Tag Archive for: work life

Are Moms the Original Project Managers?

,

As both a mom and a project management trainer, I can’t help but notice the amazing parallels between the two universes. Since I was a project manager long before becoming a mom, I assumed that my project management skills were just amazingly convenient as I juggled the complex labyrinth of motherhood. But as I mingled with other moms years later, I started to notice that the best moms seem to have almost innate project management skills that help them not just survive but thrive when faced with the day to day challenges and complexities of managing life’s most important project – raising our kids!

What Smart Moms Could Teach the Even Best Project Managers

Always Have a Backup Plan

Image via Shutterstock

Image via Shutterstock

The best moms know that if it can go wrong, it probably will. Of course, it’s better to hope for the best but plan for the worst and that includes having a solid backup plan – whether it’s an extra sippy cup, a change of clothes, an alternate lunch option, or a favorite toy just in case little Johnny misses his nap and loses his “pleasant personality”. Likewise, project managers can’t just rely on their project plan/schedule as written no matter how much time was spent generating it – they must plan for technology failure, losing a key team member, product delivery delays, etc. from Day 1.

Avoid Theoretical Time Estimate/Pad the Schedule

Every experienced mom know that a trip anywhere (to church, school, play dates, etc.) almost always takes longer than you’d think on paper. Yes, GPS may say that grandma’s house is only a 20 minute drive, but that estimate doesn’t account for the almost predictable traffic jam, the last minute potty trip/diaper change that definitely can’t be rushed, and of course the extra 5 minutes it takes to load everything into the car (race back for whatever you forgot), buckle car seats, settle any arguments, etc. So often project managers fall into the tempting trap of calculating “theoretical task estimates” that also don’t take into account some of the not so unpredictable delays and snags that we should proactively consider when building the timeline.

Temperature Check Regularly

As a busy mom, it’s so tempting to get caught up in the practical day to day minutia and really miss the important connections with our kids. I’ve noticed that moms seem to naturally “check in” with their kids periodically to find out what’s bothering them, what’s their favorite game/song, who’s their new best friend at school, etc. Similarly project managers can get overwhelmed by day to day administrivia and should remember the importance of checking in with the team to assess morale and see what’s working and what’s not. Whether it’s periodic informal lunches or round robin meeting debriefs, you can’t put the team on autopilot – checking in proactively is key!

Build Broad Networks and Firm Up Relationships Before You Need Them

Moms know that “it takes a village” – no one can do it all on their own. So, they actively reach out to establish their village early whether that includes extended family/friends, play groups, before/after care programs, etc. Moms also know the importance of nurturing those relationships constantly so that when she has the last minute babysitting emergency, her favorite nanny is more likely to come over asap – no questions asked J. Similarly, project managers are ultimately responsible for delivering project results on time on budget but are often completely reliant on others (including distant stakeholders at times) to get the job done! They absolutely need to build a strong extended team to help support the project – particularly during times of crisis. But the key is don’t wait until there’s a crisis to try to build the relationship J

Dana Brownlee is an acclaimed keynote speaker, corporate trainer, and team development consultant. She is President of Professionalism Matters, Inc. a boutique professional development corporate training firm based in Atlanta, GA. She can be reached at danapbrownlee@professionalismmatters.com. Connect with her on Linked In and Twitter.

/by

Why Being a Working Mom is Good for Your Children, Not to Mention Gender Equality

,

Working motherAt work, or on your way? You may be helping your daughter’s professional future (and we’re not just talking college fund) or improving gender equality in your son’s future household.

As part of their new Gender Initiative, which seeks to “change the conversation around gender and work”, Harvard Business School released a study of over 30,000 adults across 24 countries which explored how having a working mother as a child affects educational, economic, and social outcomes as an adult. A working mother was defined as a mom that ever worked (part-time, full-time, etc) outside of the house before her child (the survey participant) was 14 years old.

Across the 24 countries, daughters of working mothers grew up to be more likely to have completed more years of education, to be employed, to be in supervisory roles, and earn higher incomes than daughters of non-working mothers. Sons of working mothers grew up to spend more time on household chores and taking care of family members than sons of non-working mothers.

Particularly, daughters of working moms in the USA have half a year more education, are 36% more likely to have a supervisory role (33.4% v 24.6%), and earn 23% more ($35.5K vs $28.9K average) than daughters of non-working moms. Sons of working moms spent 7 more hours caring for family members and 15 minutes more housework compared to sons of non-working moms.

