Someone once asked me if I felt I had to work harder than my male peers in order to succeed. While I won’t argue that a lot of hard work went into getting to where I am now, I attribute my success to a more strategic reason – working smarter.

Although Satya Nadella, Microsoft’s CEO, is credited with the “keep your nose to the grindstone and good things will come your way” school of thought, this skewed belief is a lot more prevalent than we would like to believe. Perhaps the most important outcome to these foot-in-mouth moments, besides sending the culprit on a heartfelt public mea culpa, is to start a conversation on the issues women still face in the workforce. Let’s face it, gender inequity is alive and well in America.

But this is a complicated issue borne from deeply ingrained biases on both sides of the table. Biases for which we are often unaware. Accepting this as a fact of life provides leverage to females who seek to move up the corporate ladder. Knowing what we are up against provides us the ability to strategize a plan. By the way, women are not immune to biases and accepting this as another fact of life provides the opportunity for us to overcome the filters within us.

For years, my career was on the fast-track. I had consistently proven my technical abilities and was convinced that my hard work would suffice in getting me noticed as I approached upper management levels. My naiveté anchored me and it was not long before I found myself on an extended professional plateau. I watched helplessly as others raced up the corporate ladder while my career played in slow motion speed. When I inquired as to the reasons for the stall, the responses were without substance. “You’re on the cusp,” was a recurring theme conjuring vivid images of a barren and abandoned promontory where I watched the action from afar and from which I was unable to escape.

I needed to do something although it was unclear as to what exactly. But what was clear was that I was awakening from a fairy tale in which the heroine gets the prize through hard work alone. I’d like to say that I had a clearly defined plan but I would be lying. Instead, it was more desperation leading to motivation. Perhaps that is exactly the recipe for success. My leadership skills were suddenly put to the test in real time and I armed myself with courage as I took action. In retrospect, my experiences can be rolled up nicely into 3 steps that ultimately led to jump start my career.

1. Believe in yourself!

If you don’t believe in yourself, you’ve already lost the battle. This will be the single most important thing that will get you through any setback and help you up when you stumble. Self-doubt reflects like a neon sign. No one will take you seriously if you lack confidence. Most importantly, remain true to yourself. Never allow anyone to push you past that imaginary line in the sand beyond which you lose sight of yourself.

2. Be bold!

Mr. Nadella is just plain wrong. His advice has never been applicable in any era. Competition is fierce. Men are constantly seeking ways to stand out from the pack. Why would things be any different for women? Get your nose out of the grindstone and take risks. Leap outside your comfort zone and ask for those challenging assignments. Better yet, demand them. Have the courage to risk failure as it will only lead to growth and that gets you further along than through inaction.

3. Be discoverable!

Make your presence known. Women feel uncomfortable in touting our accomplishments and owning our success. This is our issue and we must overcome it. We risk having others see right through us when we sit quietly in the sidelines. Leadership is all about speaking out so let’s get used to it. Yes, go ahead and sit at the table, lean in, raise your hand, and never be afraid to proclaim “Enough!”

These are exciting times where change is in the air. But it takes all of us, collectively and individually, to achieve true gender balanced leadership. So believe in yourself, be bold, be discoverable, and never give up!

Each one of us has an imaginary line in the sand that we refuse to cross and I felt that I had allowed myself to be nudged over my threshold.

It is only in hindsight that I am able to share my lessons learned.

By Rossana G. D’Antonio, PE, GE