Spell “words” backwards, and it becomes “sword.” When it comes to language in management meetings, it turns out that women wield a double-edged sword, a way of either weakening or strengthening their leadership position through the way they wield their words.
Research has found that as they speak, women tend to be more likely to be simultaneously aware of the concerns and agendas of others, and to adjust their language to reflect this. Professor Judith Baxter, Professor of Applied Linguistics at Aston University, UK calls this “double-voicing.”
Simply put, the ability to strategically incorporate what you anticipate others are thinking or feeling as you speak can be a career-boosting skill in your back pocket, if wielded selectively and well.
Anytime you are not only speaking your thoughts or views but are at the same time reflecting and incorporating what you believe others may think or feel into what you say, you’re double-voicing. You’re voicing for yourself and for those you’re speaking to or with.
It’s a “double-edged sword” which you might be using to undercut your leadership presence. But used strategically, it’s a masterful skill you can harness as a powerful leadership asset.
Women and Double-Voicing
In studying top-level conversations across seven major companies in the UK, Baxter found one fundamental distinction between male and female leadership language: “Women were four times more likely than men to be self-critical, qualify their comments, speak indirectly or apologetically when broaching difficult subjects with board members or when managing conflict.”
Baxter argues in a Babel article that as women climb the corporate ladder, in order to gain acceptance and approval they practice “serious linguistic work such as the carefully judged use of apology, humour, self-mockery, understatement, implied meaning and deference in order to minimise direct confrontation or criticism from male colleagues.”
How Double-Voicing Can Dilute Your Leadership
We already know that women’s words often are not treated the same as men’s in the office. When women are more assertive with their words, they can be judged more harshly than men are, for going against gender norms. So there’s strong reasons why women adapt how they speak.
But it’s harmful when women habitually use their tongue to weaken their own leadership stance. According to Baxter, double-voicing can be used to deliver “self-inflicted wounds.” For example, when double-voicing is used to pre-empt how others might perceive you as the speaker, you simply deflate your own authority and words.
This might sound like, “I realize I’m not the expert, but…” or “Sorry if I’m speaking out of turn, but…” or “I don’t mean to be difficult, but…” In her observations of top meetings, Baxter heard one woman caveat that she was “talking too much,” having taking only spoken twice, and watched the men nodding in agreement.
As Baxter told Virgin, women use double-voicing “to pre-empt criticism from colleagues and not to appear demanding or boastful. Double-voicing makes women seem less threatening to colleagues, both male and female.”
But trying to disarm the perceived critical viewpoint of others, when it comes to your authority or expertise as a speaker, has the reverse impact. When a woman hedges the very act of speaking, she is stealing the power of her words before she even gets them out. Baxter consistently found this kind of double-voicing was viewed negatively by all colleagues, damaging to the leadership positioning and authority of women.
Double-voicing can also take more seemingly benign forms that still undermine speech. “I probably haven’t understood you correctly, but…” or “I have probably got my wires crossed but should we consider…” or “You have probably thought about this point already, but…” This puts the speaker on the back foot.
How Double-Voicing Can Strengthen Your Leadership
In her book, “Double-voicing at Work: Power, Gender and Linguistic Expertise,” Baxter asserts that double-voicing is a form of “linguistic expertise.” The challenge is to use it deliberately.
Baxter writes in a Babel, “I suggest that double-voicing need not be a sign of weakness, but could actually be a source of strength.” She notes, “Double-voicing could be a highly sophisticated strategy to consolidate team relationships while achieving a female leader’s own agenda.”
According to Baxter, double-voicing can be used to “draw out a colleague who is silent, or to silence another who is outspoken, and to anticipate an emerging conflict and to soothe it into resolution.” Above all, it can help you communicate more effectively and inclusively as a leader.
If effective leadership means moving towards social awareness (not just self), being inquisitive (not directive), building power with (not over) colleagues, as well as showing an outward focus in your language, then double-voicing is a very powerful leadership skill when applied well.
For example, when applied not to second-guess your contribution as a speaker, but demonstrate insight and forethought about how others may feel about the content you are sharing, double-voicing can be “a highly constructive tool for leadership.”
It’s a skill to be able to anticipate the likely thoughts of the audience and incorporate those thoughts into your message to bring others onside as you are speaking. It’s a skill to reflect awareness of cultural or situational expectations. It’s a skill to pre-empt or diffuse criticism or agendas that could dilute the impact of the core point you are getting across. It’s a skill to reflect the perceived audience perspective in a way that builds greater solidarity with you as the speaker.
This could sound like, “The first question you may raise is…”, “Right now, you are probably wondering about x, and I’ve thought about that..”, or “At this point, we may all be asking ourselves…”
Double-voicing used intentionally, powerfully and iteratively reflects a “sophisticated linguistic expertise.”
Women’s voices are too seldom heard in the top executive offices and boardrooms for lack of representation. A woman’s double-voicing may reflect an internalization of the dialling down of women’s voices, a trace of acknowledgement that her voice is new here and has not always been validated.
But it’s time to self-validate. Flip double-voicing around as a leadership asset, and it’s one way to dial female leadership right up.
By Aimee Hansen