability to create an egalitarian partnership and it’s not just about the pay equity gap. Rather couples at their financial edge feel the need to maximize income, often leading to privileging the more lucrative job and through time widening the gap in importance and earnings between their two careers.

The problem with the more lucrative earner being seen as having the primary career is that it greatly reduces his, or her, ability to make choices, such as putting limits on excessive work demands or leaving a job that’s unhealthy or a poor fit. Creating an economic buffer allows couples to pivot as needed, all the while continuing to value both careers.

Though dual career couples are ubiquitous, egalitarian couples are not. The difference is both nuanced and profound. For couples who want equality to characterize their lives together as parents, it requires awareness and skill to write their own work-life script, because even in 2018 the egalitarian model of careers and kids remains the road far less travelled.

About the author

Lisa Levey is a veteran diversity consultant, working with leading organizations to assist them in realizing the underutilized leadership potential of women. Her current work focuses on engaging men as allies and partners. As a consultant, she led the design and development of the Forte Foundation’s Male Ally signature resource platform. She blogs for the Glass Hammer, the Huffington Post and the Good Men Project on gender issues.

Her award-winning book The Libra Solution spotlights the obstacles and enablers to gender equality for dual-career professionals raising children. Lisa and her husband Bryan, a technology executive, have been featured in Fast Company magazine and on ABC News with Charlie Gibson in stories about their egalitarian work-life approach. Their coaching practice Genderworks supports dual-career professional couples in laying a foundation for, and navigating the obstacles to, gender equality as parents. Lisa earned an MBA with highest honors from the Simmons School of Management and a BS with distinction from Cornell University in applied economics

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