Leadership Lessons You Learned on the Playground
Contributed by The Runaway MBA
I have reached the stage of my life where my friends are becoming parents daily. We often discuss how they plan to raise their kids and the lessons and values that they hope to instill in their children. After these discussions, I cannot help but reflect why some of those lessons from early childhood are so important throughout your life. Life is a journey, and the best lessons learned on how to be successful along that journey come from the lessons on the playground.
- Learning how to stand up to the playground bully and solve other conflict.
When I reflect upon my childhood, often my mother was so protective of me. When she heard of a fight at school or someone making fun of me, she sought to protect her cub. She never hesitated to reach out to the opposing parent and negotiate an apology or solution to the brawl. She acted instinctively on guard because her child was at risk. However, she failed to let me learn how to defend myself appropriately, work out my own issues, and stand up for my beliefs. - Learning how realize that you are wrong, say you’re sorry.
As the only boy and youngest cousin, often my brother was coddled to the point where he strutted along like the little prince. In his eye he could do no wrong. But occasionally he made a mistake or two and deflected with, “Well, I am the boy.” He did not have the ability to recognize a mistake, apologize, and rectify the situation. Learning how to make amends and maintain your composure is a skill of a winner. - Learning how to work well with others.
I remember joining a soccer team and fearing that if passed the ball onto another team member, they might not receive the ball. This fear of trusting my teammates drove me to excel as a singles tennis player. But it did not solve the main issue – I needed to learn how to work well with others. As a professional, trust is the key element of teamwork. Sometimes we may not agree with the style of play of our teammate; but because that person is on our team, we need to put forth the effort and let them know that we have their back and respect them even when our opinion is different. - Learning how to dust yourself off when you fall down and move on.
My parents so wanted me to succeed in my elementary school days that I now believe that they guarded the path with bumpers as a precaution in case I should fall. This path was so strictly guided that there was little room to be misguided, to accidentally get lost, or to test out different routes. It was sufficiently cushioned that I did not have to learn how pick myself up and keep moving because it was always moving for me. I suppose that it would have helped me develop a thicker skin to handle rejection and alternative choices sooner. Life will not always go according to plan. Sometime I need to redirect energy focused on what went wrong towards the direction of getting back up, dusting myself off, and moving forward to accomplish my goal even if it takes longer. - Learning how to be a true competitor and handle loosing with respect.
Often on family vacations we would play card games like “go fish” or “old maid” on rainy days. In these games I played to win and occasionally I lost. Instead of viewing those instances like a setback, I stormed off in a huff looking for excuses to blame my loss and hide my embarrassment. Instead of retreating, I lacked the self-confidence to enter a competition with the knowledge that sometime winning is not always possible and with an ability to shake the competitor’s hand when in defeat. Sometimes what matters is having a winning attitude and doing everything possible to work towards that goal. Establishing self-confidence early in life is so important in order for one to head into any situation with the appropriate attitude in order to move on regardless of the situation’s outcome.
I recognize that being a parent is one of the toughest roles that a woman can fulfill in her life. I often wonder what kind of mother I will be. I hope that when the opportunity comes that I remember these lessons above as a guidebook to raise a strong and confident child.
