Mentoring Professional Women at Work while Navigating Sexual Politics

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women working mentoring

By Cindy Krischer Goodman

The number of male managers who are uncomfortable mentoring women has more than tripled in 2018, with one in six male managers now hesitant to mentor a woman, a recent survey by the LeanIn.Org and SurveyMonkey found.

The survey results, considered a backlash from the wave of sexual harassment allegations known as the #MeToo movement, have sparked #MentorHer, a new campaign by LeanIn.Org. Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and founder of the nonprofit LeanIn.Org is calling for male managers to commit to mentoring women as a crucial component for equality in the workplace.

“We are at a pivotal moment,” Sandberg’s LeanIn.Org has announced. The #MentorHer campaign comes as the world celebrates International Women’s Day, a global celebration in March to celebrate the achievements of women. This year’s theme is a call to press forward and progress gender parity, a message Sandberg’s campaign embraces.

So far, Sandberg’s #MentorHer campaign has the backing of more than 38 prominent leaders and CEOs, including Disney’s Bob Iger, General Motors’ Mary Barra and Netflix’s Reed Hastings, who have committed to mentor women within their organizations.

The #MentorHer campaign is call to action to keep progress moving forward in advancing women to leadership positions. In a study on men who mentor women , The Harvard Business Review found receiving mentorship from senior males can increase compensation and career progress satisfaction for women, particularly for those working in male-dominated industries.

Why is Mentoring Important?

Maria Bailey, CEO of BSM Media, a 20-year-old social media and marketing firm, received mentoring from a half dozen male business leaders during her career. The mentoring, she said, helped her rise within the corporate environment of large public companies, and later succeed as a business owner.

“The best mentorships are based on shared values and professional chemistry,” Bailey said,

“Some men may be afraid now, but that will weed out people whose intention is not as strong in creating a mutually beneficial mentoring relationship. If a man really wants to help a woman grow her business or grow in her career, he will do that because great leaders are fearless leaders.”

Business executive Erin Knight, founder of a LeanIn Circle in Miami, said mentoring programs formed by corporations embolden female employees to become leaders but need protocols in place to encourage participation for both the mentor and the mentored. She comments, “I believe this will allow men to feel more comfortable participating.” At the same time, she said, “Women should continue to conduct themselves in a professional manner and seek the support of both males and females who share the same degree of integrity and professionalism.”

LeanIn.Org’s new survey findings on male hesitation to mentor females come as women already are underrepresented in most organizations, especially at senior levels. If fewer men mentor women, fewer women will rise to leadership, according to the organization’s findings.

On its website, LeanIn suggests men find at least one woman to mentor. Once identified, the organization advises the mentor to take give women specific input on the skills they need to build, give women skills-based feedback to improve their performances, put women’s names forward for stretch assignments, advocate for and open doors for women, and include women in opportunities to build valuable relationships.

Mentoring is on the Rise

Corporate mentoring is on the rise with about 71 percent of Fortune 500 companies offer mentoring programs to their employees, according to a study of workplace mentoring programs by Chronus, provider of talent and career development software. The study found the mentoring programs led to salary grade changes, higher retention rates and more promotions for the mentee and the mentor.

The benefits of mentoring are clear but evidence documented over the last ten years suggests sponsorship can be even more important because it entails people advocating for you as well as offering advice. Workplace experts consistently find mentorship and sponsorship play a key role in promotions and raises, stretch assignments and flexibility.

Unfortunately, women are 54% less likely to have a sponsor and 24% less likely to get advice from senior leaders, according to Lean In research.

The nonprofit has concluded that we all benefit when a colleague shows us the ropes and sponsors us for new opportunities; particularly when they’re more senior, as men often are.

What Stops Men from Mentoring Women?

The 2018 Lean In survey found half of male managers are “uncomfortable” working alone with a woman. According to a story we wrote in theglasshammer.com in 2013, the Center for Talent Innovation report named The Sponsor Effect, states that “senior men shy away from mentoring or sponsoring junior women because of assumptions about what that relationship entails. “

In a Harvard Business Review blog post, Sylvia Ann Hewlett, founding president and CEO of the Center for Talent Innovation, writes, “However, fear of being even suspected of an illicit sexual liaison causes 64 percent of senior men to pull back from one-on-one contact with junior women; conversely, for the same reason, 50 percent of junior women are hesitant to have one-on-one contact with senior men.”

How Can We Help Men Get Involved?

Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist, Wharton professor and business book author, has a few ideas. In his LinkedIn article titled Men Are Afraid to Mentor Women, Grant said men should hold themselves (and each other) accountable for parity, such as including women in meal outings. He also suggests men avoid running from discomfort and talk to women about what makes them comfortable or uncomfortable. Lastly, he advises men to mentor women in small groups if they are terrified of one-on-one.

Richard Outram, CEO of Financial Acumen, a financial consulting and leadership development firm, said he has and will continue to mentor women. Outram, a former executive at Burger King Corp, Sunglass Hut International, PRC LLC and PricewaterhouseCoopers, believes men who understand the value of the male/female mentoring relationships will continue as well. He states, “It’s eye-opening at times to put yourself in a female’s shoes. Women and men are wired in different ways and we can learn from each other.”

Outram said while some men may be reluctant in the wake of the #MeToo movement, more corporations are making diversity a priority and comments,

“A lot of companies are putting structure and accountability around mentorships to ensure they continue to happen,” He continues, “I won’t say it’s critical for a female to have a male mentor to get to the C-suite. There are female superstars who have made it on their own. But there are a ton of egos in the workplace, so you want a mentor who will help you through the challenges and do it with the right mindset.”

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Mentee to Mentor: Enhancing your Career through Diverse Perspectives

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Guest contributed by Financial Women of San Francisco Board Member Shelby Duncan

A few years ago , I discovered the Financial Women of San Francisco (FWSF), a community of women who work in financial services and are dedicated to advancing the careers of women.

After learning about the organization and the importance of their mission, I applied for a scholarship and was fortunate enough to become a recipient. Not only did I receive financial support, but I was given the opportunity to work with a mentor. I had been fortunate enough to have informal mentors throughout my college career, but was extremely fortunate to be given three women from FWSF, all in varying stages in their careers, lives, and outlooks, to support me as formal mentors as I stepped into the corporate world for the first time. The wealth of knowledge and combined experience that they were able to share taught me an insightful and valuable lesson – the greater my mentorship network, the more I could learn and subsequently contribute to my community.

Image via Shutterstock

Image via Shutterstock

I applied this knowledge as I began my career – identifying mentors, creating partnerships across my organization, and directly expanding my network by asking for further referrals. I built mentoring relationships with C-Suite men with 30 years of corporate experience, senior women of color seeking to innovate within financial services, and hard-working software developers beginning their careers in the United States having transitioned from careers in India. In building these relationships across a diverse community of people I have been able to see life through many lenses and have benefited from others’ knowledge, intelligence, innovative thinking, and in some cases, their mistakes. The diversity of their perspectives has allowed me the freedom to be more creative and identify solutions to complex problems. The balance in the advice I have received has made me confident that I am being steered in the right direction by the leaders in my life.

For several years now, I have continued to foster my relationships and identify new mentors. As I have progressed in my career, I have had the opportunity to be a mentor myself and have enjoyed helping mentees as they strive to create and meet new career goals.

Here are my steadfast tips and tricks for being a successful mentee:

1. Give back to your mentor – Ask yourself, “What can I do for my mentor?” Mentors set aside time, share contacts and other resources in support of your growth. It’s imperative to identify opportunities to give back and support your mentor. This can come in the form of supporting an organization they are part of, for example volunteering time; supporting them at a speaking engagement by sharing the event with your network and introducing them to people you know; or introducing them to one of your other mentors.

Oftentimes, mentees believe they don’t have much to offer their mentor based on their age or level of experience – but that is not the case! Time, energy, and a fresh perspective are important resources to share with your mentor.

2. Seek diverse mentorships – Leverage your network to identify diverse mentors. Look across industries, levels of experience, age, gender, and ethnicity to cultivate a well-balanced outlook.

3. Maintain the relationship – Building relationships is easy, but maintaining them requires thoughtfulness and time. Be sure to establish a plan with your mentor to determine how often they would like to meet, a location that is convenient for them, and always be willing to treat for coffee or lunch. Ask thoughtful questions about their work, and frame questions that ask for advice. Get to know them, as they are investing their time in getting to know you!

Mentorships are invaluable relationships that are imperative to growing, maintaining and propelling your career. I know that my successes are not solely my own, but a function of the leaders who support me. With that, I encourage you to reflect on the mentors in your life, identify opportunities to gain new mentors, and consider becoming a mentor yourself.

