Ask-A-Career Coach: What Do You Do When Your Contacts Don’t Respond?

Contributed by Caroline Ceniza-Levine of SixFigureStart

I have left several messages for people who know me well, but they haven’t called me back. What else can I do? I’d like to talk to them about my job search.

I’m not sure from the question how many times you have tried to reach your contacts, but I always advise a minimum of three times, including different medium (i.e., phone and email, not just one or the other). With email, you are never sure if the person even received it. Perhaps it went to his/her “spam” folder. Perhaps the person thought s/he responded but accidentally deleted it instead. The same goes for a phone message. So, at a minimum, you should try to contact someone three times by at least two different methods.

The question implies that the contacts are people who normally would return your messages. As a general rule, if you are not hearing back from someone who would usually get back to you, be careful how far you push it. Maybe something has happened and this person is going through a crisis. Maybe this person is on vacation or in a crunch period at work. Or maybe your relationship has lapsed. You need to decide next steps based on how badly you want this relationship and what you know about this person’s responsiveness. So this is less a protocol question than a case-by-case judgment call.

Finally, this volatile job market has brought out a lot of bad networking behavior. People who normally don’t contact are contacting out of the blue and aggressively asking for favors, references, and job leads. If your network is shying away from you, it is possible that you are asking too much. Remember that the best networking is about giving to others and sharing with others—your need for something is not a good reason to reach out. Don’t make every contact with your network about your job search or even about you. Focus on giving first.

Caroline Ceniza-Levine is a career coach, writer, speaker, Gen Y expert and co-founder of SixFigureStart, a career coaching firm comprised of former Fortune 500 recruiters. Formerly in corporate HR and retained search, Caroline most recently headed University Relations for Time Inc and has also recruited for Accenture, Citibank, Disney ABC, and others. Caroline is also an Adjunct Assistant Professor of Professional Development at Columbia University, School of International and Public Affairs and a life coach .