Op-Ed: Playing in the Big Leagues Instead of the “Special” League

Contributed by Carol Roth

The glass ceiling has gone digital. Even though we are in a new age of information and engagement, there is still the old boys’ network in place. When you think of the top thought leaders, authors, and influencers, the names that are bantered about are more often than not male. There a very few women in the top spots or being given the credit they deserve when it comes to business—except for in “special” women’s lists and women-only groups.

“Top Women in Social Media” lists, “Top Women Authors” lists, women’s conferences, and women’s networking groups are creating, as marketing and advertising executive Margie Clayman calls it, a “league of our own.” These are supposed to help recognize women’s achievements, develop leadership skills, or create networking and business development opportunities. However, this special treatment actually is having a negative effect on our progress.

The league of our own further segregates women instead of integrating us alongside our male peers and coworkers. How? Gender segregation in business organizations makes it less likely for us women to secure top spots, because we are being isolated from those making the decisions at the top. If we aren’t working and playing alongside men, we aren’t going to benefit from mentoring opportunities. We aren’t going to be top of mind when someone is considering filling a C-suite position or scouting for a conference speaker. We aren’t going to be the first call to get the “big deal,” because we are hanging out with other women who are primarily in the same position—and not the decision makers.

Moreover, putting us in a league of our own makes us seem like a special interest group. We aren’t. We would be horrified by a men’s-only networking group. Why put ourselves at a distance by doing the same thing as women? I don’t want to be a female entrepreneur. I want to be an entrepreneur with the same opportunities as anyone else, regardless of my anatomy.

Let’s focus on integration instead of segregation!

Below are some of my thoughts on ways we can be more assertive, and how we can step up and claim a spot in the big leagues, instead of waiting for a minor league team to form.

Open Your Mouth. Women often expect a meritocracy to exist in business—in other words, if you do good work, you will be noticed and rewarded. Don’t hold your breath for this to happen. If you want something—whether it be a promotion or business deal—don’t wait for it to fall into your lap. Ask for it and back it up with those quantifiable measures of what you have accomplished or why you are the best person for it.

Don’t Be Ms. Congeniality. Wanting colleagues or clients to like you is human nature, but women tend to go overboard by being too nice, too giving, and too concerned that people will “like” them. Focus on being respected for your work instead of being viewed as “nice” or “likeable.” I’ve found that being completely honest and unabashedly frank opens doors in business dealings.

Stop Doing Everything Yourself. Because women are naturally talented in a variety of areas, we often step up when projects need to be completed or gaps filled. Women need to delegate tasks and share responsibilities; an effective business owner works on the strategy and project management, not necessarily every facet of every tactic of a project.

Take a Seat at the Boys’ Table. The concept of women’s groups can be damaging for your career as it singles out women as a “special needs” group. It’s like sitting at the kids’ table during holiday dinner. Instead of joining the women’s group, don’t be afraid to grab your seat at the men’s table, even if you are the only woman. You need to establish those relationships if you want to play in the same league.

Don’t Be so Hard on Yourself. Women are harsh critics of themselves, which can sometimes make normal obstacles become insurmountable. You attract what you put out there. If you give off the impression that you think you are doing a sub-par job, that will be your colleagues’ or clients’ impressions as well. Project confidence and understand that roadblocks will happen. It’s how you deal with them that matters.

Carol Roth has been helping businesses grow for over 15 years, ranging from solopreneurs to multinational corporations. She has helped them raise more than $1 billion in capital, complete hundreds of millions of dollars in M&A transactions, secure high-profile licensing and partnership deals, create brand loyalty programs, and more. A popular media personality on Fox News, MSNBC, and WGN-TV Chicago, among others, she has an award-winning blog at www.CarolRoth.com. Her new book is The Entrepreneur Equation: Evaluating the Realities, Risks, and Rewards of Having Your Own Business (BenBella Books, March 2011).

Opinions expressed by guest writers do not necessarily reflect the views of The Glass Hammer team.