I recently read an amazing book called “We Should All Be Feminists” and here the Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (LINK PLEASE TO BOOK) states,
“Today, we live in a vastly different world. The person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative. And there are no hormones for those attributes.”

We Should All Be Feminists, to me, is one of the most critically important works I have read. Written by an immensely insightful and accomplished author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, deeply inspires me as her work is centered on the empowerment of women and their use of community as a tool to reach their objectives. She acknowledges that the collective is more powerful than the individual and that diversity – in gender, ethnicity, culture, and age – are some of societies’ greatest assets. I couldn’t agree more.

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Being the Mentee You Were Meant to Be

mentorsWhether already working with mentors or thinking about doing so in the future, mentees should keep a few things in mind to maximize the benefits and to minimize the stress.

Failing to put enough thought into career objectives, expecting mentors to do most of the heavy lifting and neglecting to show appreciation for the time commitment made by mentors could put a strain on the mentor-mentee relationship.

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Mentoring: 6 Ways to Help Your Mentee Think Strategically

mentorBy Robin Madell

If you’re a mentor, you have a lot of responsibility. Your mentee relies on you for valuable guidance, input, and advice on successful career navigation. But of all the lessons you might choose to impart or doors you might open for your protégé, how do you ensure that you are giving the right advice?

One of the primary goals of mentorship is for mentors to assist others in career advancement, preparing often more junior employees for that next promotion or opportunity. Yet research shows that a mentoring relationship doesn’t always result in promotions for women, especially compared to men. A report from Catalyst found that while having a mentor did help decrease the career advancement gender gap, it didn’t eliminate it. The study showed that men were promoted more often than women even when taking into account factors like prior work experience, starting level, and amount of time in their current role, as well as industry and region.

Strategic Thinking Linked to Effective Leadership
By examining this research, it’s clear that one area where mentors can focus their efforts is in helping mentees think more strategically. Strategic thinking can help people at all levels improve their chances for advancement by working smarter and not harder. What’s more, according to Robert Kabacoff in Harvard Business Review, strategic thinkers have been shown in many studies to rank among the most effective leaders within organizations.

For example, a 2013 global study by Management Research Group (MRG) of 60,000 managers in more than 140 countries and 26 industries discovered that taking a strategic approach to leadership was around 10 times more important to how effective a leader was perceived to be. Strategic thinking was found to be twice as important as communication and nearly 50 times more important than tactical, hands-on leadership behaviors.

This speaks volumes about the importance of mentors teaching mentees how to master taking a long-range approach to decision-making and problem-solving. Kabacoff notes that being mentored by someone with the “ability to keep people focused on strategic objectives and the impact of their actions” is a very effective way for mentees to develop their own strategic skills. He also suggests that strategic thinking is “as much of a mindset as a set of techniques.”

How can you as a mentor encourage your mentee to excel at strategic thinking?

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What To Tell Your Little Sister About Her First Internship

mentorsBy Ashley Mosley

These days, internships are a rite of passage for students and young professionals. That rite of passage, however, has recently been tested.

According to ProPublica, more than 30 lawsuits have been filed by interns against firms like Sony and Universal. While most complaints have to do with back pay, discrimination and sexual harassment have also been noted.

Consider this: Your little sister is venturing into her first internship. What sorts of things should you tell her? In order to optimize her role to ensure she’s getting the most out of her internship, here are things she needs to know:

Internships Should Be Educational
Contrary to the movies, internships shouldn’t be about grabbing coffee, running errands, or making photocopy after photocopy. They should directly relate to her field of study or boost her career in some way. Recent reports also suggest this is what the majority of interns want, with 30.2 percent reporting they want the chance to do real work and 47.3 percent reporting they are interested in access to executives and mentorship.

Interns Should Be Compensated For Their Work
Here’s the deal: Interns need to be compensated for their work. There’s no way around it. The majority of the 30+ lawsuits mentioned previously have to deal with compensation; the fact that interns were putting in the work, but not getting paid for it. Plus, paid interns are generally happier and more engaged. Being paid can also help the millions of students who have the burden of student loans.

Consider telling your little sister this: Paid internships not only attract the most diverse candidates, these interns also have an increased shot at getting hired.

If your little sister has taken on an unpaid internship, make sure she’s also aware of her rights — and alternatives she can request if pay is not an option: a stipend, skills training, networking opportunities, event attendance, flexibility, or company outings.