According to lead researcher Dr. Kathleen McGinn, “This is as close to a silver bullet as you can find in terms of helping reduce gender inequalities, both in the workplace and at home.”

The Impact of Alternative Parental Role Models

Exposure to role models is critical for women in the workplace, in order to be able to envision yourself in a role which otherwise might not seem accessible. The working mom effect also comes down to alternative role modeling, the opening of possibilities around roles and responsibilities.

The researchers were not concerned about the nature or intensity of a working mom’s work, whether it was full-time or part-time, but rather simply how it played out when children were exposed to “a role model who showed you that women work both inside and outside the home.”

According to McGinn, “What it’s about is modeling alternatives for your children, letting them see that there are multiple roles that women can play and multiple roles that men can play in their lives at work and lives at home.” As the study showed, experiencing alternative role models that “aren’t constrained by really tight gender stereotypes” had different impacts for daughters and sons.

“What daughters of working moms see is that it’s okay to go to work, it’s completely normal, that’s something that women do,” said McGinn. “Sons see something really different and that is everybody has to pitch in here. There’s no good way to maintain a management of a life outside of the home and a life at home unless everybody at home is working together.” Previous research has shown that sons of working moms are also more likely to be married to working women.

McGinn told the Washington Post, “…working moms are affecting their children’s gender attitudes. They’re affecting the way they think about what’s appropriate behavior. And those gender attitudes in turn are affecting outcomes.”

Underlining the point, she says, “There are very few things, that we know of, that have such a clear effect on gender inequality as being raised by a working mother.”

No One Path For Parenting

According to McGinn, “There’s very, very little research suggesting that being raised by a working mom is bad for kids. I think that’s something we harbor.” It appears we do, and it’s exactly these notions that the research hopes to dispel.

A previous Pew survey found that while 34% of working moms felt increasing numbers of working moms were good for society, an equal 34% felt it was bad, and a further 31% felt neutral about it.When you look at the total population, negativity towards working moms gets stronger (41%), showing the influence of a strong societal belief. But when asking all adults this question, respondents with a working mom were less negative than those without.

Mothers who work full-time are also likely to be hardest on themselves when rating their own parenting, only 28% rating themselves as a 9/10 (about same as dads at 26%) versus 41% of part-time workings moms and 43% of non-working moms.

As Gender Initiative director Robin Ely points out, “So much of what people think they know about gender is simply not substantiated by empirical evidence but instead is informed by gender stereotypes.” The objective of the initiative is to break the conversation from the stereotypes.

In the HBS study, working mothers actually spent equal time caring for their children.A meta-analysis has shown that children of working mothers have less depression and anxiety and recent research found that quantity of time with children between ages 3 and 11 matters less than the quality of your presence when you’re with your children.

McGinn is quick to point out that this doesn’t mean moms should work, just that there are benefits to alternative role modeling which go against societal preconceptions.

“There’s a lot of parental guilt about having both parents working outside the home,” McGinn says. “But what this research says to us is that not only are you helping your family economically—and helping yourself professionally and emotionally if you have a job you love—but you’re also helping your kids. So I think for both mothers and for fathers, working both inside and outside the home gives your kids a signal that contributions at home and at work are equally valuable, for both men and women. In short, it’s good for your kids.”

Ultimately, it’s up to every family and every woman to make their own decisions about what is right for them and not based on societal ideas of what’s right for all families, all women, or all children.

No such “right” exists.

By Aimee Hansen

/by

Coping with hidden disabilities and conditions on the job: an invisible struggle

stressed_business-womanIn the United States, about 10% of Americans have an invisible disability – a medical condition with physical symptoms that might not be apparent to a casual observer. In fact, as many as 96% of people with chronic medical conditions do not outwardly appear to be disabled. While those with some invisible conditions may be protected from discrimination at work by the Americans with Disabilities Act, whether or not they actually receive that protection sometimes turns, unfairly, on others’ perceptions of the presence of impairment.

Read more

/by

Office Romance: A No, No For Your Career?

,
office loveHalf of us have done it, according to the latest Office Romance Survey by Vault, and if we have, we’re likely to be up for it again (64% would).
 
We’re also much less likely to hide it than ever before. Sound like a yes, yes to office romance?
 