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Men as Allies

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iStock_000006954519XSmallBy Jarod Cerf

In a piece by Maria Shriver called “The Unfinished Revolution” for Time Magazine, a man was quoted as saying, “We haven’t thrown some switch to go from a man’s world to a woman’s world. It’s more like we’re finally, for the first time, in a position where it’s no longer only a man’s world. Now what does that mean?” In just a few words, he was able to articulate the question that is lingering over every workplace: what does it mean that dynamics have shifted? And perhaps more importantly: how do we move forward?

Recent studies suggest that mixed gender alliances can be complicated and plagued with tension. The Sponsor Effect reported that low availability or unwillingness to follow through on promised support (31 percent), apparent sexual tension (30 percent), insufficient guidance (27 percent), and fear of talking openly about appearance (20 percent) greatly diminished the quality of women’s partnerships with senior male executives.

More telling is the reason the women sought out such alliances: 75 percent elected to have male sponsors for their “perceived influence and ability to leverage among their networks” vs. 18 percent for “knowing how to succeed.” As the researchers themselves attest, while women are generally adept at building long-term and supportive relationships, men are far more accustomed to converting those bonds into favors, opportunities, and trust-enforcing obligations.

This style of leveraging or converting social bonds, however, often seems distasteful—if not altogether secondary—when compared to deeds and merits. This sentiment was echoed strongly by respondents featured in Catalyst’s “The Pipeline’s Broken Promise”, one of whom stated that “Women need to get more assertive” regarding rewards and compensation. “If it doesn’t come to you, ask for it. Men do,” she continued.

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Women’s Power in Numbers: How Sponsors and Protégés Can Band Together

iStock_000006712763XSmallBy Natalie Runyon, Shelley Beason, and Michele Hush

On the evening of November 20, Thomson Reuters and Wells Fargo Securities co-hosted a “Manhattan Mixer”, bringing together clients with senior female executives from both companies. Both Thomson Reuters and Wells Fargo are distinguished by their commitment to advancing women’s careers.

Together, these companies created an empowering night for women.

The event also had an interesting twist: senior women leaders were asked to invite a protégé. It is important for the advancement of emerging female leaders to have access to influential senior women. The “twist” on inviting protégés gave these women the opportunity to build personal connections with senior leaders based on a common goal: women’s advancement.

The keynote speaker was Diane Schumaker-Krieg, global head of Research, Economics, & Strategy at Wells Fargo Securities. An influential leader who believes in empowering other women, Schumaker-Krieg has been included in American Banker’s “25 Most Powerful Women in Finance” for the past four years, with the latest recognition coming in September of this year. Schumaker-Krieg is a strong advocate for women and passionate about supporting their career development.

The main takeaway from Schumaker-Krieg was her assertion that “women have power, especially when they band together.” During her remarks, the global head touched on her own career path and the importance of speaking up at the right time.

The event was also packed full of career tips for women’s advancement in business, strategies for sponsorship, and advice on developing power networks. For sponsors, Schumaker-Krieg recommended they reach out to emerging women leaders to ensure their ideas are heard. Sponsors were also encouraged to diversify their portfolio of protégés, advocating for two or three talented women rather than focusing on one.

For protégés, Schumaker-Krieg shared advice she learned through her many years in the trenches. A few of the key takeaways from her keynote included being great at what you do. While this sounds obvious, it is the most important thing you can do to get noticed. Ask for more responsibility: be sure to have specific ideas for how you can contribute in deeper, more expansive ways. Also, be creative/think outside the box and don’t be a wallflower; participate in all meetings, even “optional” ones. Volunteer to represent your team on important department or enterprise-level initiatives. Prepare ahead of time so that you can meaningfully advance the discussion. Also, promote the success of others. Your generosity will be remembered. To build your support network, reach out to groups within your company and outside your line of business. Learn what they do and how you can help them succeed.

During the event, new associations were made, and existing connections were reinforced. Each individual was challenged to make new contacts and to meet up with them in the month following the event. Indeed, events like these are the foundation for women expanding their power networks and supporting each other in advancing their careers.

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Sponsorship Remains a Murky Topic for Many

iStock_000010363335XSmallBy Melissa J. Anderson (New York City)

By now everyone has heard about sponsorship and how it can expand women’s career opportunities, right?

Not quite.

Despite sponsorship being a “buzz-word” in the women’s career advancement space for the past few years, the topic remains somewhat mysterious for a lot of people. At least, that’s what our latest study, “Women in Technology: Leaders of Tomorrow,” [PDF] suggests.