Office love affairs are no fringe incident, though relatively less common in biotech, accounting and law, according to Vault. If roses by the dozen start popping up on desks from admirers this week, there’s no telling if they’re coming from across town or around the corner. The 24/7 work culture means there’s a lot of opportunity for relationships to build and sparks to ignite.
 
Any dalliance in love brings both reward and risk. But when it comes to pursuing a love connection at work, you may want to take a moment to mind the career risk.
 
Who and Just What Kind of Affairs?
 
The longer you’ve been in the workplace, the more likely you’ve been romantically involved with a co-worker, and likely more than once. While only 44% of Millennials have been involved (18-34) in office romances according to the Vault survey, this increases to 59% for Gen X (35-49) and 66% for Baby Boomers (50+).
 
However, experience may lessen the desire. Baby Boomers are also most likely to have avoided an office relationship (43%) compared to their younger counterparts (34% of Millennials). Among those who have been involved in office romances, Baby Boomers are least likely to want to do it again (54% vs. 67-68% for Millennials and GenX).
 
Office romances range from casual ongoing relationships (42% have had one), random hook-ups (36% have had one), serious long-term relationships (29% have had one), and even finding a spouse or partner (16%).
 
Beyond romantic connections between single employees, 46% of respondents said they’d known a married co-worker to have an office affair. 24% of those involved in an affair found it ended another long-term relationship in their life.
 
Men, Women, and Hierarchy
 
Women are more likely to report having been involved in an office affair then men (52% vs. 50%) and it’s more likely to have become a long-term serious relationship (17% vs. 13%). Women are less likely to have a random hook-up than men (15% vs. 22%), though the classification of romance is a very subjective thing.
 
But here’s the real deal – “hierarchical romances”which involve power differences are more frequent than “lateral ones.”Women are much more likely to date a supervisor than men (20% vs 13%). Men are much more likely to date a subordinate than women (32% vs. 12%). Previous research has even indicated that 10% of mentor-protégé relationships become sexually intimate, which reflects a clear power imbalance.
 
Office romance too often mirrors the uneven power dynamics between genders and women may pay a price, especially when it comes to how others perceive the affair.
 
Office Love Is Always a Triangle
 
You. Him or her. The rest of the office.
 
The inevitable thing about office romances is that it’s hard to keep the feelings between two people. Research shows that office relationships often foster negative feelings among co-workers, and these feelings tend to be targeted disproportionately at women.
 
While, only 6% of us find it totally unacceptable to get into office romance, we are more resistant to certain relationships. 33% feel office romances between co-workers of different levels are unacceptable. 30% disapproved if the co-workers are assigned to the same projects, and 27% if the lovers are in the same department.
 
Vault found 26% of people reported feeling uncomfortable because of co-workers’office romance. 32% felt a co-worker “gained a professional advantage”because of their office relationship.
 
One survey participant noted, “People just take more interest when they feel like their love interest is getting slighted, and it is hard not to feel like that is favoritism, even if they are the supervisor and have to get involved anyway.”
 
Studies have shown that hierarchical office relationships can result in hostility, where gender bias rears its ugly head. Women are more likely to be judged negatively for office affairs by other co-workers and female subordinates are more likely to be suspected of career-climbing motives, rather than love or ego motives, which ruffles more organizational feathers.
 
Previous research has found that subordinates in hierarchical office affairs are more likely to lose their job or be relocated, especially if female, and co-workers are also more likely to feel they should.
 
Play Smart at Work Love
 
The best strict career advice might be “just don’t do it”, but at a human level, nobody is immune to a rewarding and fulfilling relationship finding them at work.
 
Most importantly, Business Insider advises to steer clear of any relationships that are with your direct supervisor or subordinate, as this raises substantial career complications.
 
Know the company’s policies, if any. A bit of distance at work (another team, another department, another floor) may make for a better love match. Also, play out the scenario and consider the implications and ripple effects, whether love were to go sweet or sour or your roles changed.
 
Bottom line – if you’re going to play at love at work, then play it smart.
/by

Having a baby? Why choosing the right employer will make your life better

,

returnersOff the back of Facebook and Google’s announcement that employees will get financial assistance if they want to freeze their eggs, we look at what happens if you decide to take the plunge and have a child now. As any woman in the workforce or with a family can attest, there is no such thing as perfect timing when planning a baby but if you are thinking of doing it you need to choose your employer wisely. All employers are not created equal with leave and benefits especially in the U.S. where is the only one offering no paid compensation for maternity leave out of 21 high-income countries.

Read more

/by