We polled almost 200 junior and mid-level women in technology jobs for the report, which was sponsored by Accenture. Our respondents provided us with a lot to work with – most notably, almost two-thirds said they hope to have a senior management or C-suite job someday. By most measures, these women aren’t suffering from the so-called lack of ambition that many have blamed for leadership diversity’s stalling progress. In fact, you could say these women seem to be “leaning in” pretty hard already.

Even still, most of the women who took our survey didn’t feel their companies were really “leaning in” to them in equal measure. In fact, only a quarter (24.5 percent) said that their company was “walking the talk,” by providing support that matched up with the verbal promises made by management to support women.

One of the results of haphazard or half-effort approaches to providing career development opportunities and training for women is that people don’t hear correct or full answers about what can actually help propel them to the top.

One of these things is sponsorship. Our research revealed a lot of confusion amongst our respondents about what sponsorship really entails. Sponsorship is so important for career advancement for everyone, but especially women – studies by Catalyst and the Center for Talent Innovation have confirmed this.

Women need to get a clear picture of what it looks like since they’re the ones who stand to lose the most if their understanding of sponsorship remains blurred. It’s up to companies and corporate development programs to demystify sponsorship for their female workforces. Here’s what we found.

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Mentor me: The Value of Male and Female Mentors

Business meeting.By Nneka Orji (London)

Mentoring, mentoring, mentoring. We are all constantly told about the positive impact a mentor can have on one’s career; from formal support and guidance, to very active yet informal promotion of a mentee’s achievements in the presence of senior colleagues. I, too, wrote about this very topic in a previous article, highlighting the benefits of mentoring in rebuilding the image of women at the workplace.

Based on the findings of numerous reports and studies, it is safe to say that mentors are invaluable, and we could all benefit from having someone in our corner. Yet according to a recent LinkedIn survey, 19 percent of professional women in the US stated they have never had a mentor. If the advantages of having a mentor are so clear, why are so many women missing out on the numerous opportunities that mentoring relationships offer?

Finding the Right Mentor

Over half of the LinkedIn survey respondents claim to have never found an appropriate mentor. This begs two questions:

1. Are the available mentors more “appropriate” for male mentees only?
2. Should women be more proactive or strategic in the way they seek mentors?

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Male Champions of Women’s Advancement are a Critical Ingredient for Equality

iStock_000006954519XSmallBy Melissa J. Anderson (New York City)

“There’s no such thing as the glass ceiling; only a thick layer of men.”

This is a quote that has been attributed to many formidable women over the years: Laura Liswood, Secretary General of the Council of Women World Leaders; Majora Carter, an environmental activist and Co-Founder & CEO of StartUpBox.SouthBronx; Kathy Matsui, Managing Director and Chief Japan Strategist at Goldman Sachs Japan; and Jane Harman, President of the Woodrow Wilson Center.

Regardless of who said it first (my money’s on Liswood), it acknowledges a fundamental fact. In order to achieve gender equality in leadership, we’re going to have to deal with the men in some way or another.

Most men are not actively keeping women out of top jobs. They’re simply bystanders to the inertia of millennia-old male-dominated power structures, and many don’t see what’s in it for them to put in the work to change a system that gives them an automatic boost — that is, if they are even aware that they’re getting bonus life points simply for being male in the first place.

But this is changing as people — both men and women — develop more awareness about the value of gender diversity. One senior individual who “gets it” can make a big difference. A Columbia study, for example, showed that at Danish companies whose CEOs have daughters, the wage gap between men and women workers tends to be smaller.

There is a vast array of research detailing the benefits of gender diversity in leadership. For example, Thomson Reuters recently released a new study showing that companies with gender-diverse boards outperform those with no women. Beyond the business case, though, we live in a society that supposedly values diversity, equality, and meritocracy. The work to engage a fair share of women in leadership should be a project we are all engaged in, whatever our gender.

Men make up about half of the entry-level workforce for professional careers, and there is a greater percentage of men at every rung moving up the ladder. At the senior management level, the vast majority of people are men. In order to achieve real equality, men need to be encouraged to get involved in gender diversity. After all, a simple look at the same ladder shows that they make the lion’s share of decisions on who gets hired and who gets promoted.

Our latest research shows that, at many companies, some men are working to support women’s advancement. What’s more, the presence male champions of gender equality at a company often signifies the presence of other kinds of support for women in the same organization. When men get involved in diversity, companies do more.